I have only been on a handful of dates in my lifetime but I was recently introduced to a guy that is ridiculously appealing to me. He's handsome and extremely well manered--just hanging out with him turns me on like crazy. I try too keep my cool but at the end of our first date I kissed his cheek and gave him a hug since I was pretty sure he wouldn't kiss me. On the second I again gave him a hug and kissed his cheek, but I also told him I thought he was really cute, to which he replied that he thought I was too. Still no kiss. I was afraid that during the date I came off as uninterested so I really wanted to let him know how I felt as he is only in town for a few weeks. He said he would call but now I'm left wondering--could I have come on too strong? I don't know much about this whole dating thing but I really wanted to give him the "go ahead" and though he might just be too well-manered to try anything on me. Did I do something wrong? Is this something I should avoid doing?
2006-12-26 15:37:48 · 10 answers · asked by bluebutterfly081 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I told him I wanted to hang out for New Years if he has no other plans and he said maybe we can get some friends together. Assuming I have not scared the guy away, if we hang out with friends, should I ask him for a New Year's kiss, just kiss him, or do nothing?
2006-12-27 01:07:22 · update #1
tell any guy u date wat the deal is so they dont toe ur boundaries and u dont get put into a bad situation
u call him and tell wats up with u and dont think to much about wat u shld do around him just be urself dont force urself on him
2006-12-26 15:40:53 · answer #1 · answered by leandrasmiles 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think with no kiss on the second date, it gave him the signal that you want to go slow. On date three, I would kiss him...small pecks. If he increases this kiss (meaning he wants to move forward) I would back away, but slowly.
I would not tell him about saving yourself unless the relationship progresses for another month. It's a very private deal and you don't want to come across as putting the 'fence' up so soon.
Kissing doesn't automatically lead to sex, especially if you haven't known the person long. Even guys know this. I would just keep seeing him, and if things progress and the sex talk comes up - tell him "hey, ya know, I'm kinda saving myself for a long-term relationship. But, it's not really a big deal or anything....just a personal choice." if he cares, he'll understand.
2006-12-26 23:46:36 · answer #2 · answered by Mintygoodness1 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be real with yourself and with him. First of all, if you've waited this long, don't just give it up to any ol' Tom or Hairy Dick. Second, don't stress. Maybe he really is respectful and don't want to come on too strong for you.
Chill out. Talk to him. Get to know him first. You never know, he may have some disease and is trying to refraine from passing it. (Okay maybe not, but you're putting too much into it.)
Chillax a little. Have some more dates. You may learn that he's not big on kissing. Besides. If you keep pushing him you may get more than you're ready for.
2006-12-26 23:44:11 · answer #3 · answered by ghanstabytch 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could just try being honest with the guy. If your'e looking for a long term relationship and you are really attracted to him, it couldn't hurt. Either he's into you or he's not, but at least you aren't wasting your time. Oh, and how do you keep your cool? When the time is right you'll know , otherwise just let him know you'll go so far and that's it. That way he doesn't feel cheated or think that you are just a tease.
2006-12-26 23:46:42 · answer #4 · answered by angel1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you didn't come on too strong at all - it's not like you kissed him on the mouth or anything like that. But you should go on more dates - the more dates you go on, the less likely you are to fall head over heels for every guy on the first date.
Also you should masturbate ["play with yourself"] before you go out - since you'll already be sexually satisfied before you see the guy, you'll be less likely to come on strong when you're on the date.
Good luck!
2006-12-26 23:42:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with Peace's answer. Open and honest communication is the key.
If you are really worried about getting too heated up on dates, you should 'unload the gun' before you go out on a date with him. [feel free to email me if you don't understand this]
2006-12-26 23:42:44 · answer #6 · answered by Johnny Q. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if hes leaving u really like him and r sure hes leaving then go for it hes a guy no such thing as coming on to strong to a single guy(he is single aint he) btw good answer peace
2006-12-26 23:41:29 · answer #7 · answered by wickedly 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Not at all! And if I were you, I would go in for the kiss!
2006-12-26 23:39:55 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sorry I got lost midway, but yea just keep ur cool, and try to keep it locked until the time is right...
2006-12-26 23:42:21 · answer #9 · answered by violet83 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Don't play too hard to get..
Kiss him with passion...
Allow him to fondle you intimately...
Fondle him back..
You may consider participating in oral sex...
Let him know how far he is free to go
and that you are saving virginity for your
wedding night.
2006-12-26 23:42:33 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋