now i just got served with papers about her and her grandma is wanting me to pay child support for her staying there, i have tried numerous times to get her to talk to me but she just screams at me and uses vaulgar language towards me. i do have full custody of her. please give me some advise that i may be able to work with
2006-12-28 03:20:57 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I agree with the previous poster. You need legal advice based upon the laws in your state or province. Have you talked to the grandma about the situation and about why she moved out?
2006-12-28 03:24:36 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
She is still a minor and you have custody. Why did you let her move out? Why did grandma let her move it? Sounds like some serious family issues. Call the cops and get the kid back in your house.
Although from the sounds of it, why would you want to? I'd suggest not paying any support since she will be out of there soon anyway (or at least 18 and not eligible for any support).
2006-12-28 06:33:13 · answer #2 · answered by Goose&Tonic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Until she is 18, she cannot decide where she wants to be legally. Her Grandma cannot legally seek child support when you have done nothing wrong (that is ridiculous!). Her Grandma should send her back where she belongs and inform her to pay her own way if she wants to act like an adult. All you need to do is explain that your home is still open to the child, and that you will provide for her within reason. Your daughter needs a thrashing, but, then, I guess that's against the law. I had a son who ran away from home, and I finally got him back home and following my rules after he had exhausted his efforts trying to live elsewhere. Grandma, needs to back off and stay out of it and giving her a crutch to use against you. Your daughter is rebelling and Grandma has seceded with her. Good luck, but legally, they can't do anything (I can't believe a lawyer even took this on - unless there is abuse involved, and they would have to prove that).
2006-12-28 03:31:09 · answer #3 · answered by Doug R 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you have custody of your daughter, you don't have to pay child support to anyone. By the time any legalities would be finalized, your daughter will be 18 and on her own.
Perhaps you not helping her will give her the kick in the pants she needs to grow up. I just hope her grandma doesn't let her sponge of of her, or else your daughter is going to be a miserable person for a long, long time. Try to see if perhaps you can get her (or make her) go to family counseling. See must have some deep rooted issues to act out the way she is doing.
Good luck.
2006-12-28 03:25:12 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
The fact that she has left the house and she's 17 , she not very cleaver. Your daughter has one more year before she is on her own legally. She has left on her own and you are not responsible. Tell her to go on welfare and have her grandparents get support that way. (OK that's harsh)
Do not say anything to her regarding, her birthday turning 18 years old and then considered an adult.
Put your foot down and make it clear to her grandparents where her home is. Inform them that she can not stay there and if she does it is of her own free will (refuse to pay).
- By the time this goes through the courts, your daughter will be old enough to take care of herself. I believe the age in US and Canada is 16 years old.
If you find a good lawyer, he will give you the same advise. But you don't need a lawyer, go to court without one. They will give you TIME to find one. You can also request mediation with your daughter because of her age( birthday is right around the corner).
This experience requires tuff love, so stand your ground. She has shown you she is not grateful and she doesn't respect you and your rules. With no place to run and someone to stand up for her she will realize the path that she has made for herself.
It will be short but sweet.
2006-12-28 03:40:59 · answer #5 · answered by B1 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would get a lawyer first off. If you think about it when she turns 18 you will no longer have to pay the support unless she continues in school and then she is going to have to get a job unless her grandmother is planning on supporting her, which I do not think will happen due to her asking for support. It sounds like your daughter has some really serious issues that need to be dealt with asap or she is going to find herself in some big trouble later. If I knew more about what she is pissed about I could try to give you some advice. Good luck.
2006-12-28 03:33:33 · answer #6 · answered by golden rider 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Go to grandma's and tell her to come home right now if necessary call the police. Tell Grandma that you will not pay child support for the brat. Grandma is encouraging her and it doesnt sound like she needs much encouragement. If the police will not make her come home then leave her there but give her or grandma no money no help at all. If she wants your help she can come home and behave herself.
2006-12-28 05:52:40 · answer #7 · answered by elaeblue 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you have full custody of her, just go over to Grandma's and bring her back. Otherwise, consider the child support money well spent to keep the spoiled little cat out of your hair.
2006-12-28 03:29:41 · answer #8 · answered by Rachel M 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I suggest mediation (the act of bringing in a third party to settle differences) maybe if you could have someone else talk to her for you, you could get her to see things your way. Also the grandmother is entitled to nothing you don't have to pay child support cause you have custody if she wants to argue that then you can simply take your daughter back. 17 is still a minor and until she hits 18 she is in your care. I hope you get things straitened out.
2006-12-28 03:31:09 · answer #9 · answered by master_furches 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
How can the g'ma serve you w/ child support papers if you have custody? If you have full custody then the court will not grant her child support, unless and until she can prove that you are unfit, and then she will have to fight for custody herself. All of this will have to be done in a court of law, so you will have to retain a lawyer. I wish you luck.
2006-12-28 03:25:09 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋