I was friends with a guy who I really liked but he didn't want to get serious. He told me a week ago he had a gf and I was a little crushed. I don't know how long they've been together and I gave him a xmas gift and letter, saying I was going to lean back. I feel like if we ever got together seriously I would resent him, because I feel like I'm second choice. Should I just forget the entire situation?
2006-12-27 16:37:24 · 18 answers · asked by TILAC 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It was a reason that god didn't allow the two of you to be more than just friends count it as a blessing and move on.
2006-12-27 16:42:03 · answer #1 · answered by heartbroken 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello,
I suggest that you move on for now there are other guys out here in the huge world we live in. I am sure that you were crushed when he told you he had a girlfriend. But hun, let's look at it this way. At least he was man enough to tell you instead of getting serious with you and you finding out he had a girlfriend then.
Why would you resent him? why would you feel like second choice?
You've stated he has a girlfriend and you two are friends.. I am not getting that at all. Second choice ??hun if you stop and think about it you wouldn't be second choice as he's not dating you right now. And if in the future the both of you got together your still not second choice.
Your making this situation as the old saying goes your making a mountain out of a mole hill.
Sweetheart just move on and forget this whole situation.. I don't see this being a good thing. Why? Well you might hold this over the guys head and who wants to hear about this later in a relationship?
Instead of leaning back.. hun push forward!!
Good luck.
2006-12-27 16:59:32 · answer #2 · answered by ssgtmommy01 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It probably is time to step back and look at the situation. You deserve to be the first in his life, not the second choice. I've settled so many times for the second one (the fall back gal, available when his life turns upside down). I've done that too many times, you just get your heart broken. Don't waste anymore time, put on a cute outfit, go out and meet someone new!!!!
2006-12-27 16:44:02 · answer #3 · answered by Martini Babee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So you are only going to date men who have never had a girlfriend before?
Give him some credit for not changing his loyalty to his woman the second another one comes along.
You feel this way now because you are disappointed that he isn't available for you at the moment.
You may feel differently by the time his situation changes.
Meanwhile you would be smart to not put yourself up on a shelf to wait for that day to come, so keep on dating, & have fun.
Cheers!
2006-12-27 16:45:22 · answer #4 · answered by No More 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok....personally, the xmas gift probly scored you a few points ;)
but back to your question, Chances are you will not have a chance with him. but there is always the possibility that he is being peer-pressured into going out with that other girl. or maybe if he is soft he doesnt want to hurt your feelings. truthfully this is a hard question to answer. but i think if you try hard you can win him over. if you dont, there are 3 trillion other people in the world that might be the one you want =)
Good Luck!
2006-12-27 16:41:49 · answer #5 · answered by chuck 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You just need to move on. He may eventually come around again when he is ready. Remember men like a women who challenges him and make them work for it. If a women is too clingy and easy to get a man generally doesn't want them anymore because the chase is over. In the mean time move on with your life and get yourself another man:)
2006-12-27 16:42:05 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are two types of approaches,
1- You want to be wanted.
2- You want some thing.
Now sweet heart if you just want to be wanted like a piece of personal property u can lean back because yes ur 2nd choice.
but if u want something and its ur first choice i will suggest to GO GET IT.
CHEERS
2006-12-27 16:54:08 · answer #7 · answered by WiseGuy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forget it for now, especially if you feel like you would resent him. Who knows what will happen in a few years though.
2006-12-27 16:40:20 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you would be second choice and resent him because of it.
Back up and forget about him. It isn't worth the pain and heart ache.
2006-12-27 16:40:06 · answer #9 · answered by SINDY 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just give it some time. If he leaves her it isn't necessarily for you. Just take things slow no matter what. Forget him for now... if down the road he leaves her and wants you then you can cross that bridge when it happens, right?
2006-12-27 16:41:15 · answer #10 · answered by Principessa 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋