My ex is coming back into my life....we were always on and off and now my bf is kinda jealous....what do i do?

Question

I 4got to mention that my ex and i are JUST FRIENDS! but he wants more...i dont. im very happy with my bf but my ex keeps hugging me on purpose in front of my bf...my bf is jealous and its not cuz im hugging another guy its cuz its my ex....my ex is trying to get back together but no-matter what i do or say to get him away he wont leave me alone...i dont want to hurt him cuz hes my friend

Answer 1

well, i can tell you from experience, last year i had surgery and was laid up for a while, couldnt do anything socially, my gf (now ex) started hanging out with her "male friend of 20 years" (who she also had a brief sexual relationship with years ago) and everytime i called to see if we could spend time together she was with him or had plans with him, and we were always inseperable. this hurt me extremely until she finally dumped me, before the surgery i was ready to ask her to marry me. Now i am a very bitter person towards her, and dont want to ever care about or love another person ever again. My advice to you is if you really care and love your boyfriend, then you should be with him, not your ex, you ex may want (but not tell you) to work things out with you and try and force his way back into your life completely. I have always tried to keep a friendship with my ex's, but hardly talk to each other, maybe on a birthday or holiday. but that is it, and if you really love where you are at now, you will keep this exbf away from you, especially because your current bf may get jealous and angry with you regadless if anything is hapening or not, he will start to lose trust and the relationship will start to disolve

Answer 2

Dad~~Your son is a man. Twenty years is justification of this. Tell your son he must wait OUTSIDE your house and tell him that it's nothing against him, but that his mother has no business in your home. She could go through your paperwork without your knowledge. That would be like my husband's ex entering our home. The thought of that ever happening sends chills down my spine. I'd be beating feet reporting her for trespassing. I don't hesitate with such circumstances, but that's my personality. I am a bit confrontational. For those who are less confrontational, it's best to lay out the ground rules with the ones you love, i.e. your son, and let him know that if he wants to continue to live there without being asked to look for another place to live, he must abide by your house rules and that includes, above all, that ex-wifey need not enter your domain, and should he break this rule, you will have no other choice than to ask him to leave. If that doesn't work, you can always talk to her. That would be my first move. If she doesn't honor that, get a restraining order. Surely, she's become somewhat of a reasonable person after all these years. Or not. Whatever the case, you must take measures to stop it. The ball is really in your court and you are responsible for putting your foot down. Not your son and, certainly, not your ex-wife~~you. Good luck. I hope she doesn't give you too much trouble. Don't worry. There are a lot of us out here in the great red white and blue that are having to remedy problems with ppl's ex's.

Answer 3

Huh? "Kinda jealous ... "? I think there is good reason he is "jealous". It sounds like you don't know if you want the "good old days" or "the new life".
You should have very clear boundaries of acceptable behavior with ex. No matter what your feelings are towards ex or bf, you should make it plain to ex you aren't' "available" at the present. This isn't just for bf, it's also for yourself. Don't forget ex knows you very well, so he knows which buttons to press to make you laugh and bring up happy memories.
You need to write down the reasons why you keep splitting with ex because memory can plays tricks and makes things happier than they were.
Always think of the long term. Do you want to be "on and off" for the next 20 years?

Answer 4

Talk to your bf, tell him what the deal is with your ex. If you feel you have or still have feelings for your ex, you need to let your bf know, and also let him go. Just don't be surprised if you and your ex are off again, and your bf won't take you back.

Answer 5

What do you mean by your ex coming back into your life? Of course your boyfriend is going to be jealous. You would be, too, if his ex was "coming back into his life." Unless you are still in love with your ex, tell him goodbye and good riddance. If you are in love with your ex, then break up with your boyfriend. It isn't fair to your boyfriend to be stringing him along. Just remember, there is a reason you broke up with your ex in the first place, and it will probably happen again.

Answer 6

Well if you would just like to b friends with ur ex tell ur bf that and that u love nobody but him in that way......tell him ur ex is just a friend unless u feelclose to ur ex again then u need to get rid of the bf and go back to ur ex if u feel that way about him....

:)

Answer 7

also remember the reasons why you and your ex would break up and then get together again... was it worth it?

weigh the pros and cons and decide who you want in your life, your ex or your bf.

a wise person i know always says, "make a decision and don't regret it"

so make a choice and dont look back thinking what could have been if you had made a different choice.

Answer 8

Wouldn't it be better to spend time with your boyfriend and leave the ex alone. This is a good way to lose your boyfriend.

Answer 9

Ur gonna have to choose who'd you rather be with ur not going to have both but on and off relationships aren't healthy in most cases so maybe its time to let the ex go.

Answer 10

Does your bf now know of him?? Talk to him and let him know the background of your old relationship....If you are not doing anything wrong, you have nothing to be worried about..