I have a ex boyfriend who is deployed. We have been on again off again since he has been deployed. I love him very much but the whole situation is not one that i want to be in..One minute Im the love of his life. The next he doesnt see a future with me. I ask him to comment to something more but he tells me to be patient. Im at the end of my rope. I know how he gets when things aint right with us..I want him to stay focus but I want to make a clean break without feeling guilty. He is the love of my life but I need more..Am I selfish for wanting more from a man who is deployed
2006-12-24 06:28:23 · 5 answers · asked by SOLIDERGUY 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
No, you're not selfish at all, BUT his first love and priority in his life will always be his calling to serve his country. He has no say in where and when they deploy. If you want someone who can give you his time, love and affection then go for an civillian...
Let him go, 2007 is around the corner, do you really want to waste another year in relationship limbo with him when the guy you wanted could have been there in the wings all along???
2006-12-24 06:32:53 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're not selfish for wanting a comitment. You know what you want and you deserve it! The fact that he is in the military does not matter at all. Two people can have a loving commited relationship despite distance and occupation. I come from a long line of military families, who have sustained a close heathly relationship no matter how much time a year was spent apart. Being emotionally strong and close does not depend on how physically close you are. My opinion is..you should be with a person who is as in love with you as you are with him. It seems as though he is not willing to make a commitment. If that's the case, I feel it would be in your best interest to find a better match for yourself. Someone who is on the same page as you, someone who wants to be with you as much as you want to be with him. This is what you deserve and you shouldn't settle for less!
2006-12-24 14:38:14 · answer #2 · answered by Polly K 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you're not selfish. You're just examing your heart. Take this time to pray for his healthy return and ask yourself "Does he know how you feel?"
If he does, then write him and (without pressure) remind him. Give him time. What he's doing for the country overrides you two getting back together "right now".
He needs to focus on his job.
If he doesn't know how you feel, take your time to really think about if he is what you really want.
Depending on where he's at and how long he's been there (Use your good judgement) write him a no pressure letter or email.
Wait for a response. Like I said, he's doing an important job and may not be able to deal with it right now.
2006-12-24 14:41:40 · answer #3 · answered by Havana Brown 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i understsand that you want more of a commitment from him right now but if he not pushing for that right then you need to drop it bcause he has things that he needs to focus on.
2006-12-24 14:34:19 · answer #4 · answered by OB the Wolf 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no. Move on. He won't commit
2006-12-24 14:31:29 · answer #5 · answered by shania3949 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋