Does anyone know someone who was killed by a drunk driver and if so, how do you handle it?

Answer 1

I kow of a couple of people who have been killed by drunk drivers.
They were not close so maybe my answer is not sufficient for you.
Mostly those who knew them were enraged at the fact that the drivers had been arrested previously for drunk driving.
Check with MADD, I am sure they have someone you can talk with about it.
The main thing is to not allow the pain and frustration turn into hate, or revenge because that will swallow you up and destroy you and that is not what is in anybody's best interest.
In the midst of it, it is difficult to hear the words forgive, but in the long run it is the thing which brings healing to a devastating situation.
You must understand that forgiveness is not condoning the action.
(P.S.) I was run over by a drunk driver when I was a kid, spent a long time in the hospital, not any severe lifelong wheelchair type injuries. Have I forgiven that person? Yes, not face to face because it was so long ago and I don't know who they are, don't need to find out, but it makes a difference in the way I can live to day to not harbour any resentment or anger toward that person.

Answer 2

This is a toughie. A lady I work with lost her 22 year old son in 2004 to a drunk driver. Actually a drunk driver in a stolen car and he was also and illegal immigrant and had no insurance. That was the hardest part for her to swallow. She still has rough days where she just can't function and has to go home. She couldn't even go to the burial or even the cemetery until the grass had grown over the grave. His room is still how he left it. She can't touch it.

On the flip side, this lady is in our HR department. I work for a non-profit company and at this particular building- we have our admin. offices and a women's work release facility. On January 2nd we have a woman coming (as a resident/inmate) that was involved in a drunk driving accident that killed an entire family. She was the drunk driver. She's a very well-to-do woman and was at first shocked that she was actually sentenced to do any time (duh). I am stunned that instead of prison time, she got sent to a work release facility. She has to do 2 years here. If you aren't aware, it operates like a prison however they get to leave on passes, have visits daily, go out and find jobs, ect. She killed like 4 or 5 people and got off doing 2 years with us. Whereas, other people that have killed others in drunk driving accidents (just in my area or state) get like 10-20 years. It's unbelievable how the justice system works.

Oh and my uncle is an alcoholic, but luckily he hasn't injured anyone yet. He's been pulled over for DUI's more times than I can count, but the state never does anything about it. Nothing stops these people from getting in a car and driving drunk.

With New Year's coming up, please drink responsibly or have a designated driver or even splurge to get a limo with your friends. Paying a little more for safety is priceless compared to injuring or killing people. Have a safe and happy 2007 everyone.

So, really to answer your question, I suggest counseling- be it local MADD groups or the like, or even paying for a therapist. My work offers counseling with a program called EPA- maybe your work has something similar. We can go anytime we need for anything we need to cope with.

Answer 3

20 years ago my fiancee was killed by a drunk driver. Despite having married another man and raised children in the meantime, I can't help but wonder nearly every day what might have been. The person that killed my fiancee destroyed not only his life, but his parents' and mine. I'm happily married now and I love my husband very much, but whatever David and I might have had together, our future, our children. Countless lifetimes full of potential were taken away by one selfish, stupid, tragic act.

My only comfort is that the drunk driver died too. That at least gave me some closure. Had he lived, I don't think I could have gotten over my anger. I probably would have killed him myself.

Answer 4

drunk driver- no, but driver yes. My brother-in-law, his mother, and my sister's unborn child were all killed recently in a car accident involving a shoplifter running from the crime. My sister was badly injured and almost died. Also, my nephew was hurt in the wreck. Basically, I got through each day by prayer and support from family and friends. I learned that anger and resentment only brought more pain and did not help. Good luck with your recovery.

Answer 5

My uncle was the drunk driver, but he was killed instantly when he crashed into a tree. Its hard but the best way is to talk about it. If your not comfortable talking about it with friends or family, go ahead and talk to a teacher/boss. Or even, a therapist. Also, try to keep your mind busy so your not ALWAYS grieving, too much of it is not good. If your asking this question bc someone passed, then i hope you are able to keep living your life, but always remember theirs. Good Luck.

Answer 6

You can get support from MADD or DADD. Its "mothers against drunk driving, and its attached agency for men, 'dads against drunk driving". Sorry if you have incurred any loss due to someone else's negligence, and I have not personally had any such tragedy happen to my family, but, know of others that has, and used these groups for support. They are also victims of drunk driving.

Answer 7

I responded with my local fire department to a head on accident that was involving alcohol and cut my dead friend out of the car. It took 1 1/2 hours to get him out and 2 for the other guy.

Answer 8

Yes, my daughter a week or so ago. she was 17. How do i handle it, all i can do is pray for the strength to overcome the sadness of the event. It will take time.

Answer 9

Cousin. Not very well. Still hurts to think about it.

Answer 10

my cousin. you just cry a lot and eventually the pain eases but it's still there.