first time parents?

Question

Just out of curiosity i wanted to know how many first ime parents there are out there. Im a mother of 4 boys ages 8,6,6,4 and baby number 5 on the way. It blows my mind how "perfect" some of these first time parents try to be!!! is it just me, this will NOT always be perfect and you live and learn and grow from that and learn to let loose alot. Someone freaking out about there 2 1/2 year old drinking some soda, HA if that was the least of your problems you have it made. WAIT until they get to be 6 and 8 lol then you will know what i mean. Its funny. They worry about not spending enough, doing every thing just right, all the disipline has to be done a certain way. Its like a fairy tale parenting story. I make mistakes, but i learn from them. I sure dont handle my kids with white gloves or they would be running all over me.....Any thing to add to this?

Answer 1

i agree, thee is no perfect parent, we just do what we know best and try not to raise criminals

Answer 2

Goodness, Lewis has some insecurities about himself that he's projecting it would seem. Personally I'm a first-time parent...and I know I'm a freak about "the right way" a lot of the time. Our family's new mantra is "It's the big things that matter". I no longer freak that Daddy can't pick out a cute outfit to save his soul...or that he annoys the daycare people by announcing DaddyDaughter days when he was supposed to take her in that morning. And he no longer worries about me bringing our daughter into our bed every time she gets upset for more then 5 min in the night and the fact that I try to plan every single detail of her activities. We're trying our best to mellow and just let our daughter be a kid while she can. It's like when your child falls down for the first time ever you have a heart attack but after the 70th time you realize if it didn't stop them from playing then it couldn't have bothered them that much. We've gotten to that point with parenting I think. The first time our daughter got sent to daycare in mismatched clothes bothered me but she doesn't seem to care as long as she's warm (which she always is) so I try not to obsess about it. The other thing I've learned is the things I thought were crucial (as told to me by the latest books on parenting) my mother, in laws, and grandparents think are absolute bunk. We still try to stick to the guidelines but we don't panic when we stray. Kids aren't supposed to have peanuts before 3...and apparently I would have starved to death if that had been a rule when I was a kid. No sleeping on tummies....we did as kids. Attachment parenting....we were "ferberized". There's no right way to parent just the best you can do...it's been a hard lesson to learn but I hope I always remember it.

Answer 3

Wife and I have 2, 17 and 20. But house is filled at all hours with other kids (friends of our kids). Have 3 other kids who call my wife and I, mom and dad, they spend almost as much time in our house as they do their own. Their parents are glad my wife and I have let them stay there as much as we do, the parents know their kids are safe there and not out getting into trouble. I feel if I can have a posative influence with them it will be for the best. Couple of the kids are from single parent homes. Is our home perfect... nope.. it's more like organized chaos.

Answer 4

Kudos to you! My husband and I don't have kids yet, but know that common sense will have to take a front seat to kids these days. And it's really "kids" these days that are bad. It's when the parents try to start discipline at the wrong age.

I won't be a hard a*s, but I won't let them run all over me. Pick your battles: let them have soda every now and then, or have them disrespect me.

Answer 5

maybe if you didn't have more kids than you could handle, you would beable to worry about such idiotic things as how to raise a polite, moral child..... your right though, just keep spitting them out and do just enough to keep them alive. Each one of your kids should be arrested before they grow up and steal my wallet! Who do you think you are, what gives you the right to bash on new parents for wanting to do a great job of parenting. Just because you have 5 kids, doesn't make you a grood parent, it means you can still concieve. Get off your high horse and cut them a break.

Answer 6

I agree with you. My wife was (and in some respects, still is) very much a perfectionist and trying to make everything "just so" with kids is impossible. I think she has learned the hard way. The most important thing is to show them you love them despite their flaws. Perhaps in return, they will love you despite yours.

Answer 7

I HAVE 3 KIDS 12,6,AND 7 1/2 MONTHS I GOT MY TUBES TIED AND HAD MY HUSBAND GET FIXED AS WELL EACH KID IS THERE ON PERSON SO YOU RAISE EACH ONE DIFFERENTLY. PARENTS WHO ARE FIRST TIMERS DO TREAT THERE KIDS DIFFERENTLY BECAUSE THEY ARE UNSURE OF ALOT OF THINGS WHERE THE PARENTS OF MORE THEN ONE KNOW DIFFERENT...CONGRATS TO ANYONE WHO BECOMES A PARENT!!!!!