So I had been dating this guy for 8 months, my first serious boyfriend and first love. Our relationship had been ok, we did fight about things like the fact that he didn't trust me for no reason, that he wasn't over his ex when we first started dating, he lied to me, etc. We had our problems and after I came back from studying abroad over the summer, which we fought the whole time basically, I felt that enough was enough and I broke up with him 2 months after getting back. I didn't really realize until after we had broken up, but I wasn't happy. I had him get away with some things that really bothered me, but he hadn't realized there was that much problems cuz I hadn't let him know. However, since we have been broken up, we've come back and forth because I still really care about him and he's always wanted me back, i've been holding him in limbo, but not on purpose, but because I've been confused too. Recently I decided I wanted to give us another chance and was fully commited to ...
2006-12-24 17:42:57 · 8 answers · asked by soso98 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
... working hard on our problems and to try and give us a fair shot. I knew that we would have to work really hard at it cuz we both have issues with one another, but I thought it could be worth it. He agreed and we decided to try again. However, now I'm confused again. I don't want to play games with him and keep pulling him back and forth cuz I know its not fair at all. But I just don't know what to do. When I'm with him I'm happy and I love him so much, but when we are appart I think about all these things I don't like or things that bother me that he's done and then I'm not happy anymore. When we were broken up however I still wanted to talk to him and be with him and would got really jealous when he started flirting with another girl. Am I just wishing to be in a relationship? I'm so confused cuz just yesterday I was so happy when I was with him and now today I thinking it will never work. I also have major trust issues that I don't know that we can ever work through. I just ...
2006-12-24 17:43:46 · update #1
don't know what to do anymore, cuz I keep dragging him back and forth.
I could go on but I'll stop. Sorry for the long question. I'm just super confused.
2006-12-24 17:44:07 · update #2
It is difficult to leave some relationships because parts of it are so satisfying. However, serious relationships and marriage are even more difficult. If you are having this many problems now, you are in for an impossibly difficulty journey ahead.
Be brave and end this now. The worst thing you could do would be to stay with him.
Best of luck to you and stay strong.
2006-12-24 17:47:05 · answer #1 · answered by Johnny Q. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know that it's a lost cause, but I honestly think you have some things to think about inside yourself, and some growing to do before you will be in a place to make any relationship work successfully. It speaks well of you that you care about his feelings, and are concerned about hurting him, however I don't think it will work until you understand yourself a little better. Plus, this guy sounds like he has some issues of his own. I'd say your relationship is probably salvagable, but why bother until you figure yourself out, and he needs to do the same. Good luck.
2006-12-24 17:48:22 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think what you both need right now is time apart, without communication to confuse your feelings. Sit down and really examine the pros and cons of this relationship. Whether or not you think you can truly solve and move one from the problems you're enduring by being in this relationship.
2006-12-24 17:46:48 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm in your shoes, hon. Not a fun place to be in, I know...Im currently with that guy, and happy as can be. We just sat down, and made a list right then and there of what we needed to work on and what we wouldnt change. What was and was not okay. Then we worked together to fix it and stop whatever needed to be stopped. Good luck.
2006-12-24 17:54:10 · answer #4 · answered by R*A*N*D*O*M* 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes
2006-12-24 17:48:23 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why not kill him and have him stuffed then he could be the perfect companion? Otherwise it's time to call an end to this and cut him out of your life for a bit - then you'll be less confused.
2006-12-24 17:46:26 · answer #6 · answered by nkellingley@btinternet.com 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love him you have to hang in there and work on it. Relationships are not a cake walk. They take hard work and dedication. petty things will happen but if you're meant to be.........you will be...its that simple. love is not easy but it can overcome almost anything.
2006-12-24 17:47:28 · answer #7 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, in response to your very long question. Get over it. You just seem so unfit for each other.
2006-12-24 17:47:54 · answer #8 · answered by seek_fulfill 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋