Do you have a "here's your sign" story?

Question

This is for Bill Engall fans...
Like the best answers for stupid questions, and I mean stupid
eg: You take your pooch out and some one sais "you walking that dog"

Answer 1

A few years ago we were moving. The movers had backed the truck up into the drive way and a neighnor girl came over hollering "Are ya'll moving today?' If she wasn't 12 I would have responded "No we are just trying to see how big of a truck we need for when we do move, we are gonna unload it as soon as it gets loaded.

Merry Christmas

Answer 2

1 " i was packing up my house to move and we have all the boxes outside by the truck and my next door neighbor comes out and says "you all moving?" and i said "nope we just pack up everything once in awhile to see how many boxes it takes" here's your sign."


2 there is a diesel stuck under an underpass and i got out of my car and waited with the driver till the cop got there. The cop finally arrives and asks a stupid stupid question"you get your truck stuck" and without missing a beat the driver of the diesel says"nope i was delivering that over pass and i ran out of gas."



there u go i like those to i am a huge fan of bill's especially dork fish but that's a different story hope u get a laugh out of those two.

Answer 3

I went to the movies when the "here's your sign" song first came out, there were no cup holders in the theater and when I went to use the restroom I left my drink on the floor tucked under my seat, it was early and not many people had shown up for the movie yet.
When I got back there was a woman sitting in my seat, so I asked "was there a drink on the floor here when you sat down?"
"yes, I was afraid it would get knocked over so I threw it out, why, was it yours?"
"Oh no, ma'am, I just like to go around asking people if there were drinks on the floor when they sat down, here's your sign."
She got very mad and turned to her husband and told him what I said, and rather than saying anything to me (she was hoping he would do something to me) he started laughing and told her that she should have left it there. Later he snuck over to where I had moved, no wanting to stay sitting next to her, and gave me money to replace the drink. He said "I told her to leave it and it's worth it to have something where she was so wrong."

Answer 4

Yes--my son in Iraq e-mailed that he was taking swimming lessons. When I told my husband, he said "There's a POOL there?"
naw, it's SAND swimming--here's yer sign!

And once I was in the BASEMENT of a department store waiting at the elevator. When the doors opened, the lady next to me said "Going up?" Heck no---we thought we'd go SIDEWAYS today! Here's YOUR sign!

Answer 5

Yes, I do... I was in a nationally known fabric shop looking for cloth for my cross stitch... I found it took it up to the lady to have it cut. I told her I wanted 18 inches of the cloth.... to that she said, "we only sell it by the yard." So I told her to give me half a yard and she measured off 1/2 a yard (18 inches) and gave it to me.

This is a true story.

Answer 6

will i must say i had my "Here's your sign moment once"
i went to the gas station and put 6.00 worth of gas in my car so i could get the change back to get a pop at work,
well i handed the dude a 10 dollar bill and ask for the change back in "ones" and he was like "as oppose to what dimes??"
i felt like a putz not even thinking i bet he thought i was a dumb blonde hehehehehe



another one is one day at work i was using the electronic stapler to staple a bunch of papers together and it was one of those super big ones and it ran out of staples, so i asked if anyone knew how to replace them and the lady said to go use the one up at the front desk while she put staples in it, so i did and was stapling away when i looked down and it was not stapled, i ask the chick next to me wtf its just not my day and she just about pissed herself because i was apparently using the DATE STAMPER
what a dumb ***

Answer 7

I went to Arby's with my daughter and mom. This is the conversation I had with the girl who took our order:
Her:How old is she 1 or 2?
Me: She'll be 4 in February.
Her: Oh what day?
Me: The 14th.
Her: Oh that's like Valentines day isn't it?
Me: Uh huh.
Her: My son was born Dec. 29. If only he was born 3 days earlier.
Me: (dumbfounded) Uh..................yeah....................

Answer 8

I had a woman tell me she couldn't get pregnant. I asked her why and she says "It's hereditary"

It didn't stop there... I decided to elaborate "You mean your mother has it too?" To which she says "yes"

Answer 9

when its 105 degrees and someone ask "is it hot enough for you?" like what, you want it to be 115 ?

Answer 10

yes...?