My girlfriend from college went home for christmas break. She went out with her friends who got her drunk and she kissed some other guy, she assures me it was harmless. I have a tendancy to overreact, so what would be an apporpriate way to deal with this?
2006-12-27 05:56:15 · 38 answers · asked by Tony O 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Tell her it was disrespectful. If she intends on leaving herself open to have physical encounters with other men...then she doesn't have the desire to have a meaningful relationship w/you. Establish a label on the level of your relationship...and then decide..if that is what you want.
2006-12-27 05:58:41 · answer #1 · answered by Win 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Depends.
I would not make a big deal about being drunk and doing things - IF this is the exception and not the rule.
I think she is somewhat immature to get drunk in the first place- and her actions show she is not ready to settle down or anything. But perhaps you are not ready to settle down yet either. Relationships are not always at the same pace or with the same goals at the same times.
Most important is whether you grow together or find your different points you are at in your life are so huge you cannot or do not want to wait for her. I would not make a big deal over it - UNLESS you are all upset on her point she is with the relationship. It could be much worse, or could be a sign of much more bad things - but being drunk is not how you will find out truly where her head is at. Have a serious conversation with her if it bothered you and her answers will be the key to your next move.
2006-12-27 06:05:06 · answer #2 · answered by Kerry Z 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you have a right to be angry with her for kissing someone else. I don't know if it was harmless or not...only you can make that call. I have been really drunk before and yes your inhibitions are gone. However, I totally knew what was going on when I was drunk. If this is the first time this has ever happened and you don't think she will do it again I would forgive her. If this is a pattern or you believe that it could possibly happen again then I suggest you move on. Good Luck!
2006-12-27 06:02:12 · answer #3 · answered by Michelle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she's your girlfriend, and deep down you really care about her, you may want to first address the out of control drinking. Next time, it may not just be a kiss...........she may go all the way, or something worst. Secondly, talk with her and if you can see in her eyes that she didn't mean it, it was because she's drunk, just know that it happens, forgive and move on.
2006-12-27 05:59:52 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's normal to be jealous but don't worry about it and let it go. At least she was honest with you and told you that it was harmless which I'm sure it was and meant nothing. When people drink they tend to do things they wouldn't normally do or would never do when they are sober. So don't worry about it. I'm sure she feels worse about it than you do.
2006-12-27 06:12:57 · answer #5 · answered by T.K. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you give an inch, they take a mile. next it'll be a hand job that is harmless. simply ask her if you did it would it bother her? if she says no, then say "thanks, I'll consider that next time", if she says yes then the point is made. either way the right thing surfaces. you have every right to be disappointed. people's first, and most natural reaction is the most accurate. trust that instinct and you'll always steer clear of troublesome situations in life! good luck!
2006-12-27 06:03:14 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, her friends didn't get her drunk. I'm pretty sure she was in control of that! If it was just a kiss though, and she was honest with you about it--I would let it go...but only once. If it happens again, you should think twice about being with her.
2006-12-27 05:59:09 · answer #7 · answered by ANGEL 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I really won't make it out to be more than it is....at least she told you which means she feels guilty.
Make her suffer a bit though...so it doesn't happen again....like don't talk to her for a few days, express you disappointment, blah blah blah.
But do it calmly with a bit of hurt in your voice...ya know what i'm saying. Make her feel a little bit more guilty...that way she'll think twice before she does it again.
2006-12-27 06:01:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I´d dump her. Loyalty is the basis of a secure relationship, drunk or not she knew it wasn´t right, she was prepared to accept the cicumstances and went ahead.
2006-12-27 06:01:09 · answer #9 · answered by Ganymede 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you should be mad because she kissed another guy but she was under the influence so you should tell her that you feel uncomfortable because she kissed another guy even if it was harmless because sometimes when you're drunk your true feelings come out
2006-12-27 05:59:59 · answer #10 · answered by Rivelle W 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋