I do not celebrate christmas...for many reasons. I personally boycott the cumpulsory spending spree our culture goes into even moreso this time of year. But I cannot control other's spending which leaves me in a bind. I do not shop but occasionally I get gifts, most which is just "stuff" I don't want. I do consider the time and effort involved and do not turn down anything anyone made ie cooked or handcrafted. I already have a houseful of things and do not need more. I warn everyone I know that I do not wish gifts for xmas but a few still seep through. How do I gracefully refuse them? Should I just donate the items or do I stand my ground and flat out refuse to accept it?
2006-12-24 02:50:49 · 16 answers · asked by teeyodi 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
that's kind of tricky subject. i would explain to the person that is giving you the gift that you appreciate the thought and effort but you choose not to except gifts. if still want to get you something suggest that make a donation to a charity that represents something you stand for (ex. St. Jude's Hospital, the Humane Society, etc.) Another suggestion would be to ask them to give the gift to a child who would not otherwise receive anything. The could donate it to a local children's shelter or hospital and even Toys for Tots/Teens. If they're truely giving in the spirt of friendship they will understand and respect your wishes.
2006-12-24 03:12:08 · answer #1 · answered by Mutly 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If they already know you don't accept gifts, then make sure as soon as you open it, you tell them where you will be donating it to. Make a fuss about the gift so they will feel good, but stand your ground about not accepting it for yourself.
You could also tell them that next year they could just donate some money to charity in your name, instead of giving a gift. Let them know you appreciate this much more because of your personal beliefs. I personally love to give people gifts (not just for Xmas) and I think my feelings would be hurt if I felt the person wouldnt even open it. I also would respect their wishes when it was quite clear they wouldnt keep anything I bought them.
2006-12-24 11:39:46 · answer #2 · answered by Rebecca A 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think telling them you cannot accept them and that you will donate any that you get is a good answer. This way some may think twice about it. Keep in mind that there are still those that will get you something anyway. Many out there feel they have to give something to all family & friends during this holiday. How could they give gifts to all their friends and leave you out? It's a guilt that some people out there can't live with, I guess. For me it's simply too much pressure....
2006-12-24 10:59:19 · answer #3 · answered by Mike H 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Accepting the gifts will only encourage the people to buy you another one next year and possibly expect one in return. I would advise you to stand your ground and refuse the gifts. Make sure to explain that you do not celebrate christmas and do not give or accept gifts. Suggest that the giver donate the gift to charity or make a monetary contribution in your name if they want to get you something.
2006-12-24 10:55:43 · answer #4 · answered by fat_albert_999 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why do you feel need to create an incident? Your issues are not limited to unwanted gifts.
It's Christmas. Just take the damn thing and say thank you. Donate it to the Good Will or throw it in the trash later if you wish.
I know you don't want to. We all do things we don't really want to do. Put your big-boy drawers on and deal with it.
And try to have a good holiday.
2006-12-24 11:15:22 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Refusing a gift may hurt the other person's feelings. If they have gone out of their way to get something for you and you say, no thank you, I don't want it, they may get offended. This has happened to me at times, I've given gifts to people but they have given them back to me and told me they don't use it. Proper gift ettiquette is to receive the gift and thank them. Maybe at another occasion, you should try and mention to them that you completely respect that they celebrate Christmas and you think it's only fair that they respect your decision to NOT celebrate it. Explain to them that you appreciate their gifts and you do not mean to offend them or hurt them but it is just a personal choice you have made in your life. I hope this helps!
2006-12-24 10:56:02 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Take them and unwrap them and give to someone that need and appreciate them. This way you help someone and yet protect your integrity by them not being Gift Wrapped. When I give a gift like this, I tell the people; "Look what I found on the side of the road! I not need it, you want it"?
2006-12-24 11:01:53 · answer #7 · answered by Snaglefritz 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
some people might think that accepting a gift is selfish, but refusing it is more selfish.. if it makes someone happy to give you a gift and you refuse it, you're going to make them unhappy for your own sense of pride.. if you want to donate it later, that's up to you, but you should at least open it and pretend to be happy..
2006-12-24 10:59:20 · answer #8 · answered by Byakuya 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Accept them but don't reciprocate. Most of them will stop giving when they don't receive back. Donate the items you don't want to charity. Problem solved.
2006-12-25 03:36:06 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will be the gracious one by ACCEPTING the gift (regardless of your personal belief) Then do what you will with it....donate, re-gift, etc)
2006-12-24 11:03:07 · answer #10 · answered by Janet 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋