It’s not a terrible drinking problem, but it’s getting worse ever since she quit her job. She gets cranky so easily and has all of these mood swings. She hides bottles all around the house and it’s rather depressing to open the panty and find 3 almost empty vodka bottles lying behind the newspaper bin. Last week I was baking cookies that required rum and surprisingly we had it in the house. (Who drinks RUM?) The bottle hadn’t been opened yet and I simply used two tablespoons. Two days later I found the rum bottle. It was completely empty. I’m getting really worried. She’s such a nice person but her drinking is ruining our relationship.
How on earth can I talk to her about this or get her to even admit to it? She gets angry so easily and won’t see anything anyone else’s way when she is.
2006-12-23 14:08:26 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
get her out of the house
don't keep her cooped up inside
that way she'll learn to depend on alcohol
bring her out to see the sun
bring her shopping or something
try bringing her out to dinner to a restaurant that doesn't serve alcohol
try everything you can to make her lay off the alcohol for a while
2006-12-23 14:14:21 · answer #1 · answered by silverwater92 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some say using intervention can help. I'm not so sure. I believe the person has to admit they have a problem before they can begin to get or accept help. In the mean time you and any one else that lives with the alcoholic need to attend the AA meetings for family of alcoholics. Its amazing how much they can help. You can talk to other people about similar problems and really learn alot about the alcoholic person you live with. My dad was an alcoholic all my growing up years. I'm so glad my mother took us kids to these meetings. Just try a couple of them. I wish you well. m
2006-12-23 22:21:40 · answer #2 · answered by Mache 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There isn't a lot you can do for your mom and I know how painful that is (because my father is an alcoholic).
You can tell her that your concerned about her drinking and tell her how you feel. Of course you'll have to take anything that she throws at you once you do this. It may be denial, it may be anger... but you have said your peace and your letting her know that you know she is having problems. This puts the responsibility to change things on her. Then, you'll have the time and energy to hook up with a 12 step program or other support group to concentrate on how it's effecting you.
If she is in denial, it doesn't mean you have to be. Even if she isn't receptive to you bringing up the problem, it may plant a seed that she can use to get beyond where she is now.
Good luck and remember to take care of yourself.
2006-12-24 04:05:11 · answer #3 · answered by scorpio1913 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds serious to me. You didn't say how old you are. If still in HS or before talk to a teacher or councilor about it. There is very little that can be done if she isn't willing to admit the problem but YOU can get help. It probably won't be pleasant no matter what but the worst thing is to just let her keep drinking and not at least try to help her If you do nothing she will probably never recover.
2006-12-23 22:18:23 · answer #4 · answered by Michael da Man 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all I want to tell you that I am a 44 woman, son, so my answer is not a joke. I have to say your mother has a problem with alcohol, but I think she doesn't noticed it yet, or maybe she doesn't want to accept it. The first help here is to try she accepts that she has a problem. You can help her contacting with an AA group. They can help her if she wants to be helped, but anyway, they can help you because in their groups there are people related with persons who drink. Check it out in AA son, because I think you are more worry than your words say. I wish you the best for you and your mom.
2006-12-23 22:27:56 · answer #5 · answered by Adriana M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetheart, I hate to tell you this, but only your Mother can make the determination that she has a drinking problem. You can tell her over and over and it doesn't mean a thing. Until she hits bottom and each of us has our own bottom to hit, she will never admit that she has a problem. By telling her this will make her angry at you and cause her to drink more because that is what she is looking for is another excuse to drink. I would certainly tell her how I felt, but do it when she is sober and not hung over, it that is possible. Threats will not do any good either. She has to make her own decisions in her own time. I grew up in a home with a Dad that was an abusive alcoholic, and both of my older brothers are alcoholics. One of them is recovered and has been clean and sober for 21 years, so it is possible. Our Dad died at the age of 52 from cancer of the throat and lungs or the drinking would have continued until it killed him. I strongly suggest to you to go to Al-a-non Meetings, it will be a big help to you. You need to take care of you and then pray that God will help your Mother see what she is doing to herself and her family. Until then please, please take care of yourself. God Bless and Happy Holidays!!
2006-12-23 22:20:53 · answer #6 · answered by Cindy Roo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Believe me I know, I have the same problem with a member of my family. You cannot do a thing while the person continues to deny the problem.She has to eventually recognize the issue on the basis it is destroying herself and her family. Perhaps try an Intervention by a local AA group.
2006-12-23 22:14:47 · answer #7 · answered by Ted 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here is a website that you should look at:
http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/
There are support groups for children of alcoholics. They will give you support and suggestions on how to handle the terrible situation you have described. Perhaps you will need to organize an intervention, where friends and family members confront your mother and encourage her to get help for her problem. You should definitely contact a support group to help you, even though you might not be able to help her.
2006-12-23 22:15:01 · answer #8 · answered by Anniesgran 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
She's not going to admit it because she doesn't think she has a problem . There is NOTHING that you can do to make her see that she has one if she doesn't WANT to see it. I suggest YOU go to Al Anon and learn how to cope with it
2006-12-23 22:36:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
my mom was a pill addict ,my dad a drunk ,my mother in law a crackhead, me haha i dont even smoke cigarettes! its all about choices and you cant change a person no matter how bad you want too. try to help, but if they dont want it theirs no sense in trying
2006-12-23 22:14:57 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋