How do I counsel a soldier who is getting married?

Question

If I'm a team leader and one of my soldiers is getting married, what exactly do I need to do as far as counseling goes?

Answer 1

I'd make sure he was set with what to do with his paperwork. He needs to change his SGLI after the marriage. I have seen to many "wrong" family members because the service member didn't update his information.

He needs to enroll his spouse and any stepkids into DEERS, get ID cards, and also Tricare.

If your command has an ombudsman, that person can be helpful in letting the new spouse know what's up.

Answer 2

I am a civilian and so is my husband and we are married 13 years. To counsel someone about marriage is a beautiful thing many couples do not want to hear or heed advice.

I would encourage you to tell this person that marriage is work and hard work and it is not a fairytale and a marriage covenant needs to be entered with prudence and care not sole for the romance and honeymoon purposes.

Being that this person is a soldier the spouse needs to be aware of the dangers and risks at hand. If this soldier is very young lets not rush. How you feel in new found love is not always your sentiment 10 years later.

IF this soldier is a christian and if you are permitted to talk about God tell this couple to pray everyday together and have Bible reading and to communicate and be honest with what they are feeling even if it involves confrontation because that is how a relationship grows.

You can also tell this person in the fantasy world marriage is the solution for everything but in the real worlds even the best marriages have problems and conflicts.

I firmly believe that this soldier and his/her intended should have the parents blessing to get married that is important or if the parents are past away have the families blessings.

Be honest, be truthful be direct and be real with this person. To have a covenant you must sacrifice.

Peace be with you, Encourager for God

Answer 3

There is no formal written counseling for marriage, but you need to sit down with the soldier and discuss financial responsibilites, and other other aspects of being a military family.

Answer 4

Yes that is correct as long as the parents give consent. You will not face UCMJ, but may face ridicule from your fellow soldiers due to the difference in age. I married my HS girlfriend when I came home for exodus. I was 18 (joined the army at 17) at the time & she was 17 & a senior. We were both young.

Answer 5

my husband had to counsel a few soldiers before they got married. mainly advising the soldier how to enroll in deers, medical benefits, the system and how to prepare the spouse for military life and so on.

Answer 6

Well, you really don't have any say in it if the soldier is getting married.. just give him the thumbs up and everything will go good.

Answer 7

My advice.....take a couple days leave and go to your local court and just sit and watch child support court cases, and listen in on the divorce cases. That should make your young troop run screaming back into the barracks for good!

Answer 8

Hey there.....easy question...not so easy an answer. Ask another team leader what protocol is. Not much to it from what I am told.

Good luck and take care

Answer 9

Check with the your battalion chaplain- I've been out for a while, but my brother in the 82nd mentioned that the chaplain gives "relationship training"-Good Luck!

Answer 10

Not much of a team leader if you come to Yahoo answers to get advice on that type of question.