My father abandoned me when i was 14 months old?

Question

I am 19 now, but seem to go for older men, i mean older!! My latest was 40. he treated me badly, and my mum went mad! She told him to keep away from me, in a pub, as he was all over me. She lost it, had a row with him, she is his age, and she went mad when she saw us together. I must admit, i was drunk, and he was all over me, so she was angry! He told her to f...k off, so she walked out, upset. He hit me last night, now i have told my mum, she is annoyed with me, said i should listen to her more, she is so angry! What is wrong with me? My mum worries, says i am looking for a father figure, she gets so upset, said she will punch him for this, what is wrong with me?

Answer 1

You are looking for a father figure. I could not imagine that I would have been able to walk away from any of my 3 kids at such a young age and your father is, in my opinion, not worthy of the title. Just be very careful that you dont choose to live with a man so much older than you as he will have different values and outlooks to you. I know that this will difficult for you to accept, but you must find someone younger who will care for you and you must stay away from older men. I am 60 and agree with your mum. Also try to drink less, so you can always be in control of the situation. Get rid of the bloke who hit you, he will do it again!!

Answer 2

i am sorry for your situation but you can change it. You are young and older men may want to be with you so they can control you. guys your age are the same way also too. your mom is right though it sounds like you are looking for a father figure since there was none when you were growing up. but you need to be careful. there is someone out there for you. and there age will not matter. just be patient. take your time you are still young. and no man no matter how old they are should put there hands on a female!! get away from that man. keep in mind to your mom is older and if she has a problem with it there maybe a reason. there is really nothing wrong with you just keep your head up and pray and you will find love when you least expect it

Answer 3

Nothing wrong with having a bf or gf twice your age. Although he does need to be beaten for hitting you. No guy should hit a woman for any reason.

I have 4 daughters I'm actually their step father they are not my own children but consider them mine. the youngest being your age. All are into older men, having had a gut full of the younger immature men available in the world today.

I was a bit concerned about this trend with my daughters. So recently when we were all home together wrapping christmas presents for their mother while their mother was away on a business trip I came right out and asked them why they prefer older men.

Here are some of their answers.

1. They like the maturity and experience of an older man.
2. One said she liked the sex, it was much more fullfilling and lasted longer than the younger guys, the other's giggled and agreed and 2 said Oh Yeah it's wonderful.
3. They all agreed that older men are more level headed and financially capable of caring for their every need.
4. Another thing they mentioned is that Older men seemed to appreciate them more and treated them much better than younger men.
5. All said they didn't like younger men because they acted like children and were jealous and more controlling than older men.
6. older men dress better look more distingquished than younger men.
7. Older men were more dependable and appreciated the fact that a younger woman would be involved with them.
8. Older men have more self-confidence and don't put on an act. Cause they know who they are.
9. All of them agreed that it was great to have a man who was experienced at so many things could fix just about anything that was broken, and that they had great looking cars and pickup trucks.
10. All were grateful to have an older man in their lives aside from me that could lend advice. It was like having 2 dads.

You should warn the guys you become involved with that if they ever hit you, that it is over and done with immediately. No 2nd chances at all.

Lot's of older men would be down right honored to have a lady your age involved in their lives. Shop around some and stay away from the married men and the drunks.

None of them felt it was because they were lacking a father in their lives for many years.

Listen to your mother out of respect. She's probably going on her personal experience in her life and doesn't want you to be hurt.

Answer 4

Take a huge step back from this and have a long cold stare at your recent history.
There is more than one type of love (e.g. sexual, filial, fraternal, paternal, friendship, charity etc). Are your love-attractions confused when you go for these guys? We all need all of them, but not from the same person/people.
I am almost 40. If a 19 year old came near me I'd chase her and apart from dirty buggers, I don't know any respectable guy who wouldn't. 19 is a bit too close to schoolkid for my liking. Compare 21 to 19, and 19 to 17. They're worlds apart.
If a boyfriend is what you need find a BOYfriend, not a wrinklefriend. If you do need an older male figure to fill a gap in your life, find somebody who doesn't try it on and who is preferably past it. Better still, befriend a 60-something guy AND his wife.
Best of luck.
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Wisdom tooth, you are a prize A-hole. I would wish bad luck on you, but someone as insensitive and smug as you are, is bound to be capable of drawing enough shi t on your own head. Maybe the writing will keep you sufficiently distracted from your own, sad, selfish real life

Answer 5

It seems to me your mother is right. You are trying to compensate for the father you never had. As much as we old guys would love to have a younger woman in our lives, unless they treat you with respect, you're wasting your time with them. Try for someone your own age babe, you'll be better off for it. Younger guys will be able to match your energy levels, and will enjoy the same music. Hitting you is not acceptable, regardless of age. Any man who hits a woman is not worth being with, no matter how nice he may be.

There is nothing wrong with you babe, many women before you have done the same thing, life has dealt you a bad hand, don't try to compensate for not having a father, just go out and have fun with people your own age, live your own life and forget us old guys.

Answer 6

WT R U DOIN
R U CRAZY
wy r u goin with those idiots
u can find someone on ur age who understands u and loves u.
ull never find love with 40 yrs old fu cker. they just wnna enjoy ur young body. dont let them do that too u.
and about u r father, u should get used to it. many ppl live without fathers, its a normal thing.
STOP goin out with those ppl.
do u go to school, ull find some who likes u, and he'll give u all the love u need. REALL LOVE

Answer 7

have a think

it might not help for us to preach

nothing will be better for you than if you decide how your future should be. there are umpteen 40 year olds out there that would love you and treat you like you wouldn't believe. so age isn't so much the problem.

if you decide that it's how you pick guys that you need to change or when to pick guys ('cos doing it when you're half way through a table worth of tequilas isn't going to help your analytical thinking much.)

all the best, love!

Answer 8

I have to agree with your mom--You probably are looking for that "father" figure. As for this guy hitting you-------No man should ever hit a woman------------dont get me wrong there are some women that probably deserve to be hit, but a REAL MAN will NEVER hit ANY woman no matter how provoked he gets. Get away from this guy NOW.

Answer 9

The best part of Yahoo answers is I get enough material for short story themes from people like you. When they are published, I shall send you an autographed copy.
Meanwhile, keep posting.

Answer 10

try to go for younger guys, if you were a couple years younger, that'd be rape, nobody over 25 for you!