problem with fiancee?

Question

I have a problem with my fiancee. The thing is that i'm madly in love with her, and she loves me too, but she is a total shrew. Last times we are quarreling all the time, and it gets on my nerves. I do everything what she wants, just because i want to please her, and make her feel as my equal, but she became rude. She considers herself to be a boss in the family. I tried talking with her, but all she says is that i create aproblem which does not exist. I even talked with her friends, and one of them told me that she needed a real man.Well i behave with her like a real man in terms of respect, but i guess she wants different relationships. She always changes the topic when i try talking about it. I do not know what to do. maybe i should try spanking her or smth.like that. Sorry but i do not know what to do! :(

She looks at other men sometimes, making me jealous. I can not dump her because i love her for other good parts of personality she has, but i won't be able to live with her rudeness. She loves me too as she always assists me in a hard time. Once when i tried to dump her she cried a lot. Now when i am with her i feel myself like a boylike slave. I must be the man, but how should i make her realize that she has no right to behave in insulting way with me.Thanks in advance people.
as for me i thought the best way was spanking her, so that i could bring other taste into our relationship and life.I simply need advice from more experienced people.

ok forget the marriage consider her as my mere gf. Breaking up is not the way out. i simply want the advice on how to show her that i'm the boss/

DON'T BE SHY THE MORE ANSWERS I GET AND THE MORE PEOPLE ANSWER- THE BEST IT WILL BE. I'm really thankfull to all of you for your concern. Merry chritmas to you all.

Answer 1

Try this. From what her friend told you I think I know what is going on. Is she a confident, self sufficient women, who can take care of her self? I am willing to bet she runs the show in her work life and is not afraid to tell her friend the way it is. She may also use you as a door mat. DON"T LET YOURSELF B A DOOR MAT. My best advice is to live you life and when she fits in, include her but don't schedual your day around her. She will come around when she sees that you aren't going to follow her around and adore-on-her all day! Some women like a little of a challenge. May sound weird or stupid but it could be true. Also if she gets her way all the time then it becomes expected and kindof boring.

Answer 2

Actually, your ending suggestion, while tongue in cheek, is pretty close to the mark. You've tried everything you could to accommodate her, to please her, to be what you think she wants...and she's lost all respect for you.

You have two choices:

1. Leave her. This will be an attractive choice before she can rob you of half your stuff when you get married.

2. Solve the problem. Stop being a wuss and stand up for yourself. If she starts drama, tell her to stop it. Once. If she keeps doing it, leave the room or kick her out. Don't play her games. Refuse to bend when it's important to you, and don't brook any sort of BS from her. In short, be a man.

It seems absolutely insane that women would want to be treated like this, but I promise you that it works. She doesn't want to be your "equal"; she wants you to take charge. If you sink to her level, she'll just continue to drag you down.

Answer 3

Let her know it's a 50/50 relationship. If she's not willing to listen to you then it's time to get out. You don't have to take that crap. If she really love's you she'll listen, but she knows she's wrong or there's something bothering you and she's blocking it by saying stuff like that to you. You are doing the right thing talking to her. Remember there are plenty of women out there you don't have to put up with that. Good luck!

Answer 4

Don't get married. This is a divorce waiting to happen. She doesn't see a problem. She never will. She has the personality that she does, and you shouldn't expect her to change. You shouldn't change either. So, sit down and talk. It may be better to realize you aren't the ones for each other, and quit while you are ahead.

Answer 5

You need to work this out before you get married, because it sounds like there is already trouble brewing. You should not always be trying to please her and give her what she wants. You are an adult and if you don't agree with her then stand up for yourself. There is no reason she should be the "boss" - you should both be on the same level.

Answer 6

Start treating her like crap. She will respect you more if you don't cow-tow to everything she tells you to do. Would you respect someone who did everything you told them to do? NO! This is the same with her. Start treating her like sh*it. Be unavailable. Be unreliable. Don't hesitate to put her in her place if she gets out of line. Her friends think you're not a real man because you bend to her every need. Start standing up for yourself and you will start to be respected. Women love men who treat them like crap. They are really screwed up in the head. They will do anything to try to please a man who does not give a sh*it about them.

Answer 7

Could be she's trying to provoke you into spanking her. Try it and see what results you get - if her behaviour still doesn't improve, you should probably break off the engagement.

Answer 8

it sounds like your fiancee doesn't respect you....she needs a much firmer kind of guy, one that won't say yes all the time. if she doesn't respect you, there isn't much else holding things together. drop her now before its too late and you find yourself in a loveless marriage with a total *****.

Answer 9

maybe be a lil manlyer if she changes the subjuct dont give up maybe walk out on her one time if things get worst tell her your having second thoughts about the two of you

Answer 10

Leave her. She does not respect you and therefore she can't possibly love you.

Find a woman that is better suited for yourself and find true happiness.