If your kid's been hospitalized for suicide attempts...?

Question

What is it that you're going to think when they come to you and tell you their considering a third go?

How do you react?

What if it's while you're having an argument with them?

Does that change weather or not you beleive them?

Hypothetical question, and either way, I'm a "kid" asking for an adult point of veiw, because it seems that all the adults have gone retarded and assume when a teen says "I'm gonna kill myself" or anything to that effect they're just begging for attention, because there's nothing in this traumatic time in life that could push someone that far, right?

Not:
rape
abusive relationships
addiction
neglect
moving just a little too late to make a fresh start
being stabbed in the back like whoa
expulsion
breakups *however mundane they may seem later, losing your first love to a pregnant oompa-loompa who was your friend hurts*
being treated different because you look different than the standard in an area

Need I go on?

Yeah, we're all just after attention, no matter what the curcumstances or history.

I've been booked, twice, 3days at a time. Why only three days? I wanted out an I'm smart enough to appear sane to even the trained eye. Bide the time when I'm there, once I'm out ponder the best way to do it and not worry about failure.

It's not dieing most of us are afraid of, it's failing and being locked up for having a life that sucks so horribly.

Being in the crisis care unit has saved my life so far, sure. But that's mostly because I can't buy let alone afford a gun.

Answer 1

If your child tells you they are thinking of suicide you should take them seriously NO MATTER what context it is on or what their past experiences are, ESPECIALLY if they have done it before. If they've don't it before you know they can do it again

How would you feel if you didn't take them seriously and they succeeded in committing suicide this time around and you didn't do anything to stop them?

Answer 2

Bring him/her to a counselor or the CAT team at the ER immediately. Obviously, the child is suffering greatly. She may need to go to a hospital, and long-term care should be set in place before she returns home. This is serious! Ignoring a child would be the most horrible thing I can imagine, and most especially when they have twice before made attempts. To pay no attention to a child in pain and pretend you don't care is abandonment. Trust me, calling their bluff will not work.

To: ASHLEY W. - Thank you for writing as you did. You are a brilliant writer and an incredibly smart girl. I haven't heard anyone explain the plight of teenagers today nearly as well as you have. I am so glad you're alive and in therapy. It is sickening how people judge the youth of today, the media is appalling in its hunt for "bad kids", and parents seem to be doing the exact same they were doing years ago and yet complaining as their parents complained about their generation. I am so sorry you have to go through that. I am 32 now, and disgusted by the fact that everyone lumps teens together into one awful category. There are just as many wonderful kids out there as ever, but generation after generation people believe their kids are far worse than they were because they were "beaten enough" or some such garbage. It was lovely to read your take on it. I think perhaps you should make it a school essay. More teens your age should know that someone like you is on their side. I wish you the best of luck and a wonderful life!

Answer 3

You have to take any call for help seriously because even if it's a girl/boy crying wolf, the child (yes teenagers are children) is still crying.
I think you should go to counseling to figure out what you've done to make your child so unhappy and I think you should fork over the dough for your child to see a therapist twice weekly.
Family counseling seems to be necessary as well.
So I'm talking a total of 4 visits to therapists each week and your child might stop saying this and you might figure out why you instigate this sort of behavior in your child.
Sincerely best wishes.

Actually, I figured you were a teenager pretending to ask from a parent's point of view (in both questions).
And I do feel that your parents are probably quite responsible for how you feel right now.
And if you are suicidal, you need to commit yourself. Can you go to a nice facility?
Also, again, the twice or thrice weekly therapy sessions would do you a lot of good.

Answer 4

You're tiring. You simply want people who will agree with you and coddle you.

You think that anyone that gives you an answer other than what you're looking for doesn't understand you or what you're going through. You wouldn't believe all of the stuff I've gone through in my life and am still facing, all of the personal tragedies and hardships as well as the ones I've gone through with other people.

The difference between you and I is that even though I've felt at times things are at a point where a release from life seems it would be the only release available, I'm not that selfish or that much of a coward. I don't hold people hostage with a "You better treat me right and be careful what you say and do around me, or I might not be able to help myself and I'll commit suicide" attitude.

Life isn't just about you, and it doesn't only happen to you. You are a part of other people as much as they are a part of you. What you do affects them, not just you. They also have their own lives and with their own set of problems, and they have other people connected to them other than you.

Quit pretending other people's actions determine your choice of whether or not you commit suicide. You are ultimately responsible for any choices you make. You might not have choices at times between something good and something bad, but rather between something bad and something worse. You might like those situations and feel since you don't have any good choices then you are left with no choices, but that isn't true. Picking the action which does the least harm and living with it, LIVING WITH IT, takes strength and an unselfish attitude, or at least a less selfish attitude. So stop being a coward and so selfish. Stop trying to have people pussyfoot around you because you are lacking and wish to remain that way. Stop trying to get people's approval to continue with the path you are choosing.

BTW people, she's talking about herself. She's the kid, she's just posing the question in the third person so she sounds like she's talking about someone else.

You are 17 and you've made two "attempts", the first being when you were 15. The failure of the first might be chalked up to naivete, that you didn't know how to successfully pull it off. But not the second one. If you had truly wanted to die you would have been able to plan it so that the method would be effective and there would be no hope for rescue, at least not in time to make a difference. The "attempt" IS an attention seeker and/or a way to make someone(s) feel guilty and/or a tool to use to get your way. People who intend to kill themselves don't tend to announce it beforehand, thereby giving someone the opportunity to prevent it. They only announce it and then make an "attempt" that they feel will fail if they aren't getting the attention, guilt or power over others that they were striving for. And then the only times those "attempts" tend to actually succeed is when they've miscalculated the method or rescue response. So their attempt to make a near-suicide ends up being an actual suicide.

You want people to feed your behaviour by throwing pity and reassurances your way, which is why you come here to talk about it, hoping to use their responses as weapons when speaking to your mother and others. Too bad you can't add mine to the pile you're making.

Quite frankly, if I was your mother or any other adult in your life, I would tell you that I don't negotiate with terrorists. This is what your tactics amount to, terrorism. If you can't sit down and discuss your problems and troubles, if your solution is to hold them hostage to threats (or "warnings" as you put it) of suicide, especially at your age, then you are creating an environment of negativity and hostility at the forefront, and you and you alone are responsible for the outcome this brings about.

Answer 5

i think of that query has many colorings! What if a mom, with submit natal melancholy, leaves the youngsters with hubby and is going strolling down a street someplace in the desire of ending all of it. She's residing in a foggy horrendous dream, she is conscious she could adore her teenagers, yet a severe and scientific difficulty is combating her from doing it how she constantly dreamed. could we take her infants off her? this is surely going to variety her out? Oh no, dangle on, then she'll flow out and do a greater effective interest of it, and end it prepared on beneficial. those mothers do no longer desire punishment, they desire help, they are not being self indulgent, because of the fact they do no longer additionally be attentive to they're in the international 0.5 of the time. some do no longer think of to dress, brush their hair etc, so severe is the difficulty. What if a mom looses her husband or mom, or same such, and is so unbelievably depressed she acts with out questioning? would not it instruct a huge flaw in human nature if we punish those damaging women human beings? the place is their help community? of path they could shop their infants, now and returned, those infants are all this is preserving those women human beings in this international!

Answer 6

First off, my comment is this: LIFE IS WORTH LIVING.
Imagine what you would miss - the improvement of your life and the joy you will find once that happens.

Secondly, if you are considering suicide or even finding yourself planning it, then you need help. If you didn't find that the places you were helped you, then keep looking until you find one that does. YOU ARE WORTH IT. YOUR LIFE IS WORTH IT.

Thirdly, imagine all of the people that will be hurt if you killed yourself. Forget those people that HURT YOU. If you don't like how they make you feel, imagine how you will make OTHERS feel when you take such a drastic action.

Finally, know this. The Lord loves you with all his heart. He knew you from the time you were formed in your mother's womb. The bible tells us so. He wants you to have a joyous life here, and He can help you do that. Pick up the bible and read Matthew, and see what Jesus did so that you might have life.

From a personal standpoint, I have seen the destruction of suicide on people's lives. It is truly a coward's way out, and I can tell from your post that you are not a coward. My husband's father committed suicide and it resulted in the total destruction of the family. My stepdaughter's uncle committed suicide, and two years later their mom (his sister) committed suicide. It has destroyed my stepdaughters to the very depths of their souls.

It will NOT bring you peace. And it will not hurt those who have hurt you. They won't feel the pain. Believe me, it will be the good ones that do.

Please call 1-800-SUICIDE which is the national suicide prevention hotline. There are people there who can help you, and who WANT to help you. That's 1-800-784-2433. May God bless you during this difficult time, and help you to know that your life is worth living, and that there are people out there who love you and care about you and want you to live.

BTW - there are also great churches out there who can help. I don't know where you live, but if you go here: http://maps.calvarychapel.com/churchlistbystate.cfm you can find a Calvary Chapel church near you. They are a phenomenal church full of normal, loving, caring people who will jump all over themselves to help you. God bless.

Answer 7

You need to seek professional help for your child and you as well. i have been through the same stuff and it is very hard on the entire family. First of all it sounds like you are both suffering from depression and depression is an illness that needs to be treated for because depression kills. See a Family therapist or go to a psychiatrist and get help soon. Do not ignore it...that's neglect.Good luck.

Answer 8

I would be very shocked. I would feel very bad as a parent, but know that it is not my fault. If I was arguing, then I would definitly make up. I would spend time trying to tell them how much I love them, but throughout their entire life, I would make sure to tell them I love them, listen to what they want and need, and put them first. I would always believe them. Even though sometimes kids get on high horses, there is no reason to lie about something as serious like that.

Answer 9

We don't need all the gory details
and the trauma and the drama.
You are suffering from depression,
and low self esteem. If it's so bad,
you need to go to a doctor and
get the right meds. not be locked up.
The right meds can help you get
your head on straight. Then it's
all up to you. You have to want to
make a life for yourself.
Get busy living, or get busy dieing.

Answer 10

My best friends brother killed himself, I was the last one to see him alive, two hours before he blew his brains out, and I had no idea that he was in this state of mind. Suicide is an act of desperation usually because the individual is in pain and has no idea how to cope. I hope to hell that someone who has had two attempts can find someone who will listen and help and not preach or just say "put them in therapy", didn't we have friends who did this before we entered into the therapist era? Even parents can be friends can't they? I hope my kids can use me as a friend if they ever feel this way.

Answer 11

No it doesn't change anything except for the prabability they will do it increases! I tried to comit suicide last year the day before my birthday. Me and my mom were fighting. we never get along and she told me that i was a mistake and that she wished i was dead and told me to get out that she didn't want me. I took 22 pills of something extremely dangerous and i slit my rists 12 times because thats how old i was. Parents do more damage to their kids than they know. If you and your husband fight or are getting divorced then whether you know it or not it hurts your kids more than it does yall. Being a teenager is harder than ever now. Were always being criticized, asked questions, were never being trusted, all we ever here is were sending the world to hell, that our generation has no values and we stand for nothing, our music is a sin, but yet everybody says we have no reason to try and kill ourselves. We feel like we have the whole world sitting on our shoulders pushing us down! Give your child space. I cut my self to feel as much pain as i felt in my heart. With every cut i felt like i was relieving pressure. Get a therapist and let your child go in by his or herself. It really helped. I could tell my therapists anything and evrything that was goin on and it really helped to talk to someone that wouldn't judge who would just help me. Don't think that your child can just do that with you because he/she can't. There are barriers that kids don't feel comfortable with their parents and parents tend to judge and do more damage than they fix. Without realizing, parents judge and make things worse on their kids. I know you don't mean to and it might be hard to face the music but you have to. For your child's sake!