I'm 27 and I've never had sex because I've never really felt the urge to. Now, all of a sudden, I've met this guy who I am incredibly attracted to. We get along just fine and the chemistry is incredible and all I can do is think about sleeping with him. It's really interesting to know what "horny" feels like!
Ideally though, I would want to be in a committed relationship with this guy, but I don't think either of us is ready. I am willing to forgo the possibility of a relationship, but I can't pass up the possibility of sleeping with him. I keep thinking "there's no time like the present" and it is driving me nuts. If he’s the only man I sleep with once, I’ll be just fine.
I don’t masturbate or use toys (just doesn't work for me). I need his touch. (help!). How should I approach him on this topic without scaring him away or making him think I’m easy?
2006-12-26 11:33:25 · 35 answers · asked by Krysta 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Okay... so this guy and I have fooled around in the past and it was very intimate. Before that, we dated a few times... for those who are wondering. There is chemistry between us.
2006-12-26 11:50:20 · update #1
You've waited until you are 27, I think you can wait a little longer. Save it for someone you can be serious about, save it for marriage. But if you just can't or don't want to, then just approach him, tell him you want him to be your first, no commitment or emotional attachments necessary. Just don't be upset when the commitment or emotional attachments aren't there. It's a huge responsibility being the first man to take a woman's virginity, some guys would shy away from it, so again, don't be disappointed if he turns you down flat or does it but then disappears. Great se.x is great, but the emotional responsibility that goes along with it is also great - just be sure you can handle it. Good luck.
2006-12-26 11:40:47 · answer #1 · answered by Brandy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not ready for sex if this is the first time you have felt horny in 27 years.
Just what would make you (or him) "ready" to be in a committed relationship? What part of your life is going to suddenly click and make you "ready"? You are 27 years old? Wake up and start your life already. Commit this guy or some other guy and get married already. Tick tock.
And remember this: condoms have a failure rate. The free-sex crowd doesnt mention that, but it's true. Look it up.
http://www.goaskalice.columbia.edu/2219.html
Read it through. Even if you want to pretend that you have (what is defined there) "perfect" condom use, there is still 3 out of 100 women that got pregnant. Something failed. And if thats just pregnancy rates, think about what the disease rates must be.
2006-12-26 11:51:30 · answer #2 · answered by Uncle Remus 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you think that the chemistry is mutual? Are you already kissing and making out? Are you at least at first base with the guy?
Give yourself a few dates with him to get to know him better. You could risk losing him as a friend by jumping his bones too early. And yes he would think you were easy.....but didn't you say it might be worth it?
You are old enough to know what you want. You should go for it!
You are in a rare class of female to have not experienced sex before. You might find out that you waited so long, and held out for the "real" thing.....only to be disappointed.
The clothes don't drift away like in a fairy tale....the heavens don't open and the angels don't come down during sex. It can be goofy, uncomfortable and sloppy.
Choose the right time, moment and person.
Good Luck,
C-F
2006-12-26 11:44:33 · answer #3 · answered by Crispy_Frog 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will probably scare him away by saying things like, "I need your touch" or "All I can think about is sleeping with you." You can simply tell him that you are attracted to him and let everything else take care of itself. If he's really that special, then the best thing that can happen is for the two of you to have a long relationship together. Try to go for that instead of just a one night stand. You might also want to let him know about your virginity before you finally have sex with him. You will be sending a mixed message by coming on so strong and not really knowing how to "finish the deal". Don't worry, most guys will be happy to help teach the finer points of lovemaking! Congratulations on falling in love!
2006-12-26 11:43:09 · answer #4 · answered by unlvrebelyellow 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think ur full of crapola. A virgin at 27 is like a tractor that sat in the woods for 50 years. It's a fixedure. You seem indeed very excited, and that doesn't just spring on a virgin like a sailor on shoreleave. My guess is ur not very adept at sex, you are younger than you claim, the guy is older, and you want to present a purer you to him cause of how he makes you feel now. Which is all cool hun. A 27 yr old virgin does not toss away the work and investment on a whim and for loose moral principals. However a 17 hormonal honeypot trying to forget those two guys in gym class does.
2006-12-26 11:48:02 · answer #5 · answered by NIGHTSHADE 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
you have gone this long saving yourself and you are willing to throw that all away for a moment a pleasure. You will enjoy it more if you continue to wait for a meaningful relationship. Horny is what you are hold on to your ideal relationship but is you must give in most men will not run from the opportunity go out on a date and end the night at his or your place
2006-12-26 11:51:54 · answer #6 · answered by PhillyDude 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are a very special woman to have stayed a virgin this long, GOOD FOR YOU !
I would stay that way until the guy that I'm planning on spending the rest of my life with comes along.
It would be the single most greatest thing you could offer the man you love, TRUST ME !
That's what I done and he just cherished me for that.
That was the most special thing that I could have ever offered the man I love. He will never ever forget that special thing you saved for him. He will Honor you beyond words.
Don't waste that special thing on a man that's here today gone tomorrow. You will never be a virgin again, once its gone its gone for good.
It should be saved for Mr wright, don't waste that special gift on just anyone...PLEASE !
2006-12-26 11:47:45 · answer #7 · answered by Bridget 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Try becoming close friends first. Once you really know each other better, you will feel more comfortable to give it up.
You don't have to fall in love or anything like that, but at least he won't take you easy and the knowledge about him may also help adding spices to your first time "doing it" plus you might end up more than just friends after that.
I wish I had that chance but I didn't at my first time. Good luck.
2006-12-26 11:40:58 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since you have waited this long then you should continue to wait on someone that you are in a committed relationship with. Why rush now?? If there is a possibility of a relationship, then you will have plenty of time to have sex with him, you should get to know him better first. If you do decide to do it be safe.
2006-12-26 11:38:14 · answer #9 · answered by *sexy mocha* 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As you like this guy so there is a natural urge. No problem. Use protection. Try to know whether he is serious about a permanent relationship with you. Best of luck.
2006-12-26 11:50:34 · answer #10 · answered by Pramod 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋