There is a 21 yr old girl I know and she is not allowed to do anything without her parents being around or someone who is a really close family friend. Basically, her only friends are her father's friends and her friends on MSN instant messenger (who are mainly out of the country).
Her father is an instructor at the college she goes to and on the weekends is the coordinator of their church choir. She has no friends at her school by the way. Basically, she is around her father most of the time. Her parents are so protective to the extent that she has never had a boyfriend and has only gone on one date (to the movies) and that was when she was 19. By the way, when she came back from the date that night her parents had thrown her things out of the house!!
I met this girl like 4 months ago and we've been talking about going out. The problem is that her parents are too overprotective and that I stay 1 1/2 hrs away. What can be done about this situation?
2006-12-27 06:46:28 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Eek, talk about some controlling parents. You didn't say the reasons they're so opposed to her dating and having friends (religion? insular ethnic background?), so it's possible you might be able to present your case to the father. However, if that doesn't seem likely, your best bet may be to see her on the sly, hiding the relationship until she graduates.
She's 21, so hopefully in a year or so, she'll be out of college, on her own, and away from her kooky parents, leaving you free to date her openly. That's assuming that she IS planning to get away from them -- if not, you might want to reconsider your romantic options.
2006-12-27 07:02:04 · answer #1 · answered by Blenderhead 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like this girl is in prison or sumtin... It's kind of hard living a life like that... I sorta had to go through the same ish with my parents, but the fact is she still lives in their house and has to abide by their rules. The best thing she can do right now is try to finish up with school and get a good paying job so that she can move out and start living on her own. Her parents may not realize that they are actually doing her more harm than good by keeping her locked up because how can she make it on her own if she's not able to make her own decisions and face her own situations.. make her own mistakes... How the heck can she survive on her own if her parents made her completely dependent on them... I donno wat to tell u guy... but yea... that's a kindda harsh situation
2006-12-27 07:41:08 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She has to build up the courage to strike out on her own. As long as she lives in their home, her parents can make the rules. She may need to wait until she graduates from college until she can support herself, but once she takes hold of her own life and fully pays for her own expenses, she will have all the control.
2006-12-27 06:52:15 · answer #3 · answered by SLWrites 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Man, That is really really really bad! But you know, If I was her, I would stand up for myself, she's 21 and she can do whatever she wishes to do without her parents permission. They can't make her obey them. It sounds like her father is a little too Religious as well, and that is maiking him make those decisions, he needs to have trust in his daughter. I mean, The girl sounds smart enough to know right from wrong and she doesn't need daddy with her to make every decision for her.
2006-12-27 06:54:31 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Regardless of how strict or unreasonable you both may think her parents are...she still lives in their home. If she doesn't like their rules, then she has to move out. If her parents are unwilling to compromise with her and ease up on their rules, she has no other recourse. As unfair as it may seem...their house = their rules. She probably needs to look into a place of her own.
2006-12-27 06:51:22 · answer #5 · answered by Apple21 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is 21 so tell her to move out get a place of her own and start to live her life the way she wants to live it
2006-12-27 06:53:42 · answer #6 · answered by spud 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You already know the parents are strict. You need to speak with the head of the household, and introduce yourself with manners and a non-slang language conversation.. Let them know good things about you, she is 21 but you don't know this family is strictly cultural. Her family needs to know that their daughter is in good hands, good security, with a good gentleman and a man with financial ability. They just don't want their daughter to end up with a loser.
2006-12-27 06:54:30 · answer #7 · answered by LIZA 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she's a grown adult she needs to talk to her parents about their strictness. it sounds like they are denying her a social life, isn't that like some kind of abuse what they're doing? i understand that she lives with them, probably causes she's to afraid to move out. theres nothing really you can do you can suggest that she move out and find her own friends, you can get to know her and parents more and maybe if they saw that you were a good person they would loosen up a bit
2006-12-27 07:03:11 · answer #8 · answered by shellie11985 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She needs to get a job and move outof the house. That will end that problem. She can get a female roommate if she is not making much money.
2006-12-27 07:36:38 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing until she moves out
she lets them continue to stop her it's her decision no can take anyting from you unless you let them
2006-12-27 06:53:17 · answer #10 · answered by cisco_cantu 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋