My 3 1/2 year old son ALWAYS cries/whines when he doesn't get his way and has a really hard time sharing his toys, especially with our 16 month old son. And every time he crys I get down to his eye level and repeat, "I can't help you until you use your words" and it never gets through to him until I am yelling it to him, which I hate to do. Is there anything I can do to make him stop crying and start talking? I am finding this rather embarrassing at preschool functions, the park, or even the store.
2006-12-26 14:47:33 · 7 answers · asked by nicole 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
It sounds like your 3 year old is doing a lot of it to get attention, and yelling is attention.
Put him in his room until he stops crying and can talk nicely. If he starts the whining, again, put him in his room.
Don't be embarassed, we all went through it. I must admit, I sometimes find it aggravating to listen to crying or whining kids, but I get angry when I see Mom's giving in, because I know that the kids will get worse.
Also, one thing used to do to my son, was read him the riot act, as I called it, before any activities. I told him what behavior I expected from him.
I would tell him crying, running around, asking for whatever is not acceptable. When the activity was over, good behavior always got plenty of good attention, kisses, hugs, extra cuddling and reading time. My parents, who are very difficult to please, frequently commented on his behavior and in a good way.
2006-12-26 14:58:59 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
He's crying to take the attention away from the little one. Make him feel like the Big Boy by making him feel indespensible and important. Say it in words that he will understand. Totally Ignore Bad Behaviour. This is the most difficult but crucial part (unless its dangerous of course). Only reward good behaviour.He also needs his time that he had with you before the baby came. He remembers that. Make him feel special. Good Luck
2006-12-26 14:57:58 · answer #2 · answered by kosmikgirl05 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
consistent with danger a bypass to to the Pediatrician to determine there are no longer any scientific issues. consistent with danger you could play music on an identical time as on a thank you to preschool to decrease the stress point. consistent with danger she would be able to tell you if she's dissatisfied approximately something. you do no longer choose for the be conscious punish on your e book! self-discipline is distinctive. consistent with danger she is irritating, and found out a thank you to push your buttons, and consistent with danger you could cool down till now telling her. Your calm voice is the main suitable ingredient she would be able to ever hear. i've got faith it somewhat is going to bypass, offering she has no scientific issues. are you able to ask the preschool if others have this subject? consistent with danger they'd inform you what works, different than attempting to stay as calm as achievable. Then she would be able to't push your buttons. do no longer subject, after she stops this, she would be able to discover yet another button to push to objective to regulate you. She actual needs your interest, and that's ok too! She loves you, and that i undergo in suggestions a narrative of while a clean toddler replaced into placed on the "mom movie actress's abdomen" for the 1st time.....the little toddler tinkled throughout her, and he or she glowed that the toddler gave her all she had to furnish interior the international". Now that's an extremely, delicate, loving concept!
2016-10-19 00:41:01 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is he not hearing you because he never stops to take a breath between cries and whines? I generally have to wait for my 3 year old to take a breath and stop screaming before she even hears me, and then it's my only shot to say something. I think your technique is perfect and only time/aging will help him grow out of it.
2006-12-26 14:53:45 · answer #4 · answered by amy23 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
don't pull that 'big boy' baloney on him. he knows he's not a big boy - that is unfair and way too much pressure. let him be himself.
number one - he is too young for preschool, so he has too much stress in his life. number two, he has been dethroned from his position as your baby at way too young an age for him to cope well with it. third, you don't empathize with him, you reject him when he expresses himself. fourth, he is way too young to be expected to share - especially with the child who dethroned him.
all in all, you have set it up so that his stress, unhappiness, and lack of understanding from mom make it virtually imposssible for him to do better. shame on you for being embarrassed. you are utterly lacking in empathy for your child. what did you do, put him in day care? (that ruins parents empathy for their children.)
you teach him how to use words by saying when he cries - you are really sad or you really want that or you really wish you could have it. if you aren't teaching him how to use words, then he is just getting one more age-inappropriate demand from you.
it's a wonder he's not crying all the time.
take him out of preschool, especially out of day care if you are doing that foolishness, spend time with him on his terms 15 minutes of every waking hour. don't judge, don't criticize. play, ask questions, complement, and teach him how to use his words.
and don't ever yell at a little kid. how abusive is that? very.
please read the book How To Talk So Kids Will Listen and get a clue.
2006-12-26 15:05:43 · answer #5 · answered by cassandra 6 · 0⤊ 3⤋
patience is the only thing you can use...my almost 2 year old daughter is the same. so i just ask her and wait till she gets tired of crying and actually bring me, or point to , or say what she needs
2006-12-26 14:52:52 · answer #6 · answered by babydesyblue 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My kids gets counted (1,2,3) for whining and gets punsihed for it. I have 0 tolerance for whining. could never stand it personally
2006-12-26 14:57:25 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋