I am in a serious relationship with a guy, and probably in a couple months me and my daughter will be moving with him...My daughter's dad is somehow trying to control me with this...Any advice please....
2006-12-24 05:01:13 · 21 answers · asked by NeNe 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Her dad sees her at least every other weekend, and the guy I'm seeing now is GREAT..He says he would take her as if she were his own, and he has a son as well...
2006-12-24 05:09:57 · update #1
Thanks everyone for the answers....EXCEPT MissMojo22, I asked for advice not a lecture
2006-12-24 05:17:11 · update #2
yes
2006-12-24 05:03:26 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 2⤋
This depends on what type of custody you have. If you have sole custody (especially legal custody) he has no say in the matter. If you have joint custody, he can try to make this a miserable situation for you. Your child's father can only keep your child away from this new man if the guy you are seeing has issues such as a drug addiciton, alcoholism, abusive tendencies, or something like that. It is very hard to prove and your daughter's father would have to do so in court. It would also help if your relationship is a long-term one where you have been together for quite a while before you move in together. Also, make sure the place you move in to is in good condition with a separate room for your daughter if possible. If your daughter's father wants to do anything about this, he'd have to take it up in court. In that case, I would try to seek some legal aid on the best way to handle it. Just keep your cool when it comes to dealing with him and write down anything he may say that could be seen as threatening or cruel. And keep your chin up!
2006-12-24 05:12:47 · answer #2 · answered by RNFQueen 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes and No, You are not together he can not tell you what to do (even if you were together you're your own person) As far as his daughter he can. He is her father, he has a right to be concerned where she lives and who is around her. How would you feel if he had her and he was moving in with another girl? You would feel a lil uncomfortable with that.. you dont want your daughter growing up thinking thats her real mom cuz you live with her.. you are her mother and he should trust you in making good decsions. Talk to him about it.
My best advice would be to get custody papers. You want to be the primary care taker. (meaning she lives with you) Most cases get Joint legal and shared physical custody, in cases where a parent can be proven to be unfit the other parent will get sole custody. Id suggest being the first one to file.....
2006-12-24 05:14:42 · answer #3 · answered by Chunkerbutt 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
as her dad he certainly does have a right to have a say who is around his child. You need to talk to him and find out what it is about the guy that makes him nervous. He may only be jealous of another person seeing his daughter every day. if that is the case you need to reassure him that he will still be her dad and very much a part of her life. I think it is unfair to assume he is trying to control you.
2006-12-24 05:07:09 · answer #4 · answered by Pandora 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If her father is only acting out of love for his daughter. Let her father know she only has one dad and that is him. Your knew guy can be a step father but never her dad. Daughters should have a special bond with their daddy's. After all that is how they learn how a man should treat them when they get older.
2006-12-24 05:18:22 · answer #5 · answered by ? 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No he doesn't have any right when it comes to who you're taking her around, unless the person is obviously harmful to the child and he can prove that, then he'd have a right to intervene but if the man you are seeing is good to her and your ex has no reason to judge him then you just need to explain to him that until he can honestly show you that the guy isn't fit to be around your daughter then he needs to back off.
2006-12-24 05:25:11 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
A father should be concerned about his children, and he has a right to be. If he is being unreasonable, that's another thing. Should he be concerned about your new guy? Try to see this from his point of view. And talk to him, it might not be fun but she's his daughter too.Anything should be about what's best for her. Merry Christmas
2006-12-24 05:08:04 · answer #7 · answered by Crash 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
his worry is normal i would say,,left with just you she was fine and dandy but this new man ,,he doesnt know him to know what he is like let alone what he will be like with your daughter,,as long as you can look him in the face and say you know he maybe worried but there is nothing to worry about he will have to trust you know what you are doing and that any decisions regarding the welfare of your daughter is of paramount importance to you.you and he are no longer together and any say in your life can only be in regards to your daughter and if she is safe and happy he should wish you well.
2006-12-24 05:17:40 · answer #8 · answered by lex 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Unless there is a reason to suspect that the guy you are seeing will harm your daughter in any way, the birth father really does not have any say in the matter.
2006-12-24 05:05:41 · answer #9 · answered by M.A.X. 3 · 3⤊ 2⤋
If your daughter is safe, and happy, and her needs are taken care of, then I would say no, he has no right to tell you how to live your life, that is control, and that is wrong! good luck.
2006-12-24 05:24:50 · answer #10 · answered by ball_courtney 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He has a right to say only because he can open his mouth.
Legally, if you have custody, I don't think there's a problem.
I just sounds like he wants you miserable and wants to controll your lives.
2006-12-24 06:27:57 · answer #11 · answered by neserit_luncast 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋