ok ive been together with my man for 3 years going on to 4years. he lives in the other side of the world and i live in new zealand i spend around $200 every week just calling him and he wants me to send him gifts and money and everything but i cant afford it im a student and im studying and for xmas hes giving me hard times which is not good at all i love him and all but at times i think hes ussing me for money and everything he works he earns good money and im broke cos im still studying he controlls. if i want to cut my hair he would have a big drama over it he doesnt want me to dress up like putting on make up and what i normal do he thinks im a ***** when i do that so yeah im confess on what i should do cos i tem to always call him and always get hurt and i still do it
2006-12-24 17:22:19 · 13 answers · asked by lena 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
His abuse is mild now. It will likely worsen with time. You should immediately terminate all contact with him and never speak to him again. He does not love you.
2006-12-24 17:24:26 · answer #1 · answered by Johnny Q. 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
He is using you.... Cut off all ties, change your number, and be done with him, you don't even get the satisfaction of hugging him holding him or kissing him on a daily basis ( the way he sounds would you really want to anyway ?) For all you know you could be supporting another relationship with all the money and gifts you send him.
he doesn't love you he loves the control he has over you even with you being half way around the world
Your young you'll find someone else someone maybe in the same state/ town as you and they will treat you a million times better,
Stop sending this man anything !! I am sure you can be spending 200 on something more usefull than a guy bad mouthing you when you speak to him
ciao
2006-12-25 01:30:42 · answer #2 · answered by drkbabe73 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The reason he hurts you is because you keep letting him. The reason you keep letting him is because you are addicted to your emotions.You've become your own worst enemy in dealing with this user. He knows he can get away with abusing you because you do nothing to put a stop to it. After all these years don't you think you have had enough already? Shame on you for letting this go on for so long. Can't you see that this relationship is killing you? He is using your sense of guilt to control you while inflicting a terrible burden on your life. Why are you allowing yourself to be shackled to him in such a demeaning manor? How can you say that you love someone who treats you like you're less than a human being? Makes no sense! No reason for it either.
The first thing you need to do is quit referring to him as "your man". He is not anything to you but a selfish domineering ego centric pathological tyrant who cares nothing about you. The fact that he is so far away from you makes this arrangement even more disturbing. Don't you ever wonder what he is up to with him being on the other side of the world? You can't actually believe that he is being honest with you. Seems like the writing is written plainly on the wall. Unless, the sooner the better, that you stop this unrealistic one sided connection with him, he will totally suck the life completely out of you leaving you high and dry. Like he is doing to you now. You will be left with nothing. Like you have now.
2006-12-25 04:39:52 · answer #3 · answered by quantumview 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you already know the answer. This guy is no good for you. If you want to find happiness, you need to break free from him, and start again. The sad truth is that people don't change, and if you are hurt and miserable (understandably, from what it sounds like) you need to leave him. No more money, no more calls. It will be tough, but you aren't happy.....find someone who makes you feel like a Queen, not an ATM.
2006-12-25 01:26:33 · answer #4 · answered by niwriffej 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
lena ,
I think this guy knows that you love him and he's taking advantage of you ,you need to end your relation with him which I dont think would be easy for you because you love him so if you cant just break off the relation then start being abit tough with him and let him know that he doesnt own you and you have the right to do what makes you happy and feel good ..
2006-12-25 01:30:03 · answer #5 · answered by Mysterious 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If your sister or best friend was telling you that her man treats her this way, what would you tell her?
You don't love him, you're addicted to him or co-dependent. Its a nasty word but, read up on it. It's an eye opener. No one in their right mind would allow themselves to be treated this way - OVER THE PHONE no less.
2006-12-25 01:32:12 · answer #6 · answered by Ade 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him. He's controlling and using you, and you should have more respect for yourself, to allow someone to treat you that way. If he truly loves you, he'll change his ways. But until then, get out, and live your life.
2006-12-25 01:25:39 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Get yourself a real life and dump him. He's a control freak.
2006-12-25 01:29:27 · answer #8 · answered by ringwood_ray 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
stop calling him for a few days make him call you put him down hurt him i know that it will hurt you e-mail him save your money
2006-12-25 01:37:55 · answer #9 · answered by davermon 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
kick his *** don't talk to him anymore and get a new strong boyfriend and tell that new zealand guy we're through
2006-12-25 01:24:55 · answer #10 · answered by chingun_g 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋