Hi I know a friend of mine that I work with, she's 16 and a guy who is 21 wants to go out with her. In the UK this is obiviousley legal but I am wondering since she is very young, if a 21 year went out with her would this automatically be taking advantage of her? Or would it depend on how she is treated? Or what would would you think?
Obviously I dont want to see her hurt but at the same time I dont want to be over protective as well!
Thanks for your thoughts n have a good xmas!
2006-12-23 05:51:56 · 34 answers · asked by wicked_paul 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I know you want to protect her but at the end of the day she is 16 and more than capable of taking care of herself so its up to her to make this decision herself.
If she wants to go out with this guy then let her, just be her friend when she needs you.
Merry Xmas xxx
2006-12-23 06:15:17 · answer #1 · answered by anastacia500 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Putting legalities aside it would be taking advantage of her even if that was not his intention . I feel this way because a 21 year old has already had some opportunity to date around and play the field , sow some wild oats , call it what you may . A 16 year old should have an opportunity to learn and grow and not be reliant on getting her information and life experience from one person only , in this case the 21 year old. She should be free to date around and just enjoy her teenage years and a 21 year old I feel would expect too much of her , which later may lead to regret on her part should they develop a serious relationship now. Basically I am saying she is too young despite her outward maturity and the 21 year old should seriously take this into consideration . Also her parents may not approve but that isn't my point. A 21 year old should mature and learn to deal with the opposite sex in his age group also and he has this choice. You only go around once in life , a 21 year old would be rushing a 16 year old is my point and I advise against it for these reasons. She needs her freedom now in her teenage years to have fun with friends so she doesn't later feel she missed out on anything.
2006-12-23 06:21:38 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
All depends on the situation. In the UK of course it is legal, and the age gap is not large if you go a few years more and say 18 and 23 year old. So, I think it is all dependant on the situation. I'm always skeptical when the age gap is more than 2-3 years when the youngest is 16, but again, be protective that she won't get hurt, but it should be her choice.
2006-12-23 23:33:25 · answer #3 · answered by Bored With This 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is a bigger difference between 16 and 21 than say 26 and 31, know what I mean. Physically the body may be there, psychologically the person may not be. That's why they have the laws. As an older person you have more power. Your own money, car, place to live, etc. In a relationship mentioned between a 21 and 16 year old, there is a vast difference..
2006-12-23 06:01:58 · answer #4 · answered by playgtar 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
well im in a relationship with a 4 year age gap and we are getting married next year so it does go to prove that age gaps arent a real biggie.if your friend is mature as you say she is then she will know whats right for her at the end of the day we all make mistakes so i think that she should go for it see how it goes and enjoy her life.if he takes advantage of your friend then your friend should at least be able to say no to the things that arent or dnt seem right.you obviously sound like a good friend to her so stick by her no matter what and she will be just fine
merry xmas xxx
2006-12-23 06:04:27 · answer #5 · answered by joanne l 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Whats the difference when 1 was 16 i was seeing a 24 year old woman.
2006-12-23 06:56:51 · answer #6 · answered by harry 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's too big of a gap. They are really at different stages in life.. She should still be in high school and he should have been out on his own in college or working for a while. He's ready for sex and maybe already had quite a bit. She probably doesn't have a lot of experience with that. Why is he interested in a girl who's so much younger instead of someone closer to his age? I strongly suspect there is something amiss with him and his social skills. He might be a nice guy, but I'd say it's a bad idea for her to date him.
2006-12-23 05:59:21 · answer #7 · answered by L T 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's not the 5 year age gap that is a cause for concern it is the fact that she is 16 to his 21. Tell him to so out with girls a couple of years older - if he is anything like anice guy he would ask her parents first anyway at that age.
2006-12-24 02:54:15 · answer #8 · answered by D B 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no straight answer to this at all, it depends entirely on the two people concerned.
Personally, I don't think there is anything very wrong with it. when I was 17 I went out with a 23 year old guy and he was very sweet.
There can be alot of assumptions that guys are only after one thing when the majority are not.
you should give her the benefit of the doubt and trust her judgement on the guy.
She is lucky to have a friend like you who is looking out for her though, good for you!
2006-12-23 06:06:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Depends on how she is treated and what he has on his mind,be up front and straight forward with your male friend and ask him why he wants to go out with a 16 year old,if he him haws around about his answer,tell your 16 year old female friend to be ware of this guy.
2006-12-23 05:57:40 · answer #10 · answered by davec4real_02 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋