ugh. do i have the right to be mad?

Question

okay, well.. its late night, talking with my boyfriend on the phone. and he tells me he doesnt want to talk. number one) hes not in the mood to talk on the phone --even though we usually talk at night-- and number two) he said its hard to talk ont he phone and play VIDEOGAMES at the same time.

okay. videogames?
hes hanging up with me so he can play games?
..should i be mad? or are all guys like this and i should be used of it by now.
and its not the first time we said goodbye on the phone cause he was playing games.

soo.... hrmm.. should i talk to him about it? or will it frustrate him..? ..cause.. im a little upset.. i really wanted to talk to him last night but ..well.. you get the point..

thanks

Answer 1

yeah i seriously think you have the right to be mad. you should tell him if its frustrating you..
if you're upset you should let him know
and if he loves you, he'll understand..
..but idk if he'll stop the videogames girl... lol
good luck!

Answer 2

Do not be mad... Guy like to play video games. That is big for them. I have been married for 2 year and lived with my husband for a year before marriage so I know first hand that the video games never stop. At first I did not understand it, but now I am just used to it. Just stop being insecure about the relationship, you never know when one day you are not going to be in the mood to talk or busy doing something you love to do. Would you want him to be mad at you if you just id not want to talk or you were trying to do something? No, you would want him to understand. So, just be understanding. Best of luck... and get over the video games because the sooner you do that the better off you will be.

Answer 3

Being mad solves nothing first of all. You're going to go about this all wrong and take the ignored girlfriend approach which would be a HORRIBLE thing to do. Also this obviously isnt a continuous problem as you state

"even though we usually talk at night"

If this situation continues like this..Then its obviously something more than "Its hard to talk and play games" at the same time excuse.

Answer 4

How old are you guys? This is an important factor.

If you're young (in high school), it's totally normal. Most guys hate talking on the telephone anyway, and you don't really get into real lasting relationships until college at the very least.

If you're older, this is a much bigger deal. I had a boyfriend for a while who started not talking to me because of video games. Then it progressed to not going to class (college), failing out of school, not leaving the house, not bathing, leaving me on his doorstep ringing the bell for half an hour because he 'was in the middle of a raid'.

Only you know how serious this is. If it really bothers you, talk to him about it. But realize most men are going to think that you're the crazy one. Personally, the best thing I ever did was get rid of that video game obsessed loser.

Good luck.

Answer 5

No you shouldn't be upset. There will come a time when you need a little bit of time to yourself. Maybe the boyfriend got a new game he has been dying to play and this was really his first chance.. Look at it this way, better to have him home playing video games then out with another girl..

But the most important thing is most people at times do need a little time to just themselves. I am sure he didn't mean to hurt your feelings or upset you.

Answer 6

Yes, all guys are like that. And yes, you have the right to be mad. You need to talk to him about it and be blunt. I had the same fight with my bf. And I just asked him, which is more important, me or the games? I lived 3 hours away, so my phone call was more important. But if you guys see each other all day, every day, give him some alone time. You both need time apart and being a guy, he probably lacks the communication skills to tell you that.

Answer 7

First and foremost, you will not ever be able to stop him from playing his video games...

Allow him to play the games, and respect the fact that he was honest about it. He could have stayed on the phone w/ you and ignored you all night.

Instead of getting mad, say nothing at all about it. When he wants to hang up to play the game, just say okay, goodnight, and hang up. Go to sleep, or find a hobby of your own.

Also, my boyfriend has always told me that nagging, or going on and on about something does not work w/ men. And, I have found this to be true. Instead, state you peace... Honey, I really want to talk to you, or... Honey, I'm jealous of your video games...Whatever is the case....But, do not elaborate (unless he asks)!

Oh, and believe me you are not the only female who is going or has gone through this.

Answer 8

I love geeky guys. They are smart, funny, successful and, in a lot of cases, video games come with the territory.

I have the same argument with my husband. We have been married for three, together for 7 and have a 2 year old daughter. I kind of thought he would play fewer games as time went on, but it kind of stays the same. For me, its not worth the fight because there are so many wonderful things about him.

However, I have dated a lot of guys who love video games and there is one thing that is clear to me now. Each of them has some sort of idea of how much time they want to spend on games and that rarely changes.

So, the question to you is: "How much time does he spend on the games and can you deal with that?" If the answer is no, then you need to move on.

My other suggestion is to play some yourself. If he is playing World of Warcraft, you can actually get your own character, log on and play together. If you can't beat them, join 'em.

Hope this helps.

Answer 9

Well first of all some guys are just idiots. If a guy thinks that his girl wouldn't get mad due to this then he is way wrong. I know 90% of the girls I know would be upset as well. I once was in this same situation. I told my bf that if games were more important than he needed to get his priorities straight and I wasn't going to waste any more time waiting.

Answer 10

Boys will be boys. Dont worry about it. Guys are just like that. They don't want to talk so they can play their video games nothing new with that. I mean you could talk to him but it prolly won't do anything. He'll just figure your being too clingy. I would really just let it be. Talking also isn't that important to guys. The phone just isn't their thing. He's still into you and all just he didn't want to talk. Its not a big deal and its not anything to be mad about.

Answer 11

that's just what men do. my dad is almost 50 and still does this when I call him from Germany to say hello. just have a face to face with him saying that you'd appreciate if he could devote an hour or so of undivided attention to you a few times a week. but don't expect to get every night. and be happy that this is you're biggest problem. oh, and here's another thing about men with video games that my husband told me. a lot of times they use it as sort of an escape. like some people read books or paint or draw or something to destress and get away from the world for a minute, sometimes people use video games. my husband is one of those people. maybe your boyfriend is too. it seems like a mindless waste of time to us, because we don't see the games in that way. but for them, it's an important way to destress.