My boyfriend and I have been together nearly 3 years and we just got engaged! The thing is, my sister can't stand him & keeps telling everyone how I can do better & that me & him aren't meant for each other. He's a good guy & treats me well and is always polite to my sister. How do I get her to quit badmouthing him??
2006-12-25 22:26:54 · 31 answers · asked by Happy go Lucky 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I have talked to her about it & she says the reason she doesn't like him is that she doesn't think he's smart enough or have enough money (he's in college).
2006-12-25 22:38:40 · update #1
Ask her to be your main bridesmaid The past is past try to forgive and forget your marriage is a whole new ballgame.
2006-12-25 22:39:33 · answer #1 · answered by burning brightly 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i dont think you will like my answer but ill say it any ways. first off your boyfreind has changed since he has been with you the reason i know this is that no matter how much we say we will never change for any one else we do it every time that we get into a new relationship. the reason neither of you have noticed it is because love is blind you wont see it until you get married and settle down for a while and then you will both start to see how much difrent your lives are. you will notice the little things that you changed about yourself to make him more happy and he will do the same. some times this will cause issues in a mariage (i know it did in mine) but thats apart of the whole deal you work throught it. thats why people say that the first few years are so hard. so from the outside looking in its easier to see these changes espacialy if they dont see each other on a regular basis. now to answer the other part of the question is very dificult because if they are close wichi will assume they are if she is being this judgementle of you then it could be that she is just jealose of you.what i mean is she has a picture in her head that she has more than likely had for a long time of the woman she exspects her brother to be with its similare to a little girl with a prince charming fantise and she is going to judge you subcontiously against those standerds she has already had set for him. ofcoures you wont meet those standards no woman ever will in her eyes. what i would recomend is that you talk to you boyfreind and tell him how you feel about what she said about you. then i would have him talk to her and let him try to smooth things over before the holidays. after that when you see her at your family gathering you should appologize for how she felt. let her know that you didnt mean to seem to good for her hospitality and let her know that you are not trying to hurt her relationship with her brother. reassure her of the fact that you are in love with her brother and not just along for the ride. and if that dont work then atleast you know you did all you could and you still have your integrity sorry for the spelling
2016-05-23 07:28:54 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetheart be careful, Your sister wants your man. Look your man is young and he is in college. And after college he stands to make a lot of money, And your sister wants you out of the picture, So she can live the life she has so long for. If you really love this guy then you don't need your sister blessing. Just get him as far a away from her as you can. Or you won't have a man or a husband to be.
2006-12-25 23:20:26 · answer #3 · answered by omegarussell42 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you asked your sister why she does not like your Fiance? If she has a valid reason, maybe you should take that into consideration. However, if she is unable to back up her "opinion" of him, then she should keep her mouth shut.
I do understand your predicament because my husbands mother and two sisters can not stand me and I really do not know why; they have never confronted me or my husband to explain why they feel this way.
Let's put it this way... I had one awkward Christmas being over there for the little amount of time we were there for.
I wouldn't want to wish my situation on anyone, therefore I would try to resolve this thing with your sister as quickly as possible.
2006-12-25 22:36:25 · answer #4 · answered by Mac 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her straight out that you don't appreciate this sort of behaviour. Tell her how potentially damaging it can be for your future relationship with him (you may unwillingly start to take on her views about him).
I'm sure you've never badmouthed her previous boyfriends (if you have, this may make having this conversation with her quite difficult) and there's no justification for her words.
Sounds like you need to talk through the situation very seriously with her. If you're willing to spend the rest of your life with him, and if she loves you, she has to accept him, whether she likes him or not.
2006-12-25 22:39:27 · answer #5 · answered by jojo000078 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, try to think if your sister has a point. After all, she IS your sister. She might just be looking out for you and know something you don't.
However, if you talk to her and still don't see what the problem is with your fiance... after all, you DO love him, you have to tell your sister, "I'm happy and as my sister, I'd expect you to be happy for me too." If she still badmouths him after that, you have to force yourself to stop caring about her opinion.
2006-12-25 22:31:10 · answer #6 · answered by Rachel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask for honesty from her as to the why. She may know more than you think and just not telling you to save your feelings because your her sister and she loves you. Maybe she has seem him doing something he should not have or perhaps he has hit on or flirted with her and she hates him for it just go out to lunch with her and tell her that you love her and value her opinion but if she can't tell you in no uncertain terms why not him that you want her to accept your choice as it is your life but try to get her to give that honest answer first gl
2006-12-25 22:34:20 · answer #7 · answered by johndoe915 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is your sister jelouse you have found a man who finds you worthy to be his wife? Or Does she know something you don't know? I would sit down with your sister and calmly ask her what is on her mnind and why she feels that your fiancee is not worthy of you. let her speak without interupting and ask her to do the same when you let her know about how much her remarks are hurting you. Your sister should be happy that you have founbd a good man. Congratulations on becoming a future bride. Best of luck.
2006-12-25 22:33:08 · answer #8 · answered by ANASTASIA_NIKOLAIEVNA_ROMANOVA 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should have a serious talk with her and let her know that her behaviour towards your fiance is just not acceptable. You should make it clear that its your life and your decision so she better not interfere in this.You could also take help of your family members or somebody who's close to your sister to sort this issue.
2006-12-25 23:26:16 · answer #9 · answered by Leogirl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you love you sis a lot and so this is the reason it is bothering you, why dont you ask your sis d reason of her dislike, and than try to solve it, even though if she is the same, than leave it oneday she will know her mistake and everythng will be ok... May be your sis loves you alot and she feels you are much more better than you finance and you can have a better life with someone else... dont worry, it happens
2006-12-25 22:34:32 · answer #10 · answered by Richa 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds fishy, he's a good guy, but she hates him...she's either really jealous, or something else is going on. You may want to get to the bottom of this before you get married. Get them together, and try to figure out what is going on.
2006-12-25 22:32:05 · answer #11 · answered by Kerry 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋