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My so is breaking up with his girlfriend. she is just 16 he will be 18 in feb. they have been such a cute little couple, all of their friends say things like, cutest couple, when are you going to get married...they dont argue or fight.from what my son ha sshared with me , he has just grown apart from her, he is thinking about being 18, maybe leaving for school...but his girlfriend, whom is the sweetest thing in the world, still loves him as much as she can !! my heart breaks for her and my son really hasnt "TOLD" her he has kind of just given her the cold shoulder.. I told him he must talk to her and tell her, he said he didnt know how....... any "SERIOUS" advise for him

2006-12-27 07:38:08 · 9 answers · asked by crazartgirl 4 in Family & Relationships Singles & Dating

9 answers

This is a pivotal moment in your sons life. He needs to conquer his fears and handle this. If he can't, then how will he handle being a boss or a parent in a few years. Doing these hard to do things make us the people we are. If he runs from this ....................

2006-12-27 08:01:28 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

life does change our interest.
What your son should do is write a letter to himself to define what he likes about the girlfriend...for his own good.
Once he realizes her value to him...he will then see why he feels the need to move on.
Women and men mature at different speeds at different times. She was probably more mature than him, but now he senses the opportunity to expand who he is becoming. He won't be able to do that fully with his present girlfriend...
In the discussion with the friend girl, he must express those things he found to be of value when he wrote the note to himself, but he must also express why he feels that a change in their interaction must be experienced for the possible growth of both parties.
the relationship is not going to end (very important), it is only going to change...and the change is always for the better. He doesn't have to give her the cold shoulder, but she does have to provide him the space to become the new person his experiences cause him to be.
the mom can help a great deal with this transistion by adding her own experiences to the conversation.
...
in short. The boy must talk to the girl and explain that he is not leaving her just to be leaving...he is growing and needs the space to grow with her support. If who he becomes is no longer compatible for a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship at least they can maintian their friend/friend relationship. Ask the girl to honor the changes you are experiencing while you honor her by expressing what is going on with you that may affect her. The goal always is to allow expansion and increase joy.

2006-12-27 07:52:24 · answer #2 · answered by therapy4love 1 · 0 0

the main person-friendly reason of that answer, i've got heard, is to stay away from offering intricate element on why they are breaking, to spare the different's thoughts with motives that should come off impolite, and to stay away from available disagreement that should drag out the ordeal (in all probability for the two previous motives I presented). And no, this is in all probability no longer because of the fact she's indecisive and desires a boy to steer her. this is in all probability because of the fact some women persons at the instant are not as forward and as conspicuous as some boys could like. There are widespread adult adult males that do a similar right ingredient, they are basically no longer being continuously mocked on television. So, do no longer subject. all and sundry that makes use of their techniques will attempt to spend time thinking approximately own themes including this. wait and see, no longer pushy. enable her know that in case you could a minimum of be pals which you would be able to help her.

2016-11-23 20:02:25 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

he must tell her that he wants to end the relationship. his heart isn't in it and it has to move on. has nothing to do with her. he should also tell her that the right person will come along and make her happy. not all relationships are meant to be. mom why dont you check out this book in the meantime and journey by iylana vyzant. EXCELLENT BOOKS. if you scheme through them it will help her understand. your son is right! he is not settling. because they are cute together doesn't mean the chemistry is there. he is being real. he should find happiness he is smart and not stuck in the ego world. read about ego vs soulmate google it. when you read all these articles you will begin to see the light like me. If someone doesnt like you make room for the right person to come along. staying in a relationship just for her sake is not fair to HIM.

2006-12-27 07:45:22 · answer #4 · answered by renosgirl2006 4 · 0 0

Your right he has just grown apart from her,its so normal and he does'nt know why or what to do about it.
My daughter did exactly the same thing with her boyfriend,i had to tell her to call him and tell him she'd called it off.He was abit confused as she still liked him,but didn't want him as a boyfriend anymore,anyway several rows later their still not together but they have maintained some sort of friendship.Leave him to it, it will sort itself out.

2006-12-27 07:59:52 · answer #5 · answered by Countess 5 · 0 0

He should simply say it isn't working out and be firm, but gentle, if she tries to persuade him it will. She probably knows there's something wrong if he's giving her the cold shoulder. He should be prepared for her to be upset and possibly angry. Talking to her is the decent, mature thing to do and if he's sure, then it's also kindest to her. Ending it in a 'no blame' way will hopefully soften the blow.

2006-12-27 07:44:45 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

He should tell her what he told you; that he thinks they are growing apart and that he is leaving for school soon and it would be difficult to maintian the relationship.

2006-12-27 07:45:55 · answer #7 · answered by sonyalldy 2 · 0 0

he does need to talk to her and soon. that would be better than treating her poorly for sure. obviously she would be upset, but people do gorw apart.

he just needs to end it with her

2006-12-27 07:42:20 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

I guess the "it's not you, it's me" speech is in order.

2006-12-27 07:41:23 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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