Here is my situation: I went to a jewelry store with no intention of buying anything with my friend. I then saw a lovely emerald ring that I could not pass up. Since I just went with my friend, I did not bring my debit card. When she saw how much I wanted that ring, she offered to lend me the $1700.00 to buy it, since she knew that I had the money and would pay her back. I accepted; she put it on her credit card, and the NEXT day I transfered the exact amount to her bank account so she could apply it to her credit card or do with it what she wanted. Here is the issue: my mother thinks that I was rude to accept a loan from a friend! She says under no circumstances is it acceptable in the wonderful world of ettiquette! I personally don't see a problem, since the debt was so quickly repaid; neither does my friend. Am I wrong? Any suggestions?
2006-12-24 13:04:33 · 24 answers · asked by 123 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Just to let you all know, before you start judging, it was a ring I could afford, and it wasn't going to put me in great debt... I just didn't have the funds at the time of the transaction. :)
2006-12-24 13:06:34 · update #1
You are not wrong. You paid it back, and it was a fair deal. Its ok, all mothers are from the "olden days" and have no clue of modern life.
2006-12-24 13:08:04 · answer #1 · answered by itz_erika_yo 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I think it depends a lot on the situation: How well do you know the friend? Do you have the means to pay it back? Has the friend borrowed from you before? Did they repay you? Have you discussed borrowing/lending before?
In addition, I think a lot depends on your own level of comfort with the transaction; if you were comfortable borrowing the money, and your friend was comfortable lending it (I assume she was, since she offered the money), then I don't think there is a problem. Personally, I don't see why it was such a big deal. Sure, it was a somewhat large amount of money, but you had the funds in the bank, you paid it back at the soonest possible time and you got the ring you wanted. End of story. Friends help each other, and sometimes that means helping financially, especially when it's a very temporary situation, like yours.
Also, you (and your mother) must remember that the transaction occured between you and your friend. It was a personal matter, and if you're both satisfied with the outcome, then it was a correct decision.
2006-12-24 17:31:24 · answer #2 · answered by snowpuppies 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There's nothing wrong with borrowing money from a friend. Since she offered the money to you, I'd say you're a really responsibly young lady. Your mother just sounds like she needs to get over the fact that you've grown up and you're a big girl now.
2006-12-24 13:07:13 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why not buy a 45 dollar ring instead and give the balance of the money to people who can't even afford the #3 meal at McDonald's? The real problem is not that you borrowed money, but rather that you need to spend 1.7K for a ring. You can be forgiven for this problem but you must address it sometime.
2006-12-24 13:09:20 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I shouldn't bring your mom into it unless she has tabs on your finances. Everything was done correctly and no problem came up. Friends often times end up hateing each other because one borrows money from another. I wouldn't try it with any other friend. You seem to be good friends with her so, try not to make it a habit. If it is worth having, it will be there when you get you debit card and get it yourself.
2006-12-24 13:09:40 · answer #5 · answered by myangelbarry 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i disagree .pride is the only thing that would prevent people from accepting money from a friend .but if you could not have paid her back in a timely fashion that could have cause big problems.especially since it was for a trinket and not for something important like rent or food.
2006-12-25 01:26:31 · answer #6 · answered by zachary b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can't agree with your mom here. the lender is your friend and is the one who OFFERED to lend. And you paid her so promptly. What then can be the issue? I think your mom could have felt you bought an expensive item on impulse and (more than anything else) she didn't like that?
2006-12-24 13:16:26 · answer #7 · answered by PikC 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There's nothing wrong with it if she offerd.Plus,she was the one generous enough to loan you the money.But just to prove it to your mom that it wasn't inproper ettiquette,wear the ring all the time,plus you really like it, so it shouldn't bother you.
2006-12-24 13:15:18 · answer #8 · answered by •nel• 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You paid it right away, I don't see any problem. About the ring, if you really like it, who am I, to judge. I'm like you, if I like something and I can afford it, I buy with out question.
2006-12-24 13:19:22 · answer #9 · answered by linda c 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to give up on your mothers advice if it's going to be so wrong. Did your friend feel put out? I doubt it. There is no such thing as bad etiquette if nobody feels uncomfortable or confused.
2006-12-24 15:13:10 · answer #10 · answered by N/A 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋