Is it wrong to leave a small wedding reception when you are rude and angry and don't know why?

Question

Today at the last minute my daughter and boyfriend got married today. At first I was excepting it. Next when I notice his family
were doing a lot of things like preparing the meals. Let me state I'm the mother of the bride. All I provided was what was old and what was used. I acturally I felt left out of the events of what was going on. To realize what I'm typing here I was in the background and my sons wedding also. Anyway I found myself getting angry so I left the event. When I should have been happy but I was not and just don't know why I was angry.

Answer 1

I think you did everyone a favor by leaving. Who wants and angry and rude person at a wedding reception? If the wedding was really last minute, what were you to do? It would have been better if you could have contained your anger and put on a happy face, but its too late now. Try to explain your feelings to your daughter. Your departure may not have improved her day!

Answer 2

Of course you know why you were angry. You felt left out...you said it yourself. I think it was wrong of you to leave...you should have just gone for a walk and cooled off. I don't totally understand your story...You said that today, at the last minute, your daughter go married. How last minute? Did you offer to help? Being in the background of both weddings tells me that your children, for some reason, don't think you are interested. You should have approached your children and the parents of their intended to find out how you could help. You were rude and I feel you are angry with yourself. Too late now but maybe you can make it up to them somehow in the near future. Talk to them...don't let this go on.

Answer 3

You know your behavior was not as it should have been, which is why you posted. Did you have a different picture of what this day would be like when you thought of your daughter's wedding? You were probably just disappointed the event was thrown together and you did not get to help or bond with your daughter during the process. It is understandable. It is important to remember this fact going forward...we are with our parents growing up because we have to be. We are friends with our parents as adults because we choose to be. Many people move far away from their parents to start their own lives, families and traditions. If your desire is to be a part of your children's lives, make sure you are a desirable friend and not just their mother.

Answer 4

yikes. well, first figure out why you were mad- and it seems like you already know- deep down. Second, apoligize to your new ly wed daughter & son. It was THEIR special day, and you took away their thunder. Its not about WHO gets to plan WHAT. The wedding might have been put on last minute because the groom and bride knew it would be more difficult dealing with all you complusive and over-bearing parents. They were onto something, obviously. I'd take a good look at WHY you were left out. Because, that is probably the key problem anyway. Oh, and- no, there's never any excuse (except health-related) for LEAVING your child's wedding reception. (no matter how big or small it was). She only has ONE real mom. And you missed out on a big protion of HER big day. I don't know what your relationship with your daughter is, but my mom and I go through spirts of anger, and joy. Like yesterday, we were in a huge -emotional arguement. (I'm visiting for Xmas) ...But today, we were singing oldies but goodies in a parked car! :) if you understand your daughter, and she understands you.... thats whats important. Does she know you "wouldn't miss her big day for the world!"...? or is it more like, "Let me check my day keeper."

best of luck. --to the bride and groom.

Answer 5

So, unlike most Mother's of the Bride - who get treated like slaves and work through-out their daughter's wedding - you got treated like a guest and were allowed to relax and enjoy the event......

Seriously - you let your selfishness leave a negative mark a once in a life time event and you owe your daughter a huge apology. The day was about her and her new marriage - not about you.

Answer 6

You seem like a very selfish mother in law with a temper tantrum. You did the right thing by leaving the wedding reception. They don't need your childish behavior...but, if you want to be a part of things, you need to let them know that verbally or try to help out in many small ways as possible, rather than getting angry of not being in the spotlight. Only the bride and groom are in the spotlight, not you.

Answer 7

The proper thing to do was to show respect and class putting aside your own feelings of importance so that the new bride and groom could enjoy their day. I understand you feel left out, but this shouldn't have been about you....it wasn't your wedding day. You could've gone to the new in laws and asked "What can I do to help?" and involved yourself instead of leaving and probably hurting your daughter and new SIL.

Answer 8

You should've just stayed there. Although you was unhappy, it's your daughter's wedding, you should've been happy or acted like you was happy. You should've just talked with your in law's about why you was unhappy. I think they did you a favor because they prepared the meals, did you wanted to prepare the meals and go through all those trouble??

If the in law's asked you why you left, just tell them that you was feeling sick and that's why you left.

Answer 9

I think you should have stayed at your own daughter's wedding. Perhaps talking things out with your son-in-law's family so they know your point of view. They might not even have thought they were doing anything wrong! Also, pull your daughter aside and let her know your feelings so she could include you in the events. :)

Answer 10

I think it was better that way. That way nobody can get mad at you for being rude. Just make sure you explain and apologize to your daughter and your son-in-law and his family.