ok im 19 and my boyfriend thinks we should go a little farther. Should we?

Question

we have been together for more then 3 years and all we have ever done is kissed. please give a good answer i am really in need!

Answer 1

I'll not sugar coat it and get to the point. Sex entails not only a bond but a lifetime relationship. It is understandable that your boyfriend may be wanting sex, but he is just that, a boyfriend. After the relationship is over you will be just another piece of butt on some guy's list. I would say that you should let time and maturity be the deciding factors here. At 19 you have absolutely nothing to offer him and he doesn't either. Sex was created to confirm a lifetime bond between a man and a woman as well as to procreate. Unmarried people have no business having any type of sex since they are ill prepared to handle the responsibility that comes with it.
Finally I will say that when you reach true adulthood, which happens at about 26, and have completed your education, earn a decent living, and have a WEDDING ring on your finger, you may have all the sex that you want.
Mr. M was young and in lust once, but he did the right thing and has since been an example to others everywhere. Do what is proper and correct at the appropriate time, live life intentionally, and NEVER compromise your moral standing for anyone. Respect is what you will share with the world, then.
Mr. M on "a little farther."

Answer 2

First of all; congratulations. It takes a lot to only have kissed in a committed long term relationship. Second; are u comfortable with going a little further? Think about it long and hard, and if u believe; pray on it. U shouldn't have any regrets if u do go further, because u cant get it back. U can't stop and still have it be ur first time. It's not about what he wants, it's about what u want as well. U guys should really have an honest talk, and respect each other's decisions, no matter what they are. Good luck on whatever u decide to do. And remember, u never forget, or relive ur firsts.

Answer 3

Well Alyssa, if inside it doesn't feel right to you then do not be forced to do anything that you do not want to do just to try and please someone else. Lots of people your age and much younger give themselves up on either the first or second date thinking that this is going to help them keep their male friend or make them look more mature. But reality is that most kids will not meet their life partners until after they have lived a live and had their heart broken many times and broken many in return. If morally you want to be a virgin on your wedding night then do not feel that you need to progress to become active sexually. If your boyfriend just wants you both to become familiar with each others bodies without intercourse and your in agreement then this is pretty normal and if you are ready for this then go for it. However, know where to draw the line and stick to your morals. Your boyfriend does sound like a gentleman if he is only wanting to progress to next level after a three year relationship. Listen to your instincts (boy just reading what I'm typing and does it ever make me feel old, Ha!) as they will not steer you wrong. Best of luck and have a great holiday season.

Answer 4

What you need to say to yourself is ... am i ready for this ?? If not then it`s got to be no, you have done great to hold out so long. If you thing that after 3 years you feel it`s time then you have to set the mood.
Your boyfriend seems like a good man not pesrtering you all this time, do you think that you have a future with him.

I personally would want to know if we were ok in that department after all this time.
But ..... It`s down to you love, If your not ready then your not ready.

Answer 5

Your comfort is what counts. It is not about your age, your length of relationship or his wants or thoughts. You need to decide what not going further means to you and to set in your mind whether you would be going further for his sake or because you think it is the right thing to do.

IF you are a waiting for marriage, then wait. It would be sad to wait this long and then have sex only to split up and at 22 meet the love of your life. Is it a gamble you are willing to endure?

This is totally about you, your self respect, your morals and your attitudes about sex. This decision has nothing to do with his feelings or thinking. You MUST put yourself first here. IF AFTER doing this, you feel it is time to move foreward, well, then you have your answer.

If AFTER self examination you feel that things need to stay status-quo then they should. NEVER let pressure from a man make you do ANYTHING you are unprepared, unwilling or not comfortable with.

You have to live with yourself the rest of your life, he may not no matter how much you love him. I hope this response assists you.

Answer 6

Only you can really answer that question not a bunch of strangers on the net it is what you feel is best to go a little farther with him or not that's your choice.

Answer 7

If you are in need then you should, You probably feel ready now and this is one of the reasons you are asking this question and the simple answer is you should do what you want to do when you feel ready to. Hope that helps

Answer 8

well i dont see nething wrong with it, u guys r old enough to make ur own decisions and u have been together for a while so i would say do it as long as u r comfortable doing it. if u love eachother there is nothing wrong with making love to eachother. just be careful and use protection. good luck and have fun!!

Answer 9

If you are questioning if you should go further then I would say that you are not ready. Only go as far as you feel is right, Anything further and you may have regrets, If your boyfriend can not respect that then he is not respectful of you or your feelings.

Answer 10

Thats up to you of course. Just don't do anything for anyone else that you, yourself, don't feel comfortable doing. Talk it over w/him so he knows how you feel. If you've been together that long, he'll most likely understand. Have fun!!!