I've always been attracted to older men ever since I was a child. When I was a teenager my friends would be checking out guys our age while I'd be checking out men that are old enough to be my grandpa. My family knows that I only like very very old men and they think that there's something wrong with me. I'm in my early 20's now and I'm dating a man that's 75 years old. He's not rich at all but it was his personality and looks that made him so beautiful to me. My family really doesn't approve of our relationship especially since I'm pregnant with his child. Am I really sick in the head as people say???
2006-12-25 12:09:25 · 16 answers · asked by Britney S 2 in Health ➔ Mental Health
You're over 18, nothing wrong with it. Be attracted to whatever you want to be attracted to.
2006-12-25 12:11:43 · answer #1 · answered by ☆Tąrą☆ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"They" say that young girls appear to be attractive to older men as a way of replacing the image of the father figure they might have missed in their lives. I don't know that this is your case, but I believe that the heart really does not have a picture in mind of the age of a person. The heart does not 'see' what the mind and eyes see. In your heart, you have already afixed, for whatever reason, your desire for a relationship that is pleasing to you in older gentlemen. Since you are of age, hopefully you are responsible enough to handle this situation. It would be the same or worse, if you were 75 and he was 20's. Believe me, I've been there on the opposite side and it's not any prettier. There are always going to be some areas that you will differ, just because of the timeline involved. What I am most concerned about is 1) how healthy is he - having a child with him might mean he may not be around to experience the child's growing years - and then we don't know that either, but the odds are there. It's something you have to face. 2) You don't mention marriage - 3) Were you trying to get pregnant? That's probably something I would have thought twice about. If you and your friend have a strong relationship, you communicate on every level about everything, both of you are positive, healthy and are caring for each other - your friends and family will just have to get over it - that is - if they want to be a part of your baby's life. You don't need extra added stress - but I would make sure that you are covered (insurance, health, welfare of your child) just as any other man would have to be responsible and step up to the plate with child support. You have to think about your child. Good luck to you and your new family.
2006-12-25 12:19:42 · answer #2 · answered by THE SINGER 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I was attracted to older men also in my early 20's. It was because they were on my level as far as intelligence and knowledge...conversational skill is a must and plus for women.
They were also more respectful, understanding and patient overall. Perhaps having learned something from their first mistakes? I didn't have to worry about pawing, etc. Men my age were irresponsible and immature. One man was the owner of the Boston Playboy Club so am aging myself.
But, bottom line, girls/women are generally more mature than their opposites of the same age. My daughter, at 18-20 dated men in their 30's & 40's for the same reason. I am happy she married on 9-22-06 with a man aged 25, she is 21.
I agree with others that a man of older age leads to problems in the long run. If your love is real, you won't mind taking care of him in sickness which will be a reality before you know it, as well as the fact he will not be able to keep up with new learnings and conversations with you. Being young, these factors would probably never enter into your mind. Think very hard now for the future of your child as well as yourself. I wish you all the best.
2006-12-25 12:37:51 · answer #3 · answered by S E 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Was your Father in your live as you were a child? This could be linked to the attraction to older men.
I would say yes there is something wrong with it. He has 50 plus more years of life experience than you.
2006-12-25 12:15:45 · answer #4 · answered by Eye Candy 3 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Hmm.... not for me to make judgements about you, but I would wonder how long this has been going on? If you have been sexually attracted to men who are your grandfather's age since you were just a little girl I would hunch that you have probably had some experience with sexualization by a man your grandfather's age... perhaps you don't recall this... and that is a common denominator among young women who are drawn to older men. A friend of mine tells me that in her (third world) country-of-origin it is pretty common for young women to marry older men for econcomic survival, but euphemistically the men are referred to as D.O.M (Dirty Old Man/Men). In our North American Society we sometimes refer to them as pedophiles. Read the book "Lolita" if you would like a look at the psychological outlook of one man who lusted after a much younger female. I would feel quite concerned if my father (late 70s) was attracted-- and acted on that attraction-- with a young woman young enough to be my daughter. I would see him as being irresponsible, or at least severely arrested in his development (which he is not). But now I'm making judgements. Sorry....
In my former life, before I retired, I worked with pregnant teens and found that many of the older men that had assaulted them sexually (and that was the case numerous times), the young women were ''unprotected" young females, largely... quite often victims of rape or incest... and these older fellas often moved in on them like moths to a flame. Some were the putative fathers, some were just there to play hero and have themselves a submissive, young wife to meet their needs.
Hope I didn't offend you... just my experiences and ideas.
Merry Christmas!
HealthiaCynthia
Certified Comprehensive Coach
Moderator of My Monday Miracles
http://ca.groups.yahoo.com/group/My_Monday_Miracles/
2006-12-25 12:30:14 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
The problem is finding a young MAN to date.
Most guys today are BOYS in men's bodies.
So you had to look for someone really old to find the maturity you were looking for.
Good luck with your relationship.
2006-12-25 12:16:46 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
hi Jenna, Why no longer ask him what he reveals attractive in a woman? in case you're at it, why no longer ask him what he's calling for in his next relationship and take it from there? From my reports, (i'm 40 8), relationship young women people that are alluring and drawn to older adult adult males, the two could have subject-loose backgrounds and destiny plans, in the experience that your pastime is for a relationship (previous 2hrs. or 2mths). if so, then you certainly the two one in each of you may communicate, you may gown to electrify wisely, freshen up your language, if choose for be? (he has teenagers). that's, in case you go with for something greater? self belief and adulthood in no way hurts! good luck!
2016-10-18 23:46:57 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no not at all maybe it is that you know that older men have more respect for woman than people our age. if you are happy than that is all that matters and congrats with the new baby
2006-12-25 12:16:39 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
gross, i bet his boobs are saggier than yours! One day when you get to old and can't have a young hot guy you are going to regret this!!! when you said older men, i was thinking 40ish, not 75, please go for someone who was at least born when television was around.
2006-12-25 12:16:04 · answer #9 · answered by Caterina C 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
well.
i don't what say,..other than the old men like it!
no,you are not very sick.
2006-12-25 12:14:59 · answer #10 · answered by iroc 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋