My father and mother seperated when I was ten. Then, my father passed away, and my grandmother didn't treat my mother very well. I have aunties and uncles who kept in contact, and I don't believe they're evil people. They tell me they want to get to know me and my sister and I are welcome anytime. I want the chance to know my blood family on my dad's side. Is this betraying my mother? She told me I'm not welcome back if I ever visit them.
2006-12-26 20:52:53 · 7 answers · asked by verygirlygirl 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
<>First off, no- it's not wrong for you to want to get to know ALL of your family. You should decide for yourself who you like and don't like. Even though she may have good reasons in her own mind, it is wrong of your mother to threaten you that way. You should sit down with your mother and ask her why she feels the way she does, then explain to her that you need to find out for yourself.
2006-12-26 20:54:43 · answer #1 · answered by druid 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Boy did your question here hit home with me in more ways
then one. I firmly believe your mother is wrong in expressing her feelings about her in laws to you in such a way AND by making you decide between knowing them and loving her. You are NOT betraying her love dear but learning about your other family. Which is your family. I can bet there was a fight over this between your fathers mother and her. That's when she cut off the contact.
What happened between your mother and father should have stayed between them NOT involve you children or other members in the family.
Your gaining precious family history by coming to know your fathers side, heck by coming to know your grandmother.
Every Grandmother deserves to KNOW their grandchildren and a chance to love them. Don't let some fight THEY had interfere in the time you can have with her.
Sure your mom might be mad for awhile BUT when she comes to understand just why you want to know your "FAMILY" and that you will not stop loving her she will come around
All the Best to you in this ...
2006-12-26 21:12:41 · answer #2 · answered by MrsDave 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The beef is between your grandma/mom, you children should not be involved in anything. That is your mother's version maybe of trying to brain wash you into believing this?
Do what is in your heart, follow your heart and you will never go wrong. Life has choices, you should be able to decide on your own.
Maybe she just kept you away from your grandma because of unresolved differences between them. However, their differences has got nothing to do with you.
You can meet them and decide on your own whether you want to keep in touch with them. I have a late brother, I love his children dearly!
2006-12-26 21:38:35 · answer #3 · answered by Emily L 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your mother should have thought about all this before she had kids. You have a right to get to know your family. Its only right. What ever the problem there was, it wasn't your fault and don't feel bad. Your mom will get over it. Do what you think is right. Good luck!!
2006-12-26 20:59:20 · answer #4 · answered by deborah_012003 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. Your mother needs to understand that if her in-laws want to keep in touch with her grandchildren, then they should be able to...Whatever your mother and grandmother had against each other, is between them and only them...Who know's maybe your mother and grandmother can respect each other now that they want to be in your lives...Maybe you should try talking to your mom, it would't hurt...
2006-12-26 20:58:56 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no you need to know your whole family
2006-12-26 20:55:02 · answer #6 · answered by knowlegeSeeker 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
What she doesn't know won't hurt her.
2006-12-26 21:02:38 · answer #7 · answered by tbonz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋