Do all teenagers feel like me and will I feel better when I'm not a teenager anymore?

Question

I feel like I'm akward all the time and I have trouble talking to people. One time I saw this girl I knew and I didn't expect to see her and we talked and when she left my mom said she could sence the akwardness in my conversation. One time someone was looking at me and I got scared and I didn't know what to do so I said "Hi" and my voice cracked. Everyone hates me and if I'm ever in arguments or whatever everyone sides against me always, even one of my best friends. My parrents said people are intimidated by me bacause I'm too secluded. I think it must be at least in part because I'm ugly, I have been told I'm beautifull but if I was people wouldn't hate me like they do. Once I was about to read saomething I wrote in front the class and I was shaking so bad that my writing was hardly readable. I hardly ever get flirted with on an the extremely rare occasion that I do my akwardness repells them. One time I was about to read something in front of the class (different class) and I

was kinda nervous and this girls talking to me like I’m a retard “It not gunna hurt you” – or something like that. Everybody thinks I’m stupid. My friends think I’m stupid, my teachers think I’m stupid, my non-friends think I’m stupid, people I don’t even know think I’m stupid. I’m scared of almost everybody, they all scary gangstas and sex perverts and emo kids at my school and I’m scared of high school kids that have sex. One time this special kid is talking to me and I couldn’t understand her slurred speech and I just thought I could agree with, confirm, or acknowledge whatever she had said with “yeah” but then she got mad and I still feel bad about it and I think she hates me because she drew this picture of everybody at my table in art class except me.

I must be emitting some bad vibes that make people hate me. One time someone I almost never speak to and didn’t even know my name just randomly asks me if I believe in God and I told her I do but could people be hating me because they think I believe in God. I wouldn’t give up God to please people for any means but does that make people hate you? Why does everyone hate me and why am I so awkward?

Answer 1

The teenage years are just awkward years. I sometimes have those feelings too, and it's just a phase almost every teen goes through. It'll pass eventually. Just be yourself around everyone, and don't be afraid of what others think of you.

Good luck!

Answer 2

First of all, I want you to close your eyes and take a deep breath, thinking of everything that makes you happy. Everyone goes through what you're going through. It hit me mostly when i started college, which resulted in severe depression. Here's what I did, and it's helped a lot. First, you must acknowledge that everyone is not out to get you, and you'd be surprised at how many people actually care about you and don't hate you and don't think you're weird. Smile more. A simple smile can go a long way when you are with new people, it shows that you're open and willing to talk. When you are talking to new people (especially people you are attracted to) do your best not to talk fast, don't talk about really really off topic things, make eye contact most of the time, smile, and just be yourself. Don't let your self-consciousness take over no matter what the situation is. Look in the mirror every day and smile, and say out loud 'I am beautiful, god loves me, and I am worthy of anything I want'. This will help you gain self confidence. Above all, you must believe in yourself and trust that god loves you and will take care of you no matter what, and that it doesn't matter what other people say about you or to you, what matters is that you have self worth and what you think of yourself is how others will percieve you. Oh, and no matter how nervous you are, try new things. This will also help you gain self confidence and show people that you are not boring. Also, if your current friends treat you like crap, you need new friends for sure. Having crappy friends is a total downer because they make you feel like it's your fault for their poor treatment of you when it's actually them trying to make themselves feel better by treating you badly since they have their own personal problems and feel the need to behave in this way. Remember, everyone feels the way you feel at some point in their lives, and life goes on, it will get much better, teenager or not. I hope this answer helps you at least a little. ^_^

Answer 3

Listen honey, you're not alone in this. Almost everyone goes through something similar in their teens. You're no more a kid, but you're also not yet an adult, and you're struggling to find who you are. I was hopelessly awkward in high school, but I kinda 'blossomed' in college...was popular...had many friends etc.

I think its fantastic that you're mature enough to at least have some idea of who you are: you're smart enough to stay away from the gangsters & the sex pervs, smart enough to know not to get involved in this nonsense at this stage in your life, and most importantly, you believe in God. Do not give up that belief, no matter what. Its the only thing that saves us.

Its not your looks or anything superficial, but your confidence that draws ppl to you. Right now, you lack in it, which is why you can't maintain a conversation. The first step to overcoming this is to be comfortable with who you are. I know its cliched to say that if you don't like yourself, no one else will. But hey, its true. Also, not everyone you meet will want to be your friend, or even like you. That's a harsh fact of life that applies to everyone. So forget about winning everyone over.

Right now you have two choices: either stay the way you are, & fret on the inside. Or consciously decide to change. Nothing's gonna happen overnight. In fact, you may just find ppl getting worse. But hang in there...take each day, each moment, each conversation as it comes. Remember, we're all just ppl. Plus, life's too short to waste it being awkward & shy. I think of it this way: right now I'm xyz years old....what have I done with my self till now? I've finished my education /working /learnt abc talents / travelled to these places etc. And what do I want to do ahead?

When you turn 18 and 20 or 30, what would you like to look back and see? A lifetime spent in being awkward, or at least the attempt to change? Forget about what's already happened. But take charge of what can happen.

All the best & Merry Christmas!

Answer 4

I do hope that you get to a point where you don't feel this way. Try thinking more positive. Do you know that your whole day can be affected just by your very first thoughts of the day? I'm talking about thoughts you have even before you get out of bed everyday. Maybe you could learn how to make something, or take music lessons, or art lessons, or karate lessons, singing lessons. Hang around positive people. These people that are calling you stupid are not your friends. Praying always works too. God never leaves us. I'm sure you're beautiful inside and out. Take care. Merry Christmas.

Answer 5

So sorry, but the answer is yes. Those that look like they're cool are just better at hiding it than you are. It will be ok and it will get better. I promise.
The only reason those other girls get flirted is because of those 'vibes' you talked about. They're putting off different ones than you are. I'm sure you are NOT ugly. I can tell you that you are are at the very least humble and care about others. Am I right? Bet I am. Give it time and find ways to work on your self image. You are a good and worthy person.

Answer 6

It's common. Go somewhere no one know you and make a complete fool of yourself. Not getting in trouble or anything, but be bold, laugh a little too loud, flirt with a cute guy. If you make a fool of yourself, oh well, you'll never see these people again anyway. Repeat until you feel more comfortable. Also get involved. Doing something you are good at and enjoy builds self-confidence.

When i was in high school I never danced at dances. I was afraid of looking like a fool. Then I had a good friend from another school and started going to dances with her and dancing because I had nothing to fear - now I love it, and i've even been told I'm good at it.

Answer 7

Hello, I know exactly how you feel. It's very hard to be shy when the world wants you to be outgoing. Just remember there are other teenagers just like you. Start looking around at people and watching their behaviors. You'll notice everyone has their own unique insecurities. No one is perfect. And unfortunately everyone won't like you. But chin up, it DOES get better. And as far as getting hit on, I'm sure there are guys who think you are beautiful, but may not want to hit on you cause they don't know you very well. My advice which I used when I was a teenager just like you. When I was in my room I would talk or read outloud. I would get used to my own voice. Then in the mirror. Practice saying small talk until you are comfortable saying it out loud. That way there isn't as much awkwardness when you are saying hello to someone. Then the intimadation will go away & more people will get comfortable with you. Your shyness won't go away, but it helps to be comfortable & confident with yourself. It shows to other people, but it does take practice. :) Good luck! (PS Once you graduate from high school, the world opens up and you'll find out millions of people are just like you. :))

Answer 8

Many teens go through what you are going through...and yes, you will grow out of it. Here's a shocker for you...when you graduate, these people become nothing to you...you will probably not see most of them ever again, so what do you care what they think?? No one can tell you who you are, only you can do that. You are a unique, one of a kind person...and be proud of that! Focus on making yourself to be the best you that there is and that, my friend, is what will make a difference. Love who you are and if you don't love who you are, then change what you don't love and embrace that embraceble you!! By the time you're in your 20's this whole period in your life will be a blur. Hang in there hon...life absolutely gets better!

Answer 9

I'm sure all teenagers do not feel like you, but I'm sure there are some that do. Being a teen is an awkward thing period. There is so much emphasis on "fitting in" and society tells us what we should like and dislike and when people do not fit what others think then we as humans feel that we are inferior. The only thing I can say is if you can get ahold of one thing---get ahold of this. This helped me when I was somewhat in a situtation like yours. The God of this Universe, the one who created ALL things, the one who died for our sins, the one who holds ALL things together loves you the way you are!!! What others think does not matter, all that matters is that you are PLEASING to God! Look to Him for ALL things and He will lead you to the people He knows should be in your life. And honestly, you have every right to be afraid of people, this world is evil, sick and perverted. It's not always a bad thing, but you must know there are beautiful, loving people out there too. Remember, JESUS LOVES YOU!

Answer 10

I was really nervous and such when I was your age. I hated getting up in front of the class and I always felt like I was being criticized. I still feel that way sometimes esp. at work. I feel like Im kinda dumb but I know Im not. You probably prefer to work on your own and you probably feel pretty confident about stuff you do on your own. Thats how I am anyway. Keep trying to do things that boost your ego. Keep trying to talk, practice does make perfect afterall. Dont give up, you will feel better and you will find a place where you feel at ease.

Answer 11

i was teh same way when i was younger. then i went on an exchange during summer and made all new friends who didnt have preconceived notions of me. I realized that i was likeable and there was noting repellant about me.

My biggest problem was that i had no self confidence. I think other people pick up on that (esp teens who are also insecure) once *I* thought i was worth time and resprct others started seeing it too.

DO WHAT YOU HAVE TO IN ORDER TO GET THAT WETHER IT IS A CHANGE OF SCENERY OR FINDING THAT THING YOU ARE REALLY GOOD AT

when YOU think you are a great person others naturally believe you