I have 1 sister and 5 brother's in which one was killed before age 16 by a drunk driver.I was as bad as the rest of my sibblings at one time,talking about the other not wanting to be at family gatherings ect.The youngest of us is 46,I had a true reality check 5-4-02,I found out I had heart problems.I was mortified to find out,june 1st 02 I had a quid bypass,after which I have had 4 heart attacks,12 stents.there is nothing in which can be done for me.I never realised how much I needed my family until then,so I pulled a family meeting letting them know I was so sorry about the way I had treated them,and wanted to let them know I forgave them for any thing that they had done,we are family and I wanted to get to know them and them me and us try to be a family,but to my dismay it was a waist of my time as well as theirs.My Mother is 76 and it breaks her heart that we can't all be in one room.it took a reality check for me,I don't have long.is this what it will take for my siblings?
2006-12-27 08:53:42 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You gave your family a wonderful gift- forgiveness. This gift you also gave yourself because you have let all that pain leave you (or at least most it). If this is how your family is, no one's death will change them. Just love them from afar and don't let them hurt you anymore. Enjoy the rest of your life.
2006-12-27 09:05:59 · answer #1 · answered by StormyC 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry for your condition and your family's lack of concern. How about if you write each one a nice letter. Explain how you don't have a lot of time left in your life and you wanted to tell them how much you love them. Explain that now you are older and wiser and are looking death in the eyes that you appreciate the concept of the family much more and regret all the past decisions you have made. Really pour your heart out on these people. If you cannot help them now, then maybe your kind words will help them in the future. You have nothing to lose. You will then have the peace you need. Sometimes it does take a life changing event to see the light. I am trying to make my family less dysfunctional also. I mean, damn, we only have one family and cannot get along. I wish you the best of luck. May you find much more happiness in your next life. God bless.
2006-12-27 09:12:36 · answer #2 · answered by looloo1122 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You and I and many others are in the same boat. Apparently you have done all that one can do to bring a family together. Sometimes family members just don't listen or even take time to think about it.
I'm the oldest of 4, 52 our parents haved passed away. I've tried to pull us together as a family, to include each and everyone of us, but i've failed. I'm sitting her the day after a visit to my doctor knowing my time left here on earth can be measured in a few short weeks, not months and years.
Maybe by the grace of god if we pray for his help (you & I) we will manage to pull our families together before we make our long journey home. God bless you and I will pray that your family unites.
2006-12-27 09:13:00 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, I think you are waisting your time. I have 3 brothers and two sisters (one of which was murdered). My sister is so warped she actually conived, lied and slept with who she had to until she got my brothers kids taken away. She's dating a man who, as she puts it: "looks like her brother from the back and the man who killed her sister from the front" I could go on and on, but lets face it --people change ,their priorities change and no matter how badly we might want to reconcile, it usually just doesn't work.
2006-12-27 09:11:26 · answer #4 · answered by angel1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some of us have the same problem you have. Your not alone and their is nothing you can do. At least you were BIG enough to admit your mistakes. I am truly Sorry but its their loss
2006-12-27 09:06:59 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋