he says he does so much more for me then i do for him. his examples are he pays for most of our dates, he drives everywhere( i cant drive yet) and he does things that i like for me. personally, i don't think theres anything more i can do. i pay every now and then, i offer to pay for his gas since i can't drive, i go to things that i absolutely hate because he likes it, and i do simple nice things for him all the time. am i a bad gf? is there anything else i can do or are his expectations too high? how can i get him to see what im doing.. why doesnt he appreciate anything i do?
2006-12-23 16:06:48 · 17 answers · asked by MissingLI21 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
i dun really think its ur fault
its either he lost interest in you
or hes cheating on you and he has another girl
in my opinion if my boyfriend said that to me i would just break it off
seriously u do as just as much as he does for you
2006-12-23 16:09:20 · answer #1 · answered by wassup_94 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Might not be financial stuff, might be the intimate part....maybe he wants more affection, more 'i love you'. Or he's just a spoiled brat. Supposedly he must have this idea that he plays his part by being a gentlemen (supposedly), paying for stuff driving...stuff that really isn't HIS part...and YOUR part might be being affectionate and complimentive..cause honestly only an idiot would say that, knowing you can't drive, you probably make less money, and don't know much of what he likes or wants...especially if he's saying that.
So talk to him, ask him what the hell he wants if you don't put out....is it intimate or is it financial, if it's financial then gladly put him in his place when you make him realize your status...and if it's intimate well you can't read his damn mind....EXPLAIN IT!
Communication is the best medicine for problems....that's how you get the best answers.
2006-12-23 16:27:16 · answer #2 · answered by Dennis 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, the two of you need to sit down and talk about what he thinks you are not putting into the relationship. Sounds to me like you are putting enough if not more into this thing. I think his expectations are too high. If the two of you are not living together, why does he expect so much from you? I cannot tell you to learn how to drive, because my 32 year old can but cannot pass the written test, therefore she doesn't have a license, and I was 32 before anybody cared enough to teach me. But I would sit down and talk to him and take it from there. Usually that helps, but if you feel his expectations of you are too much, maybe you might consider looking for someone else that cares. My ex was like that and we were married 18 yrs. And now my husband of 11 yrs. has tried the same thing and I finally got enough nerve to put my foot down and tell him to stop trying to control me and if he didn't like it he knew where the door was and not to let him hit him in the butt when he left. You need to be in control of your own life. If he loves you he will be willing to sit down and talk to you and try to help find a solution. Don't forget to put all your feelings on the table about what he does and why you find it unfair. Very rarely can you find a man that can tell you he appreciates you and what you do for him.
2006-12-23 16:24:38 · answer #3 · answered by myninny54 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He didn't say that you don't put any effort into the relationship, he said you don't put enough effort into it. He also didn't say he didn't appreciate or recognize the things that you do, so where are you pulling this out from? He's comparing what he does and what he puts into it to what you do. You might do things but what is it like compared to what he does? Is he more thoughtful, more giving than you? He's probably tired of the relationship being too one-sided and maybe feels that you don't show your appreciation to him.
2006-12-23 16:14:57 · answer #4 · answered by marklemoore 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if he's saying "no" to your gas money and everythign then thats his fault he's not taking it. what things do you ghat ehtat you do for him? if is sexual favors or uncomfortable situations then dont do then if you dont liek it! relationships are abotu compensating. noone can have everythign you want. you both have to do things that you liek and dislike.. you arent a bad gf. you shodl just sit down and talk. ask hi what else he wants form you and see if he says anythign that you havent realized yet.. if not then say a list an dhow you have been changing and you are trying to put as much effort intot he relationship. (more than before) i hope things get better. but id tell you to leave him! but i know 2 years is a long time to be with someone! ask him if he appriciates what you do.. you both need to sit down and talk and compensate...that is the only way to resolve your issues
2006-12-23 16:18:24 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
did you tell him what you just wrote? if so, how did he respond? you gonna have to talk more to him and figure out why all of a sudden, he demands more after 2 years. what does he really want? what kinda improvement is he seeking for? can you manage thoses requests? if yes, tell him and make adjustment. if not, both of you have to compromise. good luck!
2006-12-23 16:10:05 · answer #6 · answered by xyz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Relationships are about giving without expecting anything in return...his efforts seem to be conditional...it is not a competition...if it is tell him he has won...
2006-12-23 16:10:17 · answer #7 · answered by Therapist King 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Maybe it would be best for you if you had a boyfriend who wasn't so preoccupied with taking your inventory, & was more prone to thinking how lucky he is to be able to share his time with you.
Have a Merry Christmas.
2006-12-23 16:11:16 · answer #8 · answered by No More 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
drop him. he sounds like he doesnt appreciate you, and its important to appreciate the person who you're intimate with. you cant drive? does that mean your not 16 yet? have you slept w/ this guy yet? wutever either way, it seems hes not worth it.
2006-12-23 16:15:18 · answer #9 · answered by jezabella 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you know something? get out of that relationship now what more do he want you to do ? you're doing all you can I say the hell with him and no you're not a bad gf. he is a bad bf. get out.
2006-12-23 16:12:49 · answer #10 · answered by bigmomma3526 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋