Jock finds himself in dire trouble. His business has gone bust and he's in serious financial problems. He's so desperate that he decides to ask God for help. "God, please help me. Ah've lost ma wee store and if Ah dinna get some money, Ah'm going to lose my hoose too. Please let me win the lottery!" Lottery night! Someone else wins... Jock prays again. "God, please let me win the lottery! Ah've lost my wee store, ma hoose and Ah'm going to lose ma car as weel!" Lottery night again! Still no luck... Jock prays again.
"Ah've lost ma business, ma hoose and ma car. Ma bairns
are starving. Ah dinna often ask Ye for help and Ah have
always been a good servant to Ye. PLEASE just let me win
the lottery this one time so Ah can get back on ma feet!"
Suddenly there is a blinding flash as the heavens open and
the voice of God Himself thunders:
"Jock at least meet Me half way and buy a ticket!"
2006-12-26 22:57:38 · 33 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
THanx for a great laugh and 2points
2006-12-27 02:18:25 · answer #1 · answered by Dragon Boy 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
its an old un but the old uns are always funny, heres a similar story
Jake the jew is kneeling up at the alter, when the priest walks into church & hears him preying
Jake says God bless Adolf Hitler
God Bless Himler
God Bless Gurbolls
& God Bless The S S
The priest walks over to Jakey & asks Why he wants God to bless such evil men
Jake replies I won the lottery rollover last night
The priest says, so why the prayer for those evil people
Jakey replies They gave me the numbers.
2006-12-27 00:08:50 · answer #2 · answered by Because I Said So 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Funny
2006-12-26 23:11:13 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is good one reminds me of meself,i always want to win the lottery but i never buy the ticket,i should go and buy one if i touch lucky will you be my friend just to make me smile all the time.and we will pay people to laugh how's that sound to you honey.not a bad idea.
i would pay people to smile 1st then i'd buy them to laugh.
2006-12-27 01:37:05 · answer #4 · answered by mariolla oneill 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
An oldie but a goodie...have you seen my lottery tkt???? Where did I put the blasted thing!
2006-12-26 23:03:22 · answer #5 · answered by Star 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
short arms and long pockets came to mind 10/10
2006-12-27 21:20:39 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
not worth the punch line realy, very lame. I'm sorry
2 outa 12. keep it up tho. I got lame jokes too.
2006-12-26 23:15:52 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Funnier than my not funny ones, but really not a comparison that you should be aiming for!
2006-12-27 03:23:21 · answer #8 · answered by Alex 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's funny
2006-12-27 05:44:32 · answer #9 · answered by ~*simtoria lové y ashley~* 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yep we are all as tight as a ducks a**se and its water tight 10/10
2006-12-27 00:28:01 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋