My 16 yr bro recently dropped out of school and is hanging with the wrong crowd. What can I do to help him?

Question

By the way he hates me and hardly ever talks to me, but we do live together with my dad.

Answer 1

Don't give up on him. He's hopefully just going through a stage. It might sound sappy, but, let him know that you love him by saying so. If he feels like someone really cares he might decide to change his ways. I would just try to keep a close eye on him and see to it that he doesn't mess up too badly. You might invite him to hang out with you when you do stuff with your friends. This might be painful now but will pay off in the long run.

Answer 2

I don't necessarily think that anyone should make the judgement that you are a bad parent only on a single dimension. However, you need to honestly ask yourself whether or not you had your daughter's best interests in mind when you made that decision. Perhaps you are just not aware of how important school is. Even if she doesn't go to college immediately, it is a stepping-stone for the future, and some jobs (even non-skilled jobs) require a hs diploma. Were there reasons other than your own needs that prompted you to remove your daughter from school? If so, then tell people what they were. If it was a selfish move, then I would implore you to consider re-enrolling her. Otherwise, you can look into alternatives such as a GED course, or some community colleges have programs where you go a couple of days per week and get a diploma that way (an actual diploma, not a GED). The point is, if you want something to tell people to get them off your back, then you need to be doing something to ensure that she has options in the future. What if this guy doesn't pan out? Or what if she doesn't want to marry him?

Answer 3

I always hate to hear questions like this, I know this is so hard on you , and not being able to communicate with him makes it even worse.. I know my younger daughter , could find nothing but the wrong crowd, until she became the wrong crowd herself, with her older sister trying everything she could to stop her . We did everything imaginable , but I will have to say not much helped .. My older daughter's friends would keep her filled in on what my daughter was doing and in turn she would let me know. The battle was on for several years.. I do mean battle .. But she really had to fall down and not just once , before realizing the people she was calling her friends were really not friends at all. I hope your Dad can help you. Let him know everything , two head's are always better than one to deal with issues like this.. I was thankful that my daughter finally came around. They say if we're lucky the person will finally grasp the morals and standards they were raised by .. Now it was now a fast or easy thing, but we did hang in there through thick and thin .. Just thank the good Lord she came out of the mess, with a normal brain still in tact ..

I really do feel your pain in this situation, you feel helpless.. just hang in there, tell him things, whether he want's to hear them or not,, What do you have to lose, someone that think's they don't' like you anyway.. At least you will have given it your all..

This is a Great Question !!!!!!!!!!
So Many ,, Too Many Families Are Going Through This Same Situation .. I know they will be happy to read all the responses you receive..

The Best Of Luck To You
One Day He Will Be Thankful For His Big Sister

Merry Christmas

Answer 4

I have talked in prisions and even spent a night there as part of a program to help the youth. It is not the place to be but sounds like he is headed that way. Have him visit a local boys and girls clubs to speak with a mentor. If you know a police officer in the family etc, have them take him to a prison for a visit. If he is there long enough he will see that hanging out with the wrong crowd has not positives.

Answer 5

Oh man... well, you'll have to start getting him to realize that you love and care about him. Start off by smiling at him, even if he doesn't smile back, and greeting him even if he doesn't return the greeting. Like, wake up in the morning and tell him, "Good morning!" or something. Then when you leave home or he leaves home, wish him a wonderful day. Before going to sleep, go to his room with a pleasant smile on your face and tell him, "Good night and sweet dreams! I'll see you tomorrow, ok?" Through this, he'll hopefully realize that you care about his well being. So then gradually start small conversations with him. Like, ask him how his day went, how his friends are doing, and who his friends are. Then tell him that he should start hanging out with better friends, friends who seriously care about him and will want good for him and won't let him get in trouble..... I know, I know, none of this is gonna be easy.... Also, you might wanna find better people yourself, and ask them to hang out with your brother if he'd agree; do this after he starts talking to you and realizes that you love him.

Answer 6

Don't help him. Let him fall down and hit his face on the curb... Just be there to help him up without saying I told you so. People need to make mistakes for themselves before they really realize how stupid of a decision it was to make. I don't see a way you can approach him and say something like "little brother look I know we don't talk and you hate me, but I think it would be best if you stayed in school and stopped hanging out with the hooligans you do" ... He'd most likely continue to do it to spite you. He's probably doing it now to get a rise out of your family. So let him do it... he'll realize sooner than later that he's ******* up and you'll just need to help him get back on track. It'll hurt to have to see him suffer but the mistake we make as people who care for someone is not to let them feel that pain.

Answer 7

Talk to your dad about this situation if it escalates without any help, this is going to worsen. No matter what, if he won't listen, you just grab him and talk to him. Knock some sense into him. Yell at him. Do what you have to do. Really, because he'll just turn out doing drugs or what not soon. Try and make your dad move....thats impossible but its a chance. Best wishes!

Answer 8

You should talk over your concerns with your father and let him know what's going on.

Sometimes parents aren't paying attention and things get by them.

Let your brother know that even though you guys don't get along you love him and you're there for him. It might be better if you send him a little letter.

Answer 9

Let your Dad know. Try not to worry, he will have to hit bottom a bit before he lands on his feet. He is making his own choices. The best thing you can do is to keep "yourself" on the straight and narrow.

Good-Luck

Answer 10

Talk to his friends. Ask them to help him out. If you have the cajonees try to sit him down and give him a serious conversation. If that dosen't work Beat the **** out of him, call him a dumbass and force him to go back to school.