We are engaged to be married, but I feel like we have reached a point that married couples reach at some point. I am referring to the point where we are not making love as much and she is starting to treat me like less than an equal? Is this a sign of problems to come when we finally say "I do"?
2006-12-28 02:17:00 · 25 answers · asked by Mr. Smartypants 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If you reached a "point" with her that you say some married couples do, what makes you think you wont get there with anyone else? Spice it up a little! Cook her dinner, send her flowers, introduce something new into the bedroom. Any relationship takes effort. Dont just throw in the towl after ten years without at least talking to her about it..
2006-12-28 02:21:45 · answer #1 · answered by *RoCKsTaR* mommy of 1!! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi there engaged for ten years and not married oops. I guess you have passed the feeling stage for each other.NOw you will understand why the catholic Church is so strict about marriage because once the feeling is gone it is at times pure will power to love the other person and to look out for the good of the other. Hope you are not living together, because if you are then stay separate and rebuild respect and trust before getting married. Otherwise as you say you are heading for the other end ...separation
2006-12-28 10:25:52 · answer #2 · answered by Gerard P 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whoa! 10 years and STILL NOT married.... IF I ever had to wait that long, I would have been LONG GONE. Someone in this relationship has some SERIOUS committment issues. I dont think these are good reasons to end such a long relationship, maybe you two would benefit from some councelling. Think about it... Most relationships in general dont last very long. 10 years is a LONG time to get along with one person, if you have made it this far, then I think you are just reaching a boring phase and both of you need to shake things up. Good luck to you.
2006-12-28 10:20:39 · answer #3 · answered by Angel Eve 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not necessarily, it just means you're in a rut. You can fix this by taking a vacation together, or finding some other way to spice up your relationship. Also, tell her how you feel -she may not even notice that she's treating you differently. If you truly feel you're working only on momentum, and your relationship can't get any better, then the two of you should have a talk about why you're engaged.
2006-12-28 10:19:50 · answer #4 · answered by halie_blue 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It could just be "cold feet"! Relationships go through ups and downs as I'm sure you know! You may need to carefully talk with her about how she is treating you! I have a sneaking feeling that you would miss her if you were to terminate the relationship! Think long and hard about how to broach the subject! Think long and hard about weather or not you love her anymore! All the good things in life require work! Maybe the relationship just needs some work!
2006-12-28 10:24:05 · answer #5 · answered by Dee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is starting to take you for granted. NOT necessarily a bad thing, just kinda like being stuck in a rut. People get "comfortable" with each other after a while and it just happens. Do some things you and her used to do few yrs. ago to change the monotony of the relationship. Could also be cold feet. Women get them too. Be spontaneous for a change and see what happens. you have survived 10 yrs. and that is longer than a lot of marriages or any relationships do sometimes. It's worth working on.!!!!
2006-12-28 10:24:01 · answer #6 · answered by Deb 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why have you been in a relationship for 10 years and your not married yet? I think that you need to talk to her and find out if she is feeling the same as you. We can all tell you what we think but its what you and her think that is the key. If you are feeling that there is a problem then there probably is. But you won't know what to do until you talk to her. GOOD LUCK
2006-12-28 10:22:24 · answer #7 · answered by *queenfairy1*Antioch California 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well well well mister smarty pants scared already so you think that you should break up because you aren´t having sex and shes not treating you well.If you really love her what you should do is take those 10 years and put them on the table you don't like the direction things are taking talk about it! Don't just walk away every relationship as its downs and its together that you find the up´s.Good luck
2006-12-28 10:42:10 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Uh, yeah! Personally, I say be grateful you haven't married her yet. The honeymoon's over before the wedding.
It's probably best you start fresh with another woman. It may be a crude thing to say, but after having been married for almost 10 years, I think you have milked that one for all she's worth. If you haven't committed to marriage by now, what's the point?
2006-12-28 10:23:07 · answer #9 · answered by Leroy 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You have to ask yourself this, do I see myself with this person for the rest of like? If you answer is no or I dont know then ask yourself this question, do i see myself WITHOUT this person for the rest of my life?
Then picture your life without her and what it would like to start over and find a new girl. Then picture yourself with her for another 10 years. You need to think about these choices before coming to a conclusion.
2006-12-28 10:21:08 · answer #10 · answered by TroubleRose 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋