Ok. My man's family is hasseling us to make 3 hour drive to visit for Xmas. We would leave the 24th, return the 25th, because of work obligations. The catch is, his sister is BEYOND awful. Insults me any chance she can. She also gives him **** because he hasn't appeared enough for visits to fall all over her new baby. I don't want to do it, but would for him (grudgingly). He sent me here for answers to help make a choice, so please help. Thanks!
2006-12-23 05:52:12 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Thanks, keep bringin' it! we're tallying votes...
2006-12-23 06:17:37 · update #1
This time of year is annoying enough without having to deal with obnoxious relatives. Stay home and enjoy your days off.
2006-12-23 05:59:39 · answer #1 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would not do it, it is a great deal to ask on Christmas Eve and then have to drive back on Christmas Day! That is a great deal of driving, I prefer to be home on the holidays.And especially since the alternative is to drive a long three hours that may produce a snow storm only to be greeted by such a wicked, self-centered individual. There are to many folks on the highway driving drunk during the holiday season. However, this would be a decision the two of you would have to make, can you handle the wrath of her for not visiting. Sounds like she is a bit selfish and not so understanding. But then on the other hand if it is important to my husband, I would go and make the best of it and then find the positives, you wont have to do it again next year, seeing the baby would be a joy, (i love babies) and you wont have to cook. Have a blessed Christmas and a joyous New Year! God bless****
2006-12-23 05:59:23 · answer #2 · answered by ? 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When you say that you would do it grudgingly do you mean that you will go and then pout the entire time? If that were the case, then don't do him any favors. He can't help the way his sister acts towards you or himself. It is one day. for heavens sake go and just smile and ignore the sister. Help him Mom with the food and other things. Take a good book to read when you want to get out of everyones way. And don't hold this over your husbands head. Be the woman he married.
2006-12-23 06:09:11 · answer #3 · answered by sunny 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Thats a tough one. You have to go with your gut. Having said that, there are a few suggestions I would like to make and I hope they assist you.
Remember if your man is going to STAY your man, you will have YEARS of putting up with the sister you despise. It just won't be possible to ignore the rest of the family because of her. Christmas is the worst time of the year to pull a disappearing act. Remember, this is his family. Regardless how chivalrous he is being, he feels an obligation to go.
Remember, if you let her behaviour control your responses, she wins. The rest of the family will miss seeing you because of one person and you would disappoint your man.
I think that if all that is holding you back is her, you need to examine your feelings for him and his family. Please realize that if you let one person hold her entire family and you hostage, it just isn't right. Try to take the high road and be nice despite her rudeness.
If that does not work, bite you lip and ignore her. Walk away when she is insulting. Others in the family will see your efforts. She will be the one who loses.
Family comes first and if you want to stay with this man, please come to understand that you take him, good, bad and ugly sister! Hope this helps. Do try to have a wonderful Xmas regardless of your decision.
2006-12-23 06:03:02 · answer #4 · answered by Lina H 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You both have to come back home to go to work, right? Can you compromise and promise to go when you have more time. This could be a valid delaying point. Later, you could work out a short one-day trip or however you could manage just a little time with them, perhaps in the Spring.
Does he REALLY want to go. Don't spoil your Christmas. Putting yourselves in an unpleasant situation is not fair for anyone concerned. Peace ! ! ! !
2006-12-23 07:01:28 · answer #5 · answered by intrepid 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've gotta remember, Christmas is the season of good will etc. But really a 6 hour round trip for a day of bitching, stay at home and enjoy yourself ;)
ps, my parents are 10 mins up the road and am just going to 'pop' in for a little while tomo to see them . . PAH Humbug
2006-12-23 05:57:36 · answer #6 · answered by Michael F 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I say make the trip in support of your "man". Try not to respond to what his sister has to say. It's Christmas and family should be together and enjoying the presence of each other, not argueing. If something is said that makes you upset just talk to your "man" about it and step out for some fresh air. It's just one night. Well good luck and Hang in there.
2006-12-23 06:00:13 · answer #7 · answered by Jason C 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should go
if you think you could handle the stress of having them over, invite them for a future date they may see how much effort it takes to get packed up and use a whole weekend for a short visit.
2006-12-23 05:58:12 · answer #8 · answered by Aviator1013 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is hard dealing with a difficult family, but remember they are still family and holidays are all about family. You need to suck it up and deal with them. Everyone does it every damn year. When dealing with the difficult sister, just put on a false face and smile. If you rise above it all, you will be proud of yourself.
2006-12-23 05:58:04 · answer #9 · answered by Ikkin 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
tell em you got measles. why shuld yu go an listen to some whiny spoiled little witch? i don't even go to MY family b/c the way the fall all over my sister an her bf who i think is in the closet!!! stay home and ENJOY your holidays!
2006-12-23 05:58:07 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋