If you were pretty sure that your partner were in the relationship just to bide time and/or had no intentions of settling down and you wanted to. What would you do? If the relationship were good, with the rough spots that most all relationships had, would you stay invovlved and work through the rough spots even if you knew that their were no promise for the future?
2006-12-26 04:27:54 · 9 answers · asked by tana 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Girl, I feel ya on this one... Im in the same situation that you are in... Are you sure we are not dating the same GUY!!! Its hard to say because I am still with my guy and he is truly wonderful, but I am so sick and tired of him dragging his feet... I can't picture myself being with anyone other than himself, I mean we do have reason why we are taking it slow.... but I am at the age where I want to be married or least engaged... Im all for a long engagment it would atleast show a sign that he is getting closer to that big leap... I can only say stick it out... but if you feel in your heart that there is no chance at reaching the ultimate prize then I say leave him... dont use him as a crutch... Its a scary thought when it comes to playing the dating game!!
2006-12-26 04:34:43 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are some things you can work around -- as you say, all relationships have rough spots now and then.
And there are some things that just point out too great a conflict in you and your partners' life goals.
The question here is: do you think this person isn't ready to settle down NOW but might be in six months, or do you think this person will NEVER be ready to settle down?
If your vision for your own future includes a committed partner for life, to start building a shared future and a family, then this is an important question to resolve. If the relationship is good, you really love your partner and can wait a few months, then it might be worth working through the rough spots to stay with this partner.
On the other hand, if you know that your partner's vision for the future isn't compatible with yours in some fundamental way that doesn't allow for compromise, then it's time to move on.
But on re-reading your question more than once... it sounds as though you're pretty sure that settling down isn't something this partner wants out of life. In which case the question becomes, is being with this person rewarding enough to give up on your own hopes and dreams for your future in exchange for "biding time" with this one? And again... on re-reading your question, it's clear you know the answer in your own heart, so I'll speak it:
It's not worth staying in a relationship that had no promise for the future. For a while, yes, but eventually you need to get on with your life -- and, it would appear, not with this partner.
2006-12-26 05:01:58 · answer #2 · answered by Scott F 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the partner is biding time, no intentions of settling down...then the relationship is NOT good, and those aren't rough spots, its just a bad waste of time for you both.
I know its hard, but get a little self esteem and move on. Don't waste another day on this and definitely don't bring it in the new year.
2007 is your year to meet a partner that is as in love with you as you are with them! But you have to be available to receive...
Luck!
2006-12-26 04:35:48 · answer #3 · answered by I Think 4 Me 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i'm female, yet i will talk for my husband. His intentions were to marry sometime in late 20s or early 30s. in my opinion, my intentions were similar. yet we knew that we were the right human beings for an additional and both were given to the point the position it did not make experience to anticipate marriage anymore. So we were given married at the same time as he replaced into 25 and that i replaced into 22. adult males and women human beings can both have diverse "plans" on at the same time as they favor to "calm down," yet for all of us, it extremely basically occurs once you locate the right man or woman. this would take position beforehand or later than you intend.
2016-12-01 04:42:31 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to the person and let them know exactly how you are feeling. For your own sake if you both are not on the same path then start to distance yourself from the situation. It will get harder for you as time passes by. Good luck.
2006-12-26 04:31:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I felt the same a year ago and I stuck with him.Rather be with someone I enjoy being with and I'm now married for 5 months...
This is your choice,you can still secure your future in other forms...
Goodluck...
2006-12-26 04:56:01 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
all things take time..but if he was not willing or have no intentions on settleing down with you..then its never gonna change..or it might..only time will tell..but you will be angry with yourself if you invested sooo much time and then to be let down..so it s up to you really if you want to stay or leave
2006-12-26 04:32:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope, I'd leave the relationship.
2006-12-26 04:40:31 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
nope
2006-12-26 04:30:54 · answer #9 · answered by Mean Carleen 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋