My stepsons are 17 and 19 - and think the world owes them something. My wife is great but these kids do not say thank you, or make an effort to be friendly - nor does she make them. They ignore me and spend hours ((full wasted days) in front of the TV or computer while any extra help around the house is not given. Just venting but what do you think? Should I rock the boat and give them cr@p or lay low?
2006-12-24 19:55:27 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Well first let me say been there and the best thing you can do is to just play host to them, there not your kids, and mom is the one to do discipline, if she doesn't do it, then let it go. some times could get worse if you start complaining to her about it, if you need help with yard work maybe ask her to do some and see how she reacts. Maybe there not used to saying thank you, give them a good role model and teach them that if your nice you will receive kindness back.
2006-12-24 20:05:05 · answer #1 · answered by Lara <:(((>< 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree with many of the responses already - take charge -
I'm in the same boat but reversed -
Actually these young lazy, disrespectful, non-appreciative young lads need discipline, chores, expectations and goals in life. Sounds like mommy doesn't have the control that she thinks she has - except for custody rights.
You have to decide if you want to "rock the boat" - I did and now I'm looking for a new place to live. But I can't live this way any longer so even through it hurts like hell... I'm done - cause I can't stand the laziness, disrespect and non contributions this 22 year old daughter (yes I said 22 year old) puts out.
2006-12-25 06:20:08 · answer #2 · answered by Geanna 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
They should have jobs if they have that much time to waste. I would give them chores and tell them this is your house and they would respect my wishes. If they don't do their chores unplug the internet, have it cut off. Put the computer in your room lock the doors. Show them you mean business and to say "thank you". Tell your wife you need her help that she not do everything for them. They know better they are seeing how far they can push. You will soon get tired of it!! Moms tend to let things slide but this is how they have always treated her and it is hard to change old habits. She needs to listen to your concerns. Tell her you are concerned because the boys don't respect her. Tell her you love her and it hurts you to see them treat her that way. I guarantee she feels frustrated with it and she may open up to suggestions. Good Luck!
2006-12-25 04:15:19 · answer #3 · answered by holliemay 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
GIVE THEM CR@P. It is your house and your new wife and you lay down the law as to how things are going to be and how she is going to be treated.
Let them know that you WILL NOT have them treating her badly.
The first thing you need to do is GET RID of the Internet and take charge of the TV.
Let them know that both are a privilege and will be given back when they act the way they are suppose to.
2006-12-25 04:39:56 · answer #4 · answered by LadyCatherine 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should rock the boat, but rock mom's boat, not the boys. Teenagers will take the easy way out if they have the option, and seems like mom has let them do just that. The situation should have been addressed before marriage, but since it wasn't, you have talk to your wife,let her know how you feel,and go from there.
2006-12-25 06:37:38 · answer #5 · answered by ball_courtney 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, people who marry someone with kids, need to lay down ground rules and expectations before the marriage.
It is too late for that. Your wife is actually the boss of them, But you are her husband and she needs to respect your needs too.
Those boys could break up your marriage if you and the wife arn't on the same page. Get some counseling if you can.;
2006-12-25 04:01:26 · answer #6 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They are in teens , what do you expect ? Cut the cable throw the TV out. If they complain tell em to get a job. your wife needs to put some discipline into them. Talk to her, she needs to tell them to respect you.
If she is the sole earning person then you cant do this stuff, get used to it.
2006-12-25 04:29:31 · answer #7 · answered by funnysam2006 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell the 19 year old to get out of the house, he can get his own computer and TV. the 17 year old needs to get out and live, like go out get a girlfriend and all that.
2006-12-25 04:57:48 · answer #8 · answered by Sue 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had 2 lazy girls and now I have 2 lazy young women
lazy kids grow up to be lazy adults
speak to your partner this problem needs to be resolved, kids can break you up, my daughter helped with both my new (now ex)husband and my 1st ex husbands wife (she messed with her head bad)
parents need to teach their children the right way, it takes effort, work together.
2006-12-25 07:37:45 · answer #9 · answered by deb m 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your wife will defend her kids. Lay low if you want to keep the peace.
2006-12-25 07:27:12 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋