I feel like Im losing my mind. I like a guy who has a lot of red flags.
I should be running away screaming. We havent had sex yet but I know he wants to badly.
But he talks about very kinky twisted fantasies. Too much about pain/forced @nal and 'fake' rape. Ive told him how Im not that kinda girly. Im no prude but why talk that way when we havent had sex yet ?
I want to break it off because my gut says he's a freak.
But the best I could do was tell him I cant see him and am scared of him right now.
He got angry/hurt acting with me last night when he heard this and his temper scares me. Acted like a I ruined his Christmas.
Why can't I break it off with him ? In my mind I still might see him again some day.
Part of me feels like we could make each other happy, but the other part of me sees him killing me in a fit of rage.
We're both 30 yrs old and one of us should know better.
Should I keep up my resolve to have no further contact ?
2006-12-26 12:45:25 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Please don't walk away. Run away!!!! Stay away!!!
2006-12-26 12:48:49 · answer #1 · answered by Sasi D 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You refer to him as 'scary guy', I think you've answered your own question here. If you don't want to see someone, don't, it's that simple. You need someone who makes you feel secure, and apart from the rape fantasies and the fact he was very immature and manipulative when you broke up with him, you also say your gut says he's a freak. You seem like you're one of those people who feels guilty about breaking up with people (which you shouldn't) because of this it will only get harder to break things off, just make a clean break, he's not for you.
2006-12-26 12:51:56 · answer #2 · answered by Libby p 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why are you even asking this question? Break it off. You obviously have no interest in those type of fantasies. It's very hard for two people who have opposite views of fetishes to connect THAT WAY. He probably needs to find some one who shares those interests..while you on the other hand, need to find someone who is not so immature...ruined his christmas??? how bizzare is it for a 30 y r old to get in a huff over that?
2006-12-26 12:50:27 · answer #3 · answered by Shugsmom 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie, wake up and get out your girlie balls. Remember, you cannot "make" anyone happy or anything else, nor they you...each of us chooses to be happy or not. You are not currently happy...WHY would you spend time with someone you fear? What is the appeal to you of the 'danger' in this situation? What is your life lacking elsewhere, that this is feeding?
Go with your gut. I can't believe you'd even need to ask strangers about what to do here. You know what you should do...but it's still completely up to you.
There's a reason you're afraid...don't ignore that.
2006-12-26 12:49:27 · answer #4 · answered by . 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes, definitely leave him if hes scaring u. if he acts all butthurt and tries to hurt u call the cops. um honey dear: hes scaring u. DUH u should leave him. keep ur resolve!!!! i was in a situation where i wanted to take some1 back, just cuz they were like a bro to me and i didnt wanna hurt him, but he SCARED ME and i knew it would be better for the both of us if i didnt. this sounds the same. he has 2 learn that he cant always have what he wants, and he has to learn that he cant scare women and get away with it. punch that mofo in the face and move on. GET AWAY FROM THE CREEP. now. tell him 2 crawl into a fridge and stay there. with a bag over his pervy head.
2006-12-26 12:51:48 · answer #5 · answered by ~*[{BasKeT CasE}]*~ 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you're able to attempt denying her ex the attention and marvel that he so desperately craves. now and returned the terrific reaction to a difficulty like this is to no longer respond in any respect. i'm no longer cellular telephone savy, yet I think of there may be the thank you to the two block his calls, or have the quantity replaced. Sending him threats shouldn't remedy something different that turn this right into a celebrity-calling fiasco, and galvanize him added, that's in all threat what he's after. locate the thank you to dam the calls, flow on approximately your employer, and refuse to furnish him the time of day.
2016-10-28 10:37:30 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hun,
This guy is way over controlling and sociopathic. I would get a freaking restraining order, and dump him.
Change your locks,take different routes to work, do whatever you can to stay away from him.
He sounds like a person that could break at any given moment.
Take care of yourself.
God Bless you.
2006-12-26 12:50:05 · answer #7 · answered by Ashley 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should keep your resolve for certain.Lots of women stay with men that throw up red flags were they should know better they are the ones you read about being beat up or worse if you know what I mean.You need to stay away from this guy and find someone else.There are lots of guys in this world who will respect you and not want you to live his fantises if you are not up to that kind of thing.So don't be one of the ones we read about and don't think twice about dumping him.Good Luck
2006-12-26 12:54:26 · answer #8 · answered by sparky75us 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to take a piece of paper and list on one side the things that you admire and on the other the things you fear about him and a relationship. You might even go to handwriting wizard.com and you can compare his handwriting there, if you have a sample of it, but the bottom line is to follow your gut feeling. If he does make too much of it and you really are afraid, consider a restraining order. cemetaries are full of women who waited too long to distance themselves between people they know that they should run from!!
2006-12-26 12:51:56 · answer #9 · answered by Al B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen to your intuition - it is there to protect you from situations like this.
Leave the scary guy and don't look back. His violent fantasies and raging tempers are serious flags, as you said, and should be taken seriously.
2006-12-26 12:56:59 · answer #10 · answered by Contessa 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think the dude has watched too much freaky TV shows.....
Just tell him to show u respect if he wants to continue to see u.
If he apologizes, give him a chance, but if that temper flares up again, drop him flat, it aint worth livin with.
2006-12-26 12:49:18 · answer #11 · answered by sunflare63 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋