ok . my family sucks! i found out my dads a drunk and my mom yells out of stress. try as i might i give her stress when i even double check to wht im doing wrong. my dad makes me just break down all the time. he goes to AA meetings but how can i know its working. i mena i just found out and hes been drinking all my life. he started drinking becaz my mom got cancer while being pregnit without her nowing about the cancer. the baby was 4 months premature and sadly died. since the my dad has been drinking. i always feel like im never good enough! i try everything tht my school offers to make him proud but i feel like i cant becaz hes either working or sleeping and is never there 4 my games, plays , or anything!! he makes my mom cry so bad ! me 2 ! how can i call him dad??? he is nothing to me now? how can i 4give ? i mean i want to forgive but its hard ? what can i do to make him love me , be there for me, be .....a dad.
i hope i make since so i guess tht this is a cry 4 help..
2006-12-25 14:38:45 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
i cant find an Al-Anon and im to great with sharing things like this to pple i know....thanks keep giving the words
2006-12-25 14:56:31 · update #1
not to great is wht i ment.
2006-12-25 14:58:35 · update #2
um i dont want to talk to my dad. he wont listen ! ive tried ! y now ? and my mom is going stuff to help her
2006-12-25 17:49:11 · update #3
Sweetheart find your nearest Al-Anon in the phonebook. Tell them what's going on and they will direct you to a support group of kids just like you. The anger you are feeling (justifiable though it is) will backlash on you. Try to get your Mom to go to meetings after you get yourself established in one. You sadly can't make your Dad be a Dad. The alcohol has too big a hold on him. If he is going to AA and following the program this should turn around for you. I was the child of an alcoholic and I know your pain. Please for your own sake get the support you need. I will be thinking of you. Good luck.
2006-12-25 14:50:08 · answer #1 · answered by mjm52 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie, this is a place to start, but just reading some text isn't going to do much. You need to talk to someone in person that can help you. Here are some phone numbers you might want to try. They're toll free, so you can call them from anywhere. Good Luck Hun...
Al-Anon/Alteen: 800-356-9996
Al-Anon Family Groups, Inc.: 800-344-2666
Youth America Hotline: 1-877-968-8454
2006-12-25 15:01:36 · answer #2 · answered by Silverwolf 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with the first two answers, but also, start thinking about yourself more. i learned from experience that you can almost never count on your parents for anything. my parents didn't even go to my elementary school graduation, and i had to beg both of them to go to my middle school graduation, from which i did with honors. They've never come to any school performance in my life. So, dont count on them for anything. Ignore it all, which is what i do, and focus on how fabulous your life is going to be when you leave that home and are enjoying your own life. Get an education, go to college, and then leave. Go far away. Those are kind of what my plans are.
2006-12-25 14:58:12 · answer #3 · answered by Laura 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Talk to a doctor. A school teacher, a nurse. Child help line. The problem is not YOU. Writing for help sounds like you are mature and want to solve this b.s. Try and stay out of their way til you find an adult to talk this out with. You need to.
2006-12-25 14:45:01 · answer #4 · answered by cripesokay2 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when people are alcoholics, they want to do things, but they can't because they are always drunk, or thinking about drinking, and they can't think of anything else. Not to mention, he can't drive around to your games when he's drunk because of a risk of DUI.
It sounds like he's trying to quit and it might take a year or two.
Once he quits, his head will be a lot clearer, and he'll be a different person. Until then, he's a prisoner of his bottle.
2006-12-25 14:46:32 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
TRUST ME...I've been in harder situations then you are now at only being 13.I want you to think and pause for a moment,probably you've already done this...but talk to him and tell him how you feel.Tell him to be strong and forget the pass.Also,you need to be strong and help your mom be strong too.PROBABLY,you didn't got what I just said but if you think about it VERY HARD...this WILL HELP ;)
2006-12-25 14:46:35 · answer #6 · answered by Curiousity 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First off check into counseling. Second dont let your parents actions in their own lives make you feel like you did something wrong. You dont give him the alcohol and her the inability to control her anger those are their issues sounds to me like they need counseling too
good luck
2006-12-25 14:44:22 · answer #7 · answered by Catie 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you should call the #s that Silverwolf gave to you. don't give up on you father. remember that alcoholism is a disease, it's a family disease. you need to concentrate on yourself and get yourself well.
once i realized that alcoholism is a disease it made me see my father and brother in a whole new way and through al-anon i got the tools i needed to change my own attitude. the changes in my life in just over a year has not only given me back my serenity and happiness it has given me back my brother and father
2006-12-26 18:03:33 · answer #8 · answered by hairpoor 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have your dad read this and then discuss it with him. You might be surprised at the results.
2006-12-25 14:48:06 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
check into counceling ...
2006-12-25 15:16:18 · answer #10 · answered by Promise 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋