I have been the nice guy all my life and all it has gotten me is an empty bed and heartbreak. Now that I'm in my mid thirties and with no experience (dating or sex) I feel somewhat ashamed and have no idea how to go about things. The idea of dating a woman who is experienced scares me a bit and I also feel like I missed out on a lot of fun because I was taught to do something that really wasn't right anyway (at least by todays standards) and it's just bugging me. God! Did I screw up? Since I am a guy was it just expected of me to just 'screw around'? Is it to late? Will women accept me as I am? Or am I going to have to find someone exceptional to put up with me? Can I make it in a world of almost professional sex practitioners in this dating scene?
2006-12-25 11:36:54 · 9 answers · asked by InvicibleStar 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I envy you !
I was a complete jerk throughout my life-slept around and went thru two turbulent marriages. Now I am madly in love with a girl who I feel that I am not good enough for because of my past. Guilt is obviously an issue for me but I had some serious regrets about my past.
You will find the right person if you look in the right place! Do volunteer work,find a church, find a worthy cause and you will find a worthy woman. Good Luck!
2006-12-25 11:43:23 · answer #1 · answered by boobird 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you shouldn't. And you shouldn't be ashamed either. Personally, if I found someone who was in your position, I'd not only feel flattered, but I'd feel honored as well. Just because something is "the norm" doesn't mean we should do it. I mean, I don't think, just because you're a guy, that you're expected to 'screw around' and for several reasons. For one thing, you can catch a whole slew of sexual diseases! Two, if I know someone's sleeping around and I'm trying to find someone to settle down with, I'd much rather pick someone like you than someone who's playing the field! (I'd think, if they're playing this long, they may not want to settle down and skip them altogether.)
If it makes you feel better, I'm suddenly single after almost 17 yrs of marriage and my ex is the ONLY person I've been with. The prospect of being with someone who's experience, like you, can be daunting. (And intimidating as all get out!) Plus, like you said, the shoe's on the other foot, per sey. Just because I'm experienced with my ex, do people think I can do all sorts of 'tricks' (for lack of a better word) and stuff and will just do anything? (Which, the answer is "Heck no!") So I can feel for your situation. And for the part about "I feel like I missed out on a lot of fun because I was taught to do something that really wasn't right anyway (at least by today's standards)" you have to ask yourself how important IS doing things by 'today's standards'? <--personally, I couldn't give a fruit loop about it (and will say so!). I mean,if they were all jumping off of Trump Tower, would you do it? I certainly wouldn't! lol Just things to think on. (my 2 1/2 cents lol)
2006-12-25 19:57:14 · answer #2 · answered by Qmd86 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
no you should not have. do not be intimidated by experienced women. Some of them have too much. There are still some left out there that don't have any or much. You didn't miss out on a bunch of fun, unless you call STDs fun. No you were not expected to "screw around", yes, a woman will accept you as you are. Yes you can make it in this world. believe it or not not all guys are players and women don't look for players to be good husbands and fathers. They look / want a guy like you.
2006-12-25 19:44:13 · answer #3 · answered by Pandora 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't judge your decisions based on stupid one's in the world today. That's what gets most of the world in the position they're in. The right woman will accept you for who you are. The right woman, experienced or not, isn't going to care about your 'lack of history'. Every woman has a different special thang anyway. Don't shy away from one's with experience either. They may be the fast track to a good lesson in sexual education.
2006-12-25 19:41:11 · answer #4 · answered by Joan McBitch 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dude just get out there. It doesn't matter if the first few women you have sex with doesn't go well just use them for practice until you get your groove then you'll be okay. Mentally just know that they aren't keepers just practice women.
2006-12-25 19:43:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
well....u can start by having sex. em... just get a girl that u r comfortable with...and u have been missing out.. but its not too late to correct yourself!! just go out there, and pick up a girl. that doesn't mean be an ******, be yourself, but a little more aggressive. women like that
2006-12-25 19:40:30 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
yeah, chill, dude just jump in the water and find out if its hot later.
2006-12-25 19:46:59 · answer #7 · answered by sufferingnomad 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
man just chill.. u sound like a woman! everything should just come naturally
2006-12-25 19:39:25 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
no
2006-12-25 19:37:48 · answer #9 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋