I'm still in shock as to what my ex did....?

Question

I haven't seen my ex -bf in a year so it was surprising when he said he wanted to see me and "meet up". He called me, and planned the whole thing (a movie). I assumed there would be coffee afterwards since after one year I thought he wanted to really talk & catch up. He picked up, but he never opened any doors for me, he walked ahead of me, & after the movie he just drove me home. He never walked me to my door & just said "merry Christmas". He never tried to even hug me so I just shook his hand & said bye. I felt like trash after the date, he treated me bad, like s**t. He would open doors & walk me to my door when we were going out, but I thought he would be a gentlemen again cuz of all the effort he put in to set up this date, by calling & picking me up. I thought after the movie, we would have coffee and that he would say either 1) I want u back, or 2) I wanna be friends. I thought #2 is what he would say. Neither of this happened. WHY did he do that & treat me like that?

On the way home, I finally asked him why did he wanna meet up w/ me after all this time & he said 'u know just to hang out, I wanna see u every once in awhile'. He really meant, I wanna see u every year, on my terms & I'll treat u like this. I went home & decided that I don't even wanna see him once a yr & that i had to tell him this & how he treated me bad. So I went on msn aftre the date and I told him exactly how he made me feel. I said "You know, I honestly did wanna see u, & I did kinda miss u, & even though u'r a nice guy, after the way u treate dme today, the way u rushed it, & the way u said bye in the car, we don't even need to see each other once a year, we should pretend like today was our final goodbye." He was shocked & kept saying sorry. I finally just dai bye & logged out. Am I right or did I overreact?

Answer 1

Have you ever heard of "Focking with her head".
He's messing with you. Thought he could see how he feels after a year, and give you a chance to throw yourself at him.
By your description, he felt little or nothing, and you didn't throw away your dignity, so he dropped you at the curb.
He sounds like a loser.
Lose his #, ASAMFP

Answer 2

Can't say for sure without knowing all of the conversation that led up to the "date", but my guess...? He was lonely at Xmas and wanted a friend to go see a movie with. I think perhaps you were hoping for him to want you back, and that was way more than he wanted. I didn't hear anything in there where he expressly treated you like crap (such as being abusive or ignoring you completely), but perhaps your expectations not being met made you feel that way. I hate to say it, but you're probably overreacting, just blow it off.

Answer 3

Without knowing why you both broke up in the first place it's hard to tell why he did what he did. Maybe he was nervous and wanted to say something to you but couldn't find the words..By the way you described the date with him, it didn't sound to me like he was treating you like a s**t. It almost sounds like he was preoccupied in his thoughts. Give him some time and see if he contacts you again before you judge him for his actions.

Answer 4

He did not treat you as a slut, he did not have sex with you and then get dressed and leave. However, he did not act as a gentlemen. Perhaps he wanted to see you to see if he still had feelings for you, or how you were going to react. And he got his answer. I would not dwell on it. Move on with your life and find someone else. However, if it is really bothering you, call him and ask him what it was all about, what was the purpose of the date. Just be prepared for the answer. God bless****

Answer 5

maybe he realized why he was apart from you in the first place and just wanted some reassurance or something like that! that or he was bored hoping he might get something out of it, but he wasn't gonna put it on himself he was gonna wait for you so that way when you asked about it he could say, well i did it because you wanted too.. i dont' know! good luck and best wishes! hope you have a merry christmas and a very happy new year!

Answer 6

I have no idea why someone would do that to another person. That is really mean and the only way it would make sense is if you broke up with him and that hurt him and so he wanted to hurt you too.

Or maybe he wanted someone else at that movie to see him with someone else hoping they'd get jealous and he is self centered enough to use you like this and never consider how that would make you feel.

Just be glad he's out of your life. Pity the girl that ends up with this jerk.

Answer 7

Maybe he really misses you, but not romantically.... maybe he wants to be friends but not your boyfriend. Or, maybe he's testing you or playing some kind of stupid dating game.
If he calls and invites you out again, invite some of your friends to come along. See if this makes him feel more comfortable, or if he resents not having the time alone with you. Either way it might just spark some conversation between you.
Good Luck!

Answer 8

I think you just answered your own question, love. You finally realised what your true feelings for him are. Good on you for having the guts to tell him, even if you did do it on msn. You know what? I find that msn is a really good way to truly express your feelings. You don't have to look him in the face, and you can say things that you probably wouldn't dare say to his face.

Answer 9

wow... that is a very confusing situation! Guys can really be confusing sometimes! I would say you really just need to call him up and ask him what is up, because with that kind of a reaction it is impossible to tell what he is thinking. It makes no sense. Otherwise, sounds like he's not treating you very well, so just forget him!

Answer 10

Sounds like he wanted to go out and see what you were like now and once he saw, he didn't want to have anything to do with you but didn't know how to end the date in the middle of it. Move on to someone new.