Ok people-this is a Mom's house, Dad's house question!?

Question

Mom talking here. I let the kids do chores here with me like take out the trash, rinse off their plates and glasses. At Dad's he does the dishes and one of the boys takes out the trash. Daughter 13, Son 10, Son 9. Should I give them an allowance? I feel sorry for them over at Dad's! I don't want them to think they will always get some money whenever they are here. If so for their ages what would be a fair amount for each age?

Answer 1

Your explanation is confusing. If all they do at dads is one of them takes out the trash why do you feel sorry for them over there? sounds like they have a very easy life.
They hardly do any work at either house.

Answer 2

If you and their dad are on speaking terms i would say that you need to sit down and make a list of chores that is suitable for both houses so that they are not doing nothing at one and alot at the other. At 13 your daughter should be capable of doing the dishes and maybe something like vaccum 2 times a week or a few other chores. As for the boys they are 9&10 they are more than capable of taking out the trash maybe raking the yard helping with some of the chores!! I am not saying that on a daily basis that they should have a huge work load but if they are getting allowances then they should work for them so they dont think money grows on trees!! Also the amount of allowence they get should be based on how well they do their chores.I hope this helps it worked for me:)

Answer 3

Yes, I think children should get a set amount chores each week and I think kids should also get an allowance for doing these chores. It teaches them responsibilities. Now, since the children stay with both you and their father, I would work something out with the father to pay their allowance each week, this way the children are not getting too much money. You might device a plan where the children are expected to do their chores in each house and they will get an allowance from each house. The allowance that you give them can be spent on things they want and the allowance their father gives them can be placed in their own bank account. I can remember when my mom set up my first bank account and how important it made me feel. In the end, you will teach your kids responsiblities and the value of a dollar. Best of luck.

Answer 4

A parenting class suggested for allowance that they get $1 per school year, so : kindergarten would get $1; first grade ( with kindergarten) would get $2, and so on . But don't pay extra for doing their regular chores, and if they don't do their regular chores..auction them off to a sibling and pay them out of the child's allowance. Children learn early that every adult is different. They know what to expect from Dad and they know you are different from him. In later years, Dad may well regret his current choices, but you can not ,nor should you, try to compensate for his short comings. Try not to let the kids play one of you against the other. They are very smart and intuitive. Just give them all the love you can and when they misbehave.. love them all the more! Kids spell love= t i m e.

Answer 5

My kids are all grown now, with babies of their own, but I am raising one granddaughter who is 4, if she keeps her room tidy, puts her clothes in the hamper, and doesn't make messes all around the house, like most kids too, then she does get an allowance, $2.00 per week and I take her to the store and she can treat herself. You have to provide an incentive for the kids to clean up after themselves, then as they become adults it will all come naturally. One problem with young people when they go out on their own is, they don't know how to care for their own home, apartment or whatever, these habits that you are teaching they will have forever, if they use them. If not, oh well, your house may be cleaner. I would give the 13 yr old 10.00 per week, the 10 yr old 7.00 per week and the 9 yr old 6.00 per week.
But you should also encourage them to sort their laundry, clean their own rooms, sweep, dust, mop, or whatever you have to do.
You will be surprised how much more time you will have to yourself, and that is priceless. Gool Luck To You.

Answer 6

Growing up and helping around the house should NOT be rewarded with money. They live there also and the messes are there messes too, arnt they.?

They also should not be givin money for good grades they should get them because they are suppose to not because they get cash.

When it comes to an allowence the amount is really up to you. Do you feel they should be getting a certain amount or not.? The amount of money should help them learn how to save and how to spend.

Answer 7

Your question doesn't make much since, but I don't think that they should get an allowance if that is all they do. If you feel you must give one, only give the money for thing's they don't regularly do. The amount depends on what you are willing to give. Create a set amount, like $20 for mowing the grass (if it's a small yard), or $10 for washing the car. It all depends on you like I said before.

I grew up in a house that didn't believe in an allowance and I still did the everyday cleaning around the house along with my siblings.
I don't know why you should feel bad unless you think you are making them work hard at what they do, and their dad does everything for them at his house. If that's the case , you shouldn't feel bad. If not for you teaching them to clean up after themselves who will? They would eventually grow up to be slobs, and I know you wouldn't want that.

My husband is very messy and lazy when it comes to cleaning because he never had to do any of it for himself. I try to get him to understand he is not setting a good example for our child, but she happily helps me clean up, so maybe she is learning after all.
=)
So, I think what you are doing is good and they shouldn't get an allowance for it because that is a part of their everyday life.

Oh yeah, praise them for their good work, but don't bribe them to get the job done.

Answer 8

It all depends what they need it for.Ifit is for going out expensesthen twenty dollars max for the older child 15 and ten for the youngest. i would suggest that you encourage your children to bank the money for their futures.

Answer 9

Well, I don't think so because this keeps up for all the thing that you have done for them.