my other friends say i'm too nice to him... i've told him more than once that i will only like him as a friend. then for a while he seemed to stop following me... but now... he started again...
whenever he buys me stuff or treats me, i feel guilty, and he says that's how he wants me to feel... actually i would like it if he stopped... but i dont want him to feel bad... because i think he's a bit lonely...
i asked him what he wants from me, since i've already told him that i won't like him more than a friend... and he says he doesn't know... it actually scares me... because i don't know what he wants from me... maybe it's normal to do something for the person you like without asking something in return? yet.... guilt..
i just think i'll never like him that way.... but i don't want to hurt him ..
2006-12-28 00:59:03 · 5 answers · asked by beyingnobody 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I had this happen between me and a very good friend. Sit down and firmly tell him the way that you feel, that you could never be anything more. Tell him that you will be dating other people and if he is comfortable with that then you should be able to remain friends.
As for the buying stuff....my friend never really bought stuff for me, but if he had I would have given it back and if he refused I would have given it to a sister/friend and told him so (and pointed out that I wasn't comfortable accepting gifts, he should save them for his gf) but we would go out to lunch all of the time (we were in the same program at school so we had the same lunch break). We would just take turns buying. He would buy one time and I would buy the next. If your friend objects then tell him FIRMLY that this is the way it has to be.
2006-12-28 01:08:19 · answer #1 · answered by Nicole E 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't stop hurting him. He has set himself up as the target.
You have been honest and upfront with him. You have done what is right.....but you must NOT accept anything from him. He will think he is breaking you down and will pursue even harder. You must not give him any ammunition to fill his head with hopes and dreams.
You should avoid this person if you can.
This is not a healthy thing. He is overwhelmed with feelings for you and can't control himself. He is all or nothing and you can't change that.
What you can change is how you deal with it.
You need to be firm and if necessary hard as stone.
If you give him an inch he will take a mile.
This is someone who is infatuated with you... Be careful, this could turn ugly.
Keep your distance....
2006-12-28 01:10:28 · answer #2 · answered by doclakewrite 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to distance yourself away from this guy... he seems a bit obsessed. You have already expressed that you are not interested in him like that and that's all that you should have to do. Don't accept any gifts or favors from him because he probably thinks that you accepting those gifts justifies his feelings for you and gives him hope that one day you may come around. Trust me, leave him alone and soon before someone gets hurt. Good luck and God bless!
2006-12-28 01:06:22 · answer #3 · answered by TRUST_ME 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, u can be with him but if u saw pretty or cute girl just say something like "hey, look that girl is hot, y dont u go for her" act like u guys r best friend. dont trust him like he is doing something bad to u.
2006-12-28 01:03:44 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him sorry you ruin my appetite.
even it sounds cruel,you have to.
2006-12-28 01:08:04 · answer #5 · answered by earthlove 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋