I go to school with this guy and I totally fell in love with him. He liked me and even told me on many occasions he loved me, but the problem is he had a g/f of 2.5 yrs. He strongly believes in commitment and dreaded breaking her heart, but he wanted to end it with her to be with me. I told him not to cause I felt like the 3rd wheel, so we continued being friends (and in spite of all we were great friends). He still liked me and we occasionally went out. Suddenly I stopped taking his calls and he is very hurt. I just need him to understand I can't do it anymore and it hurts me. Did I do it the right way? Advice please...
2006-12-27 13:37:49 · 23 answers · asked by shygal 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You did the right thing. If he was unhappy with her he would have broken it off a long time ago. He sounds like he wants to have his cake and eat it too. If he does end up breaking up with her for you would you be with him knowing how easily he falls in and out of love. Do not worry if he is hurt, you are the only one that matters!!!!
2006-12-27 13:45:02 · answer #1 · answered by Darling girl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You were right for stopping the relationship before it got way out of hand. He has a girl-friend and he needs to realize that. What if
that was you and he was going to do that with some other girl, how would you feel when you found out? Your best thing is to love
him and let him go, in the end you will feel much better knowing you will not feel like the third wheel. Nor will you feel like he will ever leave me, for another girl, like he lift his other girl for me? think about it , what he did to her, he''ll do to you. He is still young and not ready to settle down,, he want his cake and eat it too. Just because he was with her 2.5 years don't mean nothing, he can say he strongly believes, but does he really NO, other wise he wouldn't be after you HELLO!!, that just shows he doesn't
strongly believes. Be the stronger person and go find yourself
another guy whom will be with you and only you, not you and
Cindy, patty, Susy. Remember you want the attention on you
not the attention on some other B**CH!!
2006-12-27 21:59:38 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you did Ok and of course he would b hurt if he loved you but u have to realize that If u were with someone and then you new u had found the true one and you told them you wouldnt want them to feel like the third wheel you would break up with the one u like for the one u love and that is what he was trying to do but you nroke it off you really should call him if u feel the same about him and tell him that you are not mad at him just were not sure about things i have been in this situation Hope It all roles over good
e mail me or messange me at Monkey78362@yahoo.com with the results
2006-12-27 21:45:18 · answer #3 · answered by happy_go_lucky 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can't say if it was the right way or not, but I'll bet you know you could have done it better than you did.
When he was ready to change you from being the 3rd wheel to the main squeeze, did you say no for the reason you gave, or did you resist the idea because the sudden change threatened your sense of security?
Most women long for a sign of commitment from their man. When he gave you one, you ran. So what's with that?
You want him to understand what's going on, but you don't have a valid reason available for him, so you came looking for answers here.
You won't find your answers from strangers. That is something you need to look for within yourself.
Cheers!
2006-12-27 21:51:23 · answer #4 · answered by No More 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did the right thing! If he breaks up with someone he's been with for 2 yrs chances are he'll do the same to you after he gets tired of you. I would say continue not to contact him and wait and see what happens if he continues to see his girlfriend cause he doesn't have anything to fall back on then you know his true colors but if he breaks up with her not knowing his status with you then he might be a keeper. This test will let you know what he's truly made of.
2006-12-27 21:49:41 · answer #5 · answered by spirit2 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You did not do anything wrong, there is nothing wrong with comment, but we are talking a bout a dating situation here, not a marriage, if he really likes you, it's time for him to break up with his girlfriend, and not taking his calls, is the smart thing to do. He is hurt???, no, you are a smart girl to back a way, you would just be sitting yourself up for a heartbreak. If he really wants to be with you, he is going to have to make a choice, and it's not much of a comment on his part to keep both of you.
2006-12-27 21:48:07 · answer #6 · answered by Kimberly H 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, if he likes you and wants to break up with his girlfriend for you, I wouldn't do it either. Thats like getting together with some guy that cheated on his girlfriend to be with you. If he wasn't having problems in his relationship before you come along then its not right, so I don't blame you for doing what you did. I would be scared if you did do it because you never know if he would do that to you and break your heart.
2006-12-27 21:51:47 · answer #7 · answered by me_myself 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sounds like you are indeed very hurt. That guy should understand you took a stand and decided what is best for you. If he loves you he'll come back, if not...au revoir baby!
You're a pretty girl shygal (at least that's what the pic shows)!!!!!!
2006-12-27 21:48:02 · answer #8 · answered by robinsonliliana 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did the right thing cause it sems like he was not gonna stop seeing her and perhaps wanted to play games. Hurting sometimes is for the better and one just needs to move on.
2006-12-27 21:42:07 · answer #9 · answered by JoJoBa 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I smell trouble ,he's been going out for 2.5yrs but he tells you he loves you ,you are the 3rd wheel .just remember if they break out because of you ,you will always wonder if he's telling someone else the same words but doesn't want to break your heart.
Question how do you know he's so hurt?Unless you checking on him .
2006-12-27 21:50:13 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋