How to overcome shyness with the ladies?

Question

I suck at finding a girlfriend. I am a very shy person who also does not have much to conversate on when talking to attractive women. I mean I can start off talking about the basic stuff such as her age, where she's from, and whether she is single or not etc. I get lost after that and don't know where else to go from there. I am tired of being the only one lonesome and desperate for a relationship.

Answer 1

Being desperate never helps, we can tell, and we get turned off because we wonder "why is he so desperate? Is there something wrong with him?" We like men with confidence!

Maybe pretending you have confidence can work. How are your acting skills?

You need to find a woman who has something in common with you so you can both yap about the same thing and get closer, something you are comfortable in.

What are your hobbies? Can you find a place to perform these hobbies? Working out? Arts? Dog walking? Church? Something where you will be sure to meet women.

Also, so you don't seem desperate, don't put pressure on yourself. Tell yourself "this is just a practice, to get over my shyness" and just strike up a convo with some random woman. Even pick one that you aren't attracted to, so you won't feel scared at all. Eventually you'll gain confidence when you see how easy it can be to just talk.

Good luck! Practice makes perfect ;)

Answer 2

i think u are taking this like it is a term test u are studying questions 2 ask her and responses etc etc. try this

1 stay loose
2.don't concentrate on her body while u are talking 2 her 2 make u less nervous
3 don't ask her her age that's embarrassing 2 girls
4 talk in general Q's that a conversation could come out of like if she saw a movie called ______ (that u have seen) and talk about it or music or what ever
5 don't think of her as this person that will hit u with a hammer if u make a small slip of the tongue if u say something dumb just go o well and correct yourself
6 if she shows a interest ask her out u cant be always asking her routine Q's (i have a hunch this is were u go wrong)

this is suppose 2 be fun (well it is 2 me when i talk 2 girls) have fun man

Answer 3

just start by talking about her ask her all sorts of questions like what does she do for a living what is her favorite movie, book, holiday's whatever as long as it's about her then she will know that u are more interested in getting to know them then getting down their pants trust me i know i'm a woman and i know how women think, unfortuniately i gave up men for a wonderful woman but still i know what women want
good luck

Answer 4

After you go throught the formalities, find out her interests. Ask questions, be attentive and above all get her to tell you about herself and what she wants out of life and so on. The best way to get people interested in you is to be interested in them first.

Answer 5

40000 Cured Social Anxiety - http://SocialAnxiety.uzaev.com/?OLXK

Answer 6

Get naked in front of a group of girls and stay there for a while. Your starting trouble will be gone for ever.

Answer 7

c'mon I'm sure you're not the only one in this situation! be more easy on yourself dude. That's where you start from... build up confidence in yourself, if you don't like yourself how can someone else like you??

Answer 8

Wear some spandex shorts and the next time a GIRL is lookin at you.....Start Stroking your B0NER and POINT to her......She will get the POINT...






answered by kast

Answer 9

hello before I am also like you shy lady , when you have one girlfiend , you will dont shy , when I get married , I will is get better .

Answer 10

First of all, I recommend you visit this site: www.sosuave.net its a totally free forum to discuss "How to become a Don Juan". go to the "DJ Bible" section and read all free books there. there is one that contains an 8 week self-training program called "DJ Boot Camp". download it and read it. it helps.
OK now here's what I have to tell you personally.
you have perobabely heard these whenever you asked for help:"don't expect everyone to like you. stop watching yourself from other people's eyes. and stop worrying what they think of you." Well I don't think this advice makes so much sense. How can ANYBODY who calls himself a human-being, stop monitoring other people's opinion about himself?! they give you that advice to help you repress the shyness. but I know it won't work cuz its crap. the very moment you hear it you feel this.
I got an alternative advice. You have to realize that shyness never reaches its aim. isn't shyness trying to protect us from making a fool of ourselves? isn't it there to protect us from the pain of being rejected? can you define any other purpose for this feeling? OK now has it EVER been successful in its goal? I mean, the only thing that can lead us make a fool of ourselves is feeling shy. the only thing that can cause us suck at making friends or attracting girls is feeling shy. So, the very moment you feel shy, you gotta remember this. Anything this shyness, this fear, is trying to protect you from, is just brought about only if you feel shy. Are you with me here? You always feel you are not good enough for otheres (specially girls) to like you. when you are trying to be accepted and liked by those you like, you always feel there's something wrong with you. that very moment, know that the only thing wrong with you is being shy. and nothing else. You have a whole lot to converse on. deep down, you are a real charmer. surprised? don't be. cuz EVERY MAN knows by instinct how to attract women. the very face that you are a man guarantees it. just like it guarantees that you have a dick. a man is not just a human being with a dick. he is BORN with everything that defines a MAN both physically and mentally.now the only thing that is keeping you from being in contact with your instincts, is that you are DISTRACTED by fear. so instead of just being your masculin self and naturally attracting the girl and enjoying every moment of the conversation, (which is indeed the only reason for the girl to enjoy it), you are constantly struggling with yourself, trying to escape rejection. that's why the conversation will feel either so forced or so borig, or you may just seem so inconfident, the girl senses that, and you WILL actually get rejected. see what I mean when I say the only thing that's wrong with you is your shyness? even if I make a bad mistake and say something really stupid and everyone start laughing at me, feeling shy will be the second mistake cuz it will just make me look even more stupid and it will make them laugh more at me.
The reason I'm writing these is that when we are feeling shy, we are some how believeing that its advantageous and it is protecting us from saying something stupid. that's why we listen to it. But you need to constantly remind yourself that the benefits we seek be feeling shy are illusions. and the only thing keeping us from reaching those benefits is shyness. when ever you feel shy, remind you of this and REPRESS your shyness. don't argue with it. don't try it convince it that you shouldn't feel shy cuz you're doing the right thing. no, just repress is. of course, you won't be able to think of all this and manage your feelings at the moments of extreme social anxiety. but at situations when your fear isn't at its extreme, when you're feeling just a little bit shy, you are are really able to repress the shyness. and when you're all alone by your self, remind your self of why you should repress shyness. remind yourself of the fact that if you make the first mistake and say something foolish, feeling shy would be the second mistake. do this when you're all alone, like when you are going to sleep. this way when the moment comes, you know why you are repressing your shyness. and if you keep doing this repression thing long enough, your moments of etreme anxiety will decrease in intensity. and you will be able to do it in a wider range of situations that you can't right now cuz you just freak out.
and don't expect anything to help you overnight. just to see smallest results you gotta keep doing this for at least 2 months.
set reminders for your self. put some code-word on the wall of your room, write it on your palm, if you have a cell-phone set reminders there. email your self. do anything it takes to help you remember what you should do.
when you are day dreaming, you will think of your awkward moments and feel shy. repress it. this is the easiest one!
and also its very important that you practice communication skills to awaken your instincts. try to talk to people. make eye contact. remember that you won't have a satisfying relationship with your beloved girl if you are not generally confident with people. its not just about girls. you first have to come out of your cage. you should be able to get along with people, both male and female easily. and you should enjoy it. it will take you quite a time to get there but its not impossible. don't escape situations that make you feel inconfident. even if you can't manage your feelings there, just being there is good for you. and don't forget to take that "DJ BOOT CAMP". just download it and do what it asks.
Fell free to contact me through Y! messenger or mail.
Best of wishes