my boyfriend and I have been in a serious relationship for almost two years now, and for some reason he doesn't want me to meet his parents. He says that there isn't anything wrong, and that he wants to make sure that the girl brings to his parents is the "one", it's been two years now, should I try to meet his parents regardless?
2006-12-26 07:02:11 · 12 answers · asked by curley03 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
That's a little long to wait. Has he met your family?
If he doesn't think you are the "one" after 2 years, well, you guys might have a problem. I think you should explore this aspect of his response, rather than just the "meeting the parents" situation. Get specific. Do you love one another? Can he be specific about why you might not be the "one" after 2 years in a serious relationship? Pin him down, you can be supportive and gentle in the way you approach it and not in "attack" mode, but I'd want to know what kind of time frame he's got in mind! Also, are there aspects of the relationship that make him feel you are not "the one?"
2006-12-26 07:06:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He could be just afraid. I know, I hate introducing girls to my parents. Personally I believe, the time to introduce the girl I am dating to my parents is after I proposed to her, (parents don't matter, I am dating the girl not them so what they think of her is irrelevant) but thats me.
First time introduction to parents isn't easy and can be very stressfull, especially if he thinks his parents might embarrass him by what they ask or how they act, or may not approve of you for what ever reason (eventhough he thinks you are great) or maybe he not close his parents. The point is I don't think you she read too much into it. If you love him and trust him and he hasn't done anything to make you doubt your trust in him or your relationship, then just be patient and let him introduce you when he feels he is ready.
Will meeting his parents change your relationship or the way you feel about him?
2006-12-26 07:22:28 · answer #2 · answered by Curious 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you aren't the only girl in his life and he doesn't want to be found out. Sorry to be a pessimist, but sometimes the truth is there and we don't want to know it. Think about it, if he does have another girl that his parents know about it would be kind of bad if they found out about you. Get to the truth of the matter and decide if you want to be kept a secret any longer. I sure wouldn't. I was scared about meeting my now mother n law for the first time, but met her after a couple of months of dating and this was even with the fact that he had been married b4 and I knew she probably wouldn't want him considering it again. We've been married for almost 12 yrs now. Turns out I was the one, but it didn't take him 2 years to introduce me to her. Something definetley is not right. Tell him if he is ashamed of you or them that it should be your or their decesion to decide how you guys feel about each other. Good luck.
2006-12-26 07:42:23 · answer #3 · answered by tc381mc 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
TWO YEARS!?! That's too long. He's either hiding you from his parents or he's hiding his parents from you. Either way, something is not right. I think that part of being "the one" is that his parents like you. I can understand not introducing you to his whole extended family, but you should have met his parents by now. Find an excuse to call his mom and talk to her. If you start chitchatting with his mom, she's going to want to meet you.
2006-12-26 07:13:31 · answer #4 · answered by ☆skyblue 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't try to meet his parents; he wouldn't be able to trust you anymore. Is it possible that he's ashamed of his parents? If not he doesn't think that you're the "one" at least not yet. But after 2 yrs he shld know so I guess you have to decide if you want to stay with him or move on. I would stop seeing him (no contacting him); maybe after thinking about it for a few mos he'll know whether or not you're the "one." Whatever you decide to do I wish you good luck.
2006-12-26 07:28:18 · answer #5 · answered by Judith 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you particularly need to ask him approximately this. you is basically no longer happy till you get a straighforward answer from him. If the holiday is already going on precise now, then you certainly will basically ought to attend till he gets decrease back. tell him you like him, and you theory the two certainly one of you have been in an rather good, extreme courting. Ask him why he did no longer ask you to fulfill his mom and dad, clarify that it harm your thoughts, and tell him which you certainly had to fulfill them. If he's no longer letting you meet his mom and dad, it ought to propose that he's hiding something (like that his mom and dad does no longer approve, perhaps because of the fact of your race or something). you're able to desire to be beforehand with one yet another. secrets and strategies at the instant are not ok.
2016-11-23 18:09:59 · answer #6 · answered by cantabrana 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i'm a girl but i actually understand him. i dont want my parents to get involved in my relationships so the one i'll bring home must be THE one. Just give it time, he already told you he needs to make sure and sometimes it takes people years to make sure. Be patient. Remember in sex and the city, how many years did it take big to say carrie is the one?
2006-12-26 07:11:08 · answer #7 · answered by little asian gal in cresent city 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you should NOT take it upon yourself to go and meet them
Something is NOT right with this picture...sounds to me like he may be hiding something from you, them or both. You two need to have a serious talk. Do you want to spend more time and emotions on someone who is obvisously not looking at this relationship like you are?? It might be time to move on.
2006-12-26 07:08:29 · answer #8 · answered by Edisto 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think this is a bit weird. He may be afraid of his parent's feelings about him being in a "serious" relationship, or he may be embarrased about something regarding his parents and are afraid you will not approve of them, or they may not approve of you. I would sit him down and calmly ask him why he isn't allowing you to meet them. Good luck.
2006-12-26 07:05:52 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
yes, you should try to meet his parents. Tell him you want to meet them. If he won't let you meet his parents, just ask why? there might be a reason that he doesn't want you to meet them.
2006-12-26 07:07:20 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋