Should I have a wedding registry?

Question

I am getting married away and having very few people to keep the cost out of my pocket down. I will only be inviting my family and very close friends. My co worker keep suggesting to me to have a wedding registry. They are aware that none of them are invited (not to be rude) but they are aware and she keep telling me about the registry. I don't really feel comfortable with doing it but she is making it seem that I have to. I don't want to seem as though I am ungrateful for the though. How should I handle this situation. HELP

Answer 1

If you're not comfortable with it, don't do it and make your decision clear to your coworker(s). Keep in mind though, that your coworkers will likely want to throw you some sort of party/shower and give you something - she's encouraging you to do a registry because it will make it easier for her and your other coworkers.

There are many ways you can approach this if you don't want to register, but you should address it head-on. You could tell her that you A.) simply don't feel the need to register anywhere since it's a small wedding and/or there's nothing you particularly need, B.) would prefer that if someone wishes to give something, they contribute to a charity, C.) that you'd really rather not receive any gifts, etc. Or you could drop a hint (subtley or not) that there's something particular you'd like if "someone" felt inclined to organize a group gift (ie. gift certificate for a night out/dinner/hotel/spa etc.). This is NOT being greedy; it's acknowledging that the people you work with want to express their happiness at your upcoming marriage, and that many people like to express this in the form of a gift.

Just remember that if you simply say, "No, we're not going to register anywhere," you'll get a few random gifts that may or may not be to your taste. What's the worst that could happen?

Answer 2

This is YOUR wedding so you must do what you are comfortable with. Since this is a smaller wedding you should know how your family and close friends will feel about this. However, I think the wedding registry is a great idea. I also think that you should register with more than one store. The registry should be put in the announcement because a lot of people will not ask. I have received invitations and announcements this way and was not put off by it at all. In fact it was nice because I knew what the bride and groom wanted. Registering at more than one store is good because this way you can give more options, both in prices and types of things you want. Also, not everyone goes to the same stores and not everyone has the same amount of money to spend. Congratulations on your engagement and upcoming wedding! I wish you the best!

Answer 3

It's not really appropriate to have a wedding registry when these people are not invited to the wedding. If a person is not attending the wedding, then gifts are not required or expected. You should just tell people that your wedding is limited to only family and a few very close friends. Therefore you and your fiance have decided it would not be appropriate to have a wedding registry.

Answer 4

People may want to give you a wedding gift even though they understand that your wedding will be small and private.

Don't send out announcements with your registry stores listed....that's just tacky.

Go ahead and register for those that ask you where you are registered. You are not asking for gifts....no one feels forced or obligated in any way.

Answer 5

Those who know you are getting married and want to give you a gift, will try to give you something whether you like it or not. They may opt for cash or giftcards if you don't have a registry, but they might also give things that are more to their personal tastes.

If you do set up a registry, you can help guide friends' purchases, should they feel compelled to give you something. You can also choose lots of small items (at smaller prices) so that there's an opportunity for friends to give you a gift, that they know you would like, without spending a lot of money on it. For that reason, I would recommend having one, but of course it's up to you.

Answer 6

First of all - this is YOUR wedding and you don't have to do anything you don't want to do. Personally, I find the registry really tacky. However, lots of people do it.

If you must, do not EVER put this in your invitations because that is more tackiness that is really pathetic. Instead, do it and when people ask, tell them where you are registered. But don't offer the information unless it is asked.

Answer 7

You do not HAVE to have a registry, but it is nice to see what you need and want instead of hoping you don't have a toaster or a griddle or whatever.

Its up to you. If you don't want to, tell your coworker to leave you alone you are not having a registry.

Answer 8

A new trend in registries is doing a charitable giving registry, like justgive.org or idofoundation.org

Registries are NOT tacky.

Including registry information in the invitation IS tacky.

Answer 9

go ahead and register. people understand that weddings are costly and that you can't invite eveyone. that doesn't mean that they aren't happy for you! people like buying things for there friends at times like these. registering is the only way they will know what you need and want. just send thank you cards, they know that you are greatful.

Answer 10

I think most people find an announcement that a couple is registered at such-and-such store to be very annoying. If you don't really want one, for heaven's sake don't create one.