What should i do?

Question

Me and my boyfriend recently broke up and i really miss him badly. We were perfect together all along. We've been together for almost two years now and we broke up because we thought that we should give ourselves different opportunities to see the world. We are 19. We are still able to maintain a really good friendship together, still talk normally, play normally. Like best friends. But i really feel upset when i know i cannot have him as a lover anymore. And i can't help myself from holding his arm, hands, as usual. And hedoesn't mind. Although he will emphasize to me that i shouldn't do that anymore. He is also there to help me with this breakup, he consoles me and also tells me to focus on other aspects of my life. He is a really nice person, and my friends tells me that he misses me too. All along, i thought we were perfect for each other and i'm just not willing to let him go. But i've already tried a last attempt to sort things out with him already but it didnt work out. I know

i know that i shouldn't wait for him, but i really really want him back. I dont mind have no status but just be with him. I really dont mind alot of things. I know we will definately be able to remain as really good friends but sometimes i would want more than that. And i will feel defeated if he were to find another girl. I don't know what i should ask for but i would really like to hear comments from you people out there. Ps, i really like him alot alot and i wish we could be together till we grow old and die.

I also want to know if u guys think that we will have any future together? Maybe 2-3 years later? When we get older. What are the chances?

Answer 1

Hmm.....you know it's only gonna be harder if you stay friends with him since you'll be constantly reminded of what you two shared. My advice for you is to move on but I know it's easier said than done and I know your heart doesn't want to let go. However, if the feelings are not mutual then you really don't have any choice but to move on. Have you tried telling him exactly how you feel? Tell him how you miss him and how you're willing to compromise. If he still resists then you have to move on because if you don't then only YOU will continue hurting yourself. I know it's tough and you probably hate the words "move on" but think how this will effect you in the long run. Better now than later. Ask him one more time and see how he reacts. Don't force him, simply tell him that you're ready to move on if his feelings aren't mutual. Hope everything works out for ya.....Good luck and best wishes..

Answer 2

You know... guys get as confused about relationships as girls do. When it comes to matters of the heart, wisdom usually suffers. You say you were perfect for each other, if that was so, why did you REALLY break up. To experience the world? Or to try new lovers? That's what you have to address with him, the REAL desire for the split.

If it IS an honest to goodness break-up, remember...letting go is always, always hard, but that is EXACTLY what you have to do...let go.

It sounds like he is no longer interested in a romantic relationship with you. A friendship, maybe, but not a romantic relationship. If that is the case, then you have to move on. It sucks, yeah, and it will hurt for a long time, but you have to let go.

It would be best if you didn't spend time with him on a "just friends" basis either. It will be YOU who is misleading YOU. YOU will be making things difficult on yourself by continuing to maintain the illusion that there is still a chance. And there is the chance that you two will have a night of re-visiting your passion only to find out that he has been "experiencing the world" in some other girls beds. In that case you will feel humiliated.

I know your heart is broken. Cry... talk to a friend...write down your thoughts... but you should stay away from him for a very long, long time.

Answer 3

you know i have had the same experience...its hard i know i had my ex boy calling me up late at night wanting to talk about his father or personal probs...when i went over to visit we shared the same bed...it was so hard cos at the end of the day they are the ones breaking up with you. I think this, they love you but at the moment they need to do things, achieve things while they are still young and able to and they hope at the end of the day if they maintain good friendship that you will be there at the end...I would say dont push it because by nature if you push onto a guy he will move away, so take it as friendship and slowly try to heal yourself it takes long and you will always have a tiny part of your heart with him but it just takes time. For me it has been almost a year and a half ago but a tiny part of me pines for him..i just know only time will heal...

Answer 4

Ever heard that song "Love hurts"....sorry, hon. but it does. It's painful letting go of someone that you love especially first loves. But, I can tell you people get over people everyday. You two sound wise to realize that there is a vast world out there and to try to take advantage of it. He's still being nice to you b/c he cares, but if your holding on to the hope of getting back together he should stop being there for you. It just makes it harder to let go. I know it hurts. I ended a 5 year relationship long ago. It hurt like hell. I truly wasn't over him for a couple of years but the pain does get better. Just remember you are doing this "separation" for each other and if he no longer wants it to be on g/f level you should back off , youll just end up starting to think badly of him.

Answer 5

Fallow your heart, but don't let this become a abusive relationship. Be true to yourself and keep your needs in focus. Don't lose who you are and should be. If this guy wants a break, than you need to let go, don't try to hold on to him. Maybe he needs to miss you a little, and if he comes back to you than you will know he cares.

Answer 6

its over
move on